Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

fejalsd

Search for a member

fejalsd

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 3625
  • Number of comments : 1
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

fejalsd's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

fejalsd's favorite FMLs

Today, I was rejected for a job I really wanted, they said I didn't have enough experience. I designed the systems they are implementing. FML

#7158540
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33928) - you deserved it (1711)

On 01/05/2010 at 2:16am - work - by Me - France

Today, I slipped on a patch of ice and fell. I would have fallen straight onto my ass, but thankfully my testicles broke my fall. FML

#7143279
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36520) - you deserved it (2721)

On 01/04/2010 at 8:34am - health - by Soresack (man) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I handed my friend a $50. I paid her to take care of my farm on Farmville, feed my fish on Fishville, and flip my burgers on Cafe World, while I went on vacation for a week. FML

#7122357
196 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9410) - you deserved it (60270)

On 01/03/2010 at 7:00am - misc - by loser (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my mother forwarded me an email my stepdad had sent her because he was annoyed that I left a light on last night. Talk about communication problems. I wonder how I'm going to tell them I'm pregnant. FML

#7121728
203 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29758) - you deserved it (6014)

On 01/03/2010 at 5:36am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - South Africa (Western Cape)

Today, I was sitting at the bar of a popular local restaurant. I sat there for a few hours and drank my sorrows away with the bartender. I thought she was pretty, and decided to give her a large tip. The tip sent me over my credit card limit, and the bartender is not single. FML

#7117686
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6518) - you deserved it (29577)

On 01/03/2010 at 1:36am - misc - by halien1982 (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I got all dressed up for a New Year's party. When my parents and siblings left the house to their parties, I got undressed. I wasn't going to a party. I only got dressed up so my family would think I had plans. FML

#7089085
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29434) - you deserved it (6037)

On 01/01/2010 at 8:19pm - misc - by Shawna (woman) - United States (Delaware)

Today, my boyfriend and I were play wrestling. I had pinned him down and was sitting on his chest when he suddenly squeezed my stomach, causing me to rip the loudest fart ever. He looked so shocked that I couldn't help but laugh. I laughed so hard that I accidentally peed on him as well. FML

#7059042
214 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37860) - you deserved it (17639)

On 12/31/2009 at 3:04pm - love - by pottypattypeepants (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was at work and I had to take a dump. Since I was the only person in the bathroom, I started singing, "I'm taking a poopy-poop poop poop poop." I was not the only person in the bathroom. FML

#7050962
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8112) - you deserved it (57032)

On 12/31/2009 at 3:06am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, the instructions on my new IKEA bed made me cry. It includes a picture of a person working alone with a frown crossed out and is replaced by two smiling people working together. I have no one in my life to help me. FML

#7036461
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37215) - you deserved it (4273)

On 12/30/2009 at 2:07pm - love - by hatelife (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I woke up with the flu that causes me to throw up violently until I dry heave and can't breathe. I told my mom I would rather have the runs, and not even a minute later, I got them. So now if I move too fast, I throw up, and if I don't move fast enough, I shit myself. FML

#7022853
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35765) - you deserved it (3354)

On 12/29/2009 at 10:11pm - health - by sickofsick - United States

Today, I gave my 7 year old a snowglobe. I had spent the last week deconstructing it, putting an action figure of his favorite cartoon character inside, and then putting it back together. Later, I find it smashed into pieces because he wanted to "play with the toy it came with." FML

#6998138
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24650) - you deserved it (6436)

On 12/28/2009 at 7:22pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I came home from a year long backpacking trip in Europe. During my absence my parents divorced, dad took the house and most of the money, sister is seven months pregnant, brother was arrested for statutory rape, and my mom pawned all my stuff to buy booze to "cope." Oh, and my fish died. FML

#6989911
264 comments

I agree, your life sucks (83829) - you deserved it (4751)

On 12/28/2009 at 7:08am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I allowed my friend to talk me into going on a date. The guy's truck smelled like formaldehyde - I'm assuming from the snake that he apparently tried to turn into a necklace. FML

#6985807
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22629) - you deserved it (2685)

On 12/28/2009 at 1:26am - love - by KittyNeko (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my parents bought me an alarm clock that runs away from you while beeping obnoxiously when you hit snooze. I just had ankle surgery and am unable to walk. FML

#6966351
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27654) - you deserved it (2387)

On 12/27/2009 at 12:35am - misc - by Crippled (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was feeling proud of myself because I finally quit World Of Warcraft. I later found out about the gift my dad's family gave me. It was a 12-month subscription to World Of Warcraft. FML

#6960254
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26556) - you deserved it (7796)

On 12/26/2009 at 6:46pm - misc - by thatguy (man) - United States (Massachusetts)



Zach Stafford's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Zach's illustrated FML
  • Everybody's talking about Ebola at the moment. I have trouble keeping up with the latest trends. I'm going to wait until Christmas and see what special offers turn up in the shops, under funky new names…

Friday 17 October 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: