Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

firegirl1993

Offline (yesterday at 8:08am) | Search for a member

firegirl1993

4Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 4 July 1993 (21 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 4722
  • Number of comments : 47
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About firegirl1993 : A few things I flippin love:
Harry Potter, Sherlock, Doctor Who, MLP, Supernatural, Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Merlin, Castle, and The Big Bang Theory.

Because I get asked a lot, I was born on the fourth of July, and a lot of people connect that to FIREcrackers, and so my user name is FIREgirl

firegirl1993's page activity

Visits<b>Bree06</b> - the 04/13/2015 at 7:14am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/01/2015 at 9:15am<b>broncosfan1996</b> - the 03/31/2015 at 1:28am<b>Jake42100</b> - the 03/15/2015 at 1:01pm<b>rootbeer42</b> - the 03/15/2015 at 12:10am<b>venomousflower</b> - the 03/11/2015 at 10:43am<b>thecman25</b> - the 03/10/2015 at 9:02pm<b>Elgaard</b> - the 03/07/2015 at 8:14am<b>ChoolyBooly</b> - the 03/04/2015 at 12:25am<b>julianbozikovic</b> - the 01/29/2015 at 11:28am<b>sdlr32787</b> - the 01/13/2015 at 1:47pm<b>Holmes27</b> - the 01/05/2015 at 2:10am<b>HaonSnevets</b> - the 12/28/2014 at 11:29pm<b>marcusaaaa</b> - the 12/07/2014 at 1:00pm<b>Garrett2818</b> - the 11/19/2014 at 8:46am<b>Tthug</b> - the 11/08/2014 at 11:29am<b>Phaeno</b> - the 10/28/2014 at 11:33pm<b>15499kiwis</b> - the 10/07/2014 at 5:26pm

Fucked!<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/01/2015 at 3:15pm<b>Jake42100</b> - the 03/15/2015 at 6:01pm<b>venomousflower</b> - the 03/11/2015 at 3:43pm<b>ChoolyBooly</b> - the 03/04/2015 at 6:25am

firegirl1993's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

See all of firegirl1993's badges

firegirl1993's favorite FMLs

Today, I got a call from my 8 year old son's teacher. Apparently, my kid has been charging girls a quarter to touch his "special area." FML

#15472026
413 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50150) - you deserved it (8173)

On 03/24/2011 at 8:43pm - misc - by omg - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I locked the door to our only bathroom so my two year old wouldn't get in and make a mess. I crapped my pants while trying to unlock it with the key that rests on the frame. FML

#15447949
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16111) - you deserved it (31739)

On 03/23/2011 at 12:11pm - kids - by Cuzles (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I locked the door to our only bathroom so my two year old wouldn't get in and make a mess. I crapped my pants while trying to unlock it with the key that rests on the frame. FML

#15447949
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16111) - you deserved it (31739)

On 03/23/2011 at 12:11pm - kids - by Cuzles (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I got a call from my daughter’s teacher asking me to come pick her up. My daughter wouldn’t tell her what was wrong. I left an important work meeting. When I got there she stated her boyfriend broke up with her and she couldn't emotionally make it through the rest of the day. She's 5. FML

Today, my 400 pound roommate brought home a 400 pound guy. Now there's 800 pounds of sex going on in the next room, and it sounds like the invasion of Normandy in there. FML

#14835077
272 comments

I agree, your life sucks (70120) - you deserved it (6587)

On 02/04/2011 at 12:42am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, at a restaurant, I ordered the best chocolate soufflé on the menu, which was called "Double Satisfaction". The waiter asked me what would I like to order. The words that came out of my mouth were "Double Orgasm". FML

#14796617
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18747) - you deserved it (39149)

On 02/01/2011 at 12:42pm - intimacy - by theshameofit (woman) - Cyprus (Limassol)

Today, in the middle of the night, my girlfriend whispered "Are you asleep?" I chose not to respond, to see what she'd do. She then let rip a loud, stinking fart, giggled, and went back to sleep. FML

#14610611
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15133) - you deserved it (38117) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/17/2011 at 4:53am - misc - by SkinsCastSelection - France - Chosen by the cast of Skins

Today, my girlfriend was giving me a hand job. As I reached my climax, she thought it would be funny to turn my 'weapon' against me. Boom, headshot. FML

#14610613
245 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40967) - you deserved it (26908) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/17/2011 at 4:53am - intimacy - by SkinsCastSelection - France - Chosen by the cast of Skins

Today, my daughter was expelled from her school for beating another kindergartener with a Dr. Seuss book. FML

#14567167
213 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33809) - you deserved it (7105)

On 01/13/2011 at 3:48pm - kids - by me - United States

Today, I lied when my therapist asked why I preferred Tuesday morning appointments. It's actually because World of Warcraft is down for regularly scheduled maintenance. FML

#14034563
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10141) - you deserved it (33151)

On 11/30/2010 at 10:23am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I told my boyfriend I wanted to see more of his passionate side. He pushed my head down towards his lap. FML

#13945313
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27031) - you deserved it (13149)

On 11/23/2010 at 1:50am - intimacy - by Username -

Today, I jokingly asked my husband if he had ever cheated on me. In the most sincere and honest tone, he said "if I ever have or ever will, there's no way you would ever find out. I love you too much to lose you", and gave me a hug. FML

#13697546
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37054) - you deserved it (7915)

On 11/03/2010 at 2:40am - intimacy - by spockswifey - United States

Today, my girlfriend and my parents staged an intervention, and have asked me to go to rehab. What they want me to go to rehab for? World of Warcraft. FML

#13588897
260 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10631) - you deserved it (63192)

On 10/25/2010 at 11:06am - misc - by leve80paladin (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I asked my boyfriend why he chose me out of all the hotter girls out there. He told me it's because I have great birthing hips. Apparently I'm having six children. FML

#13495933
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29832) - you deserved it (5253)

On 10/18/2010 at 5:06am - love - by louise. - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I lost the remote control to my TV. I can't change the channel manually on it, and the channel it's stuck on is currently playing an infomercial for the Pos-T-Vac penis pump. I've been watching this for an hour now. I'm a female, and I'm beginning to feel like I need this product. FML

#13403987
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29083) - you deserved it (9058)

On 10/11/2010 at 6:50am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)



FML's blog

  • Essa's illustrated FML
  • Yesterday was labor day in the US. FML is international, and and specifically US-centric, but we still sat around doing nothing because we'll take any excuse to do anything. We'll endorse any national…

Friday 1 May 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: