About feldco1 : College student just taking it one day at a time. I love sports but football takes the top spot.
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Today, I realized just how bad I am in bed when my girlfriend literally yawned the words, "Oh God" while attempting to fake an orgasm. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27926) - you deserved it (6866)
On 02/21/2013 at 3:46am - intimacy - by pornhastaughtmenothing - United States (Washington)
Today, after confronting my boyfriend about cheating on me, he confessed to everything. I was caught off guard by his honesty, but not nearly as caught off guard as I was when he eagerly questioned me on when our breakup sex will be. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20632) - you deserved it (1699)
On 10/12/2012 at 5:27am - intimacy - by You're NOT getting lucky today hun (woman) - Australia (Victoria)
Today, I was out shopping, when I noticed a teenage girl with a double stroller picking up a pack of condoms. I couldn't help but mutter that it was a little late for those. A guy who must have been her boyfriend then stormed over and beat the shit out of me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11413) - you deserved it (47664)
On 09/10/2012 at 1:52pm - intimacy - by killmenow - United States (Washington)
Today, I was cycling with my uncle and became increasingly frustrated as we got further and further from our intended destination. It took me a while to figure out that I had somehow lost my uncle and was following a complete stranger. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7123) - you deserved it (13635)
On 09/10/2012 at 6:40am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (Queensland)
Today, I was giving my boyfriend head on the living room couch. Apparently his two cats didn't approve, and they started attacking my face. Luckily for him, since my boyfriend was holding my head down, his privates didn't get a scratch. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18680) - you deserved it (3444)
On 08/15/2012 at 1:15pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Indiana)
Today, I was sitting in my school's crowded auditorium. When our single, abstinence-only ballsack of a Sex Ed teacher was announced to be stepping down due to being pregnant, I burst into uncontrollable laughter. My reward was aching sides and a week of detention. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20016) - you deserved it (914)
On 03/15/2012 at 9:31pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States
Today, I started speaking gibberish in the middle of the conversation with my mom to see if she would notice. She didn't. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19268) - you deserved it (2273)
On 02/15/2012 at 8:54pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I was standing in the bathroom and farted. It felt like someone stabbed me in the butt. I jumped out of shock, and my head slammed into the mirror. My glasses fell onto the floor and broke. I now need new glasses, a new mirror, and an ice pack for my head. All because I farted. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16112) - you deserved it (7267)
On 01/29/2012 at 8:27pm - health - by Rachal - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, my 4 year-old daughter's favorite expression became "shit balls." FML
I agree, your life sucks (24135) - you deserved it (11458)
On 07/28/2011 at 1:39am - kids - by anonymous - United States (New Jersey)
Today, I proposed to my girlfriend. She was so happy that she began flapping her hands around and screaming. She was flapping her hands so hard she smacked herself in the face and started crying. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29931) - you deserved it (5022)
Today, I had to pick my parents up from jail. They thought it would be okay to have sex behind a bush. FML
I agree, your life sucks (40111) - you deserved it (3368)
On 06/20/2011 at 11:57am - intimacy - by Username - United States (Texas)
Today, I was driving back home with my mom when we saw two squirrels having sex in the road. I told her to just honk the horn. She said that I was being selfish, that sex is a beautiful thing, and that we should let them finish. We sat there for at least five minutes. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35532) - you deserved it (4360)
On 05/21/2011 at 9:00pm - intimacy - by squirrels69ing (man) - United States (Illinois)
Today, I woke up to a mosquito feeding on my morning wood; probably the only thing that will ever suck my penis. FML
I agree, your life sucks (51358) - you deserved it (7809)
On 05/21/2011 at 5:07am - intimacy - by no one - United States (Alaska)
Today, as I was filling out divorce paperwork, I realized that my son has had the same girlfriend through both of my marriages. He's 17. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15340) - you deserved it (37675)
On 05/12/2011 at 7:09am - love - by Username -
Today, someone asked my wife if I was her father. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26465) - you deserved it (5695)
On 05/01/2011 at 3:03am - misc - by Steve.mc - Canada (British Columbia)
Monday 17 June 2013
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