Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

filledelest

Offline (the 01/20/2016 at 4:04pm) | Search for a member

filledelest

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1404
  • Number of comments : 6
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

filledelest's page activity

Visits<b>Bluemonster3</b> - the 01/29/2012 at 5:19pm<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 11:33pm<b>IIIlibras</b> - the 07/30/2011 at 11:47am

filledelest's FML badges

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

Happy Ending

Brandon may have an FML, but he ended up marrying Jessica. You found this out by reading “FML, the follow up.”

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of filledelest's badges

filledelest's favorite FMLs

Today, while waiting in line to get my medication, a man who just got his prescription looked me up and down and said "Penis pills, right? Ya look like the type." Then he walked out as a couple of other guys in line started snickering. FML

#21478497
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21909) - you deserved it (1666)

On 10/11/2015 at 2:45am - health - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I heard a noise outside in the middle of the night, so I went out for a look. I'm also pregnant and can't stop farting. I get 2 steps outside and accidentally let a huge one rip, then, from the shadows I hear "Oh my god!" and then running in the opposite direction. I farted away a prowler. FML

#21470966
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29276) - you deserved it (2981)

On 09/21/2015 at 10:45am - misc - by Gassy - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I fed my 4ft python a live rat for the first time. He now has a new friend he won't let me near. FML

Today, it was my first day working at a library. I expected it to be fun and peaceful, not to end up having to call the cops on a guy who started jerking off into a book. FML

#21446464
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26345) - you deserved it (1721)

On 07/24/2015 at 10:02am - work - by fishingforubies2 - Aruba

Today, I was on a boat and I thought I saw a towel fly off, but it was actually my fricken dog. FML

#21426414
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32820) - you deserved it (5147)

On 06/15/2015 at 10:49am - animals - by justin Bieber - United States (Michigan)

Today, I walked in on my roommate with her ass cheeks spread wide, and her friend ripping a strip of wax off of her while wearing a headlamp flashlight to see if she "got it all". FML

#21420563
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33835) - you deserved it (4073)

On 06/04/2015 at 3:06am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, my 6-year-old daughter barged into the bathroom while I was peeing, inspected the toilet and said, "You're well hydrated, good job." FML

#21405462
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30576) - you deserved it (3827)

On 05/06/2015 at 1:22am - kids - by seethroughpee - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I found out that, given the correct velocity, a used condom can actually fly through a tiny window and slap you on the leg. I also found out that when you go to the window to yell at the perpetrator, they might have more ammunition. FML

Today, I had to teach my grandma how to burn files to CDs. I jokingly said that it doesn't involve literally burning the disks in fire, to which she responded by slapping me and calling me a patronizing brat. FML

#21383501
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24617) - you deserved it (13451)

On 03/29/2015 at 10:03am - misc - by shamwazzlefarznarfnarfwoofbaaa (man) - United States (New York)

Today, my husband came home, drunk and with lipstick smeared on his face. When I confronted him about it, he just slurred, "Ah don't worry babe, it ain't mine." FML

#21343515
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35355) - you deserved it (2810)

On 01/24/2015 at 3:26pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Birmingham)

Today, I found my intoxicated step-father in our back yard trying to domesticate a stray opossum, attempting to give it steak and malt liquor. FML

#21334215
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29001) - you deserved it (2326)

On 01/09/2015 at 10:41pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I got a call from my roommate's mother, asking me to hide her flip flops so she couldn't wear them out in sub-zero temperatures. FML

#21327005
26 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28604) - you deserved it (2841)

On 12/30/2014 at 4:57am - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Oxfordshire)

Today, I slept on the plane ride home and had a scary nightmare. I started screaming in my dream, so loud that it shocked the old lady sitting next to me into screaming as well. The whole plane began laughing as we were both screaming. FML

Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend. Things got heated and I yelled, "Who's your daddy?" With a blank expression she replied, "I don't know." FML

#21326143
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34417) - you deserved it (17062)

On 12/28/2014 at 9:49pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Delaware)

Today, my mom and I went to exchange a massive stuffed animal, which was meant for my niece. I was carrying it when I saw a really hot guy looking at me funny. My mom snickered and told him that I never go anywhere without "George". FML

#21325643
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33389) - you deserved it (3243)

On 12/28/2014 at 1:52am - misc - by thanks a lot mom - United States (California)



Maïté Verjux's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Auntie Bernie delivers in 2016
  • Greetings my young friends! It's 2016 and I'm late. No, I'm not pregnant, I'm way too old for that sort of thing, even though I've been trying a lot recently (hey there Didier, you randy rascal…

Friday 5 February 2016

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: