About feven : I've had this app since forever.
feven's FML badges
I never take things to heart
Having said that, my 3 comments on that FML were really worth it.
You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.
You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.
feven's favorite FMLs
Today, I made an attempt to be nicer to customers at my job as instructed, which resulted in me listening to a handful of elderly people's incontinence issues, and a meth-addict's multiple abortions in detail. FML
by -_- / 03/14/2016 at 9:46pm / United States (Florida) / Work
Today, I walked to an interview on my college campus. I got there early. The place was empty. I assumed I wrote the date wrong. Several hours later, a friend who also was interviewed asked me how my interview went. The date, time and location were all right. I don't know how I got lost. FML
by Needamap / 02/25/2016 at 5:20pm / United States (Illinois) / Work
Today, at my job drug testing high schoolers, I see that one of the kids selected for the testing looked incredibly high. So, after he goes in the bathroom and gives me his cup with his urine inside, I take a closer look and see that the little shit jizzed in the cup. I hate my job. FML
by zachhewett / 02/02/2016 at 5:53pm / United States (Alabama) / Work
Today, I was driving back home when I saw a yellow object flying off my roof of my car through the side mirrors. I thought nothing of it, then I noticed that I didn't have my phone with me. That's when I realized that the "flying yellow object" was my phone. FML
by Anonymous / 02/01/2016 at 10:48pm / United States (Georgia) / Transportation
Today, I was doing laundry while my boyfriend was sitting at the table playing on his phone. I glanced over and caught him watching my ass as I put clothes in the dryer. Trying to be sexy, I looked at him as I slowly bent over to put more clothes in. Instead, I hit my head hard on the dryer door. FML
by RuasaLove / 07/29/2015 at 10:34pm / United States (New Jersey) / Intimacy
Today, I found out my husband potty trained my stubborn three year old son who prefers diapers. He managed this by peeing with him and "sword-fighting" with their urine streams. I now have to clean pee off the ground every time he urinates. FML
by diapersplease / 06/06/2015 at 9:17pm / United States (New York) / Kids
Today, at work, I was about to close a big sale, when a coworker rushed over and said there was a call for me in the office. He heavily implied my mom had died, and I rushed out. After I figured out there was no call and that my mom was fine, he'd already stolen my sale and the commission. FML
by Anonymous / 05/15/2015 at 4:58pm / United States (Illinois) / Work
Today, I went to bring my 92-year-old neighbor some cake we had just made. When I walked in, she was wearing pants. That's it. I stared blinking in shock for a few seconds before running away, yelling, "So sorry. I brought you cake. Real tired. Gonna sleep now. Bye." FML
by Nikki / 05/12/2015 at 8:33pm / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 05/01/2015 at 11:25am / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 03/30/2015 at 6:30am / United States (Ohio) / Intimacy
by generic_name123 / 03/09/2015 at 9:55am / United States (District of Columbia) / Love
Today, I went to the doctor, because I've been having stomach pains and nausea for weeks. He ended up gravely telling me I'm pregnant. I freaked out and panicked about what my parents would say. Then his laughter reminded me that I'm a guy. A really stupid one. FML
by actually just constipated.. and stupid / 03/04/2015 at 10:03am / Tunisia / Health
Today, I got out of the shower and walked into my living room to see my sis' and her boyfriend sitting very closely on our family's fairly large couch. I laughed and said, "Look at the happy couple." Then her now ex-boyfriend burst into tears. Turns out they'd just broken up. FML
by Anonymous / 01/28/2015 at 7:59pm / United States (Mississippi) / Love
Today, my dad and I were having a conversation about boneless chicken. He told me that they are raised boneless, going into detail, and I bought every word of it. Not until he started laughing did I realize how gullible I really am. I'm 22. FML
by katrina2d / 01/27/2015 at 12:43am / United States (Washington) / Miscellaneous
by PO'd big bro / 01/12/2015 at 8:11pm / United States (Georgia) / Miscellaneous