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An insomniac or a creature of the dark
You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.
I agree, their lives suck
200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.
Judgmental
You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.
Today, feeling tired, I snuck one of my wife's pills that she claims gives her super energy. I later found out it was our son's placenta, grounded up and made into capsules. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30036) - you deserved it (9632)
On 04/01/2013 at 12:49am - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)
Today, a blonde tourist came up to me and asked me for directions to the nearest train station. I politely directed her there, and she left. Five minutes later, she came back and slapped me for not bringing her to an "English-speaking station". We're in China, lady. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33795) - you deserved it (2240)
On 03/31/2013 at 2:19am - misc - by dumb tourists (man) - China (Beijing)
Today, my 19-year-old son told me his girlfriend is pregnant, and was diagnosed with an STD. He's sure that he's the father. He's also sure he doesn't have an STD, because he's a virgin. I had to give him the sex talk that his school never did, as well as explain to him that his girlfriend is a cheater. FML
I agree, your life sucks (38174) - you deserved it (11655)
On 03/29/2013 at 1:18pm - misc - by fucked by sex ed (man) - United States (Michigan)
Today, whilst texting my boyfriend on the train, I noticed the woman sitting next to me staring intently at my phone. After letting my boyfriend know, he sent a message saying, "Are we gonna involve the dog again? Last night was fun." She gasped and screamed that I'm a "twisted dog-humping bitch." FML
I agree, your life sucks (31845) - you deserved it (4580)
On 03/25/2013 at 8:28pm - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (London, City of)
Today, I went out to Applebees with a girl I like and a group of friends. Someone asked if the girl and I were dating. She instantly replied with a bit of disgust "What? No way, never!" It would have been nice to know before paying for the last ten or so dates we went on. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32872) - you deserved it (3484)
On 03/20/2013 at 1:38pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Michigan)
Today, my girlfriend left me because our "political views don't match" when I told her we needed to share house chores now that we live together. I know, I'm lost too. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25299) - you deserved it (1619)
On 03/19/2013 at 10:08pm - love - by dca101 (man) - United States
Today, I took my driver's test. I did everything flawlessly, but my examiner kept all but pissing his pants throughout. He yelled, "ARE YOU TRYING TO GET US KILLED?!" when I drove past a traffic light just as it was about to turn red. The road was almost empty. He failed me on the spot. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9528) - you deserved it (35483)
On 02/22/2013 at 8:47pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Australia
Today, my boyfriend and I had a disagreement over the pronunciation of the word "train." It turned into a heated debate that lasted all night and ended with us sleeping in separate rooms. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8296) - you deserved it (10148)
On 12/04/2012 at 3:12am - love - by superminty - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I asked my best friend if he would do me the honour of becoming my son's godfather. He replied, "Um, that's just rude. You know I'm an atheist." Huh? FML
I agree, your life sucks (15841) - you deserved it (5633)
On 07/28/2012 at 2:29pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I had to explain to my neighbor that black people aren't all lactose intolerant. His eyes still bulge out every time I eat cheese. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18921) - you deserved it (1272)
On 04/19/2012 at 3:34am - misc - by MI3 (woman) - United States (California)
Today, my now ex-boyfriend called me over for an "important chat". This chat consisted of him not only insisting that we have sex whenever he feels like it, but demanding that I take birth control pills, because making him wear a condom is "sexist and degrading". FML
I agree, your life sucks (32385) - you deserved it (4357)
On 11/18/2011 at 6:36pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)
Today, my mother in law grounded me because I went to the store in the "dangerous" rain. My husband says that if I don't obey then we won't work out. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28956) - you deserved it (3390)
On 03/08/2010 at 10:12am - misc - by anonymous - United States
Today, my fiancée and I were selecting our wedding cake. The wedding is now off since I refused to buy her the "dream" wedding cake she wanted because it was chocolate. She called me childish and cheap. I'm highly allergic to chocolate. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30117) - you deserved it (2370)
On 02/25/2010 at 4:47pm - misc - by Ringless - United States (Virginia)
Today, I went to a family counseling session because my parents are getting a divorce. I told the counselor that I feel guilty because I feel like I caused it. She says that there is no way I could have caused it, that it's my parents' problem when my mom interrupts her to say "Yes she did." FML
I agree, your life sucks (34260) - you deserved it (2436)
On 11/02/2009 at 4:05pm - misc - by problemchild (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, my girlfriend of eight years explained to me that the Egyptian pyramids were built by aliens from Mars. I have a B.S. in Biology and an M.S. in Anthropology, and I am working on my Ph.D. She thinks I'm an irrational idiot for telling her she is wrong. FML
I agree, your life sucks (38645) - you deserved it (7673)
On 07/23/2009 at 2:13am - work - by published_anthropologist (man) - United States
Monday 20 May 2013
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