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  • Town/Country : Not specified
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  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 4828
  • Number of comments : 24
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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fckaduck's page activity

Visits<b>claudiajean</b> - the 09/28/2016 at 1:01am<b>Chibster</b> - the 08/01/2016 at 2:47pm<b>Zatert</b> - the 07/16/2016 at 10:30am<b>Purrr</b> - the 04/18/2016 at 11:31am<b>Hilda_x</b> - the 03/21/2016 at 8:50am<b>Avi8r</b> - the 02/19/2016 at 9:26am<b>dno79</b> - the 12/13/2015 at 12:24pm<b>barisozdemir</b> - the 11/26/2015 at 3:49am<b>ratman775</b> - the 11/21/2015 at 11:40am<b>FyeahPoet</b> - the 11/01/2015 at 10:20am<b>mikeman1744</b> - the 06/08/2015 at 2:48am<b>ryerye942</b> - the 06/04/2015 at 11:18pm<b>abby1212</b> - the 05/25/2015 at 10:18pm<b>ishmelbacon</b> - the 05/04/2015 at 4:16am<b>rocker_chick23</b> - the 03/02/2015 at 5:30pm<b>zanoty</b> - the 03/02/2015 at 5:13pm<b>joewerst1</b> - the 03/02/2015 at 2:47pm<b>Gillett</b> - the 03/02/2015 at 1:45pm

fckaduck's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

fckaduck's favorite FMLs

Today, my girlfriend of eight years explained to me that the Egyptian pyramids were built by aliens from Mars. I have a B.S. in Biology and an M.S. in Anthropology, and I am working on my Ph.D. She thinks I'm an irrational idiot for telling her she is wrong. FML

by published_anthropologist / 07/23/2009 at 2:13am / United States / Work

Today, I was going on a first date with a girl I really like. We were going to see the new Harry Potter movie, and she told me she was getting all dressed up. It was only after I picked her up I realized she meant that she was dressing nicely. I was dressed as Harry Potter. FML

by harrysolo / 07/18/2009 at 9:26pm / United States (Michigan) / Miscellaneous

Today, I learned that walking on the sidewalk does not mean that you will not be hit by a car. FML

by Anonymous / 07/16/2009 at 1:32am / United States (Maryland) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was cuddling with my boyfriend watching a movie, my boyfriend then leans in and says: "You know, you're my favourite girlfriend." I then jokingly responded by saying: "You say that like I'm not the only girlfriend you have right now." I hate being right. FML

by dinapar / 07/14/2009 at 10:02am / Canada (Manitoba) / Miscellaneous

Today, my girlfriend, who never initiates sex, pulled me into my room and onto my bed with kisses and other seductive behavior. As I'm thinking about how awesome it is that's she's doing this for once, she reaches down, grabs my underwear, and gives me the worst wedgie I've ever received. FML

by robinhoood / 07/12/2009 at 1:38am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I have to choose between one eyebrow or none because I'm a heavy sleeper and my brother is a moron. FML

by wow / 07/11/2009 at 4:02pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went to see my grandmother. She has alzheimers and doesn't remember me sometimes, and today she thought I was her sister and that I was trying to steal my grandfather from her. She hit me with a cane and called me a slut. FML

by lady_jeni / 07/09/2009 at 3:29am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was in my car and a cute guy pulled up next to me. He looked at me and smiled, but in order to be cool, I pretended not to notice. I also pretended that I was listening to music and was completely absorbed in it, singing passionately. I wasn't even listening to music and my window was down. FML

by Anonymous / 07/06/2009 at 6:36pm / United States (California) / Transportation

Today, I made a bowl of spaghetti for my girlfriend and me. I tried the move from Lady and the Tramp where the boy and girl both slurp the same piece of spagetti and end up kissing. When I tried it, the spagetti went too down far my throat, and I ended up throwing it up on her. FML

by spitballer1 / 07/06/2009 at 12:54pm / United States (New Jersey) / Love

Today, at the restaurant I work at, I gave a man back his change and told him to enjoy the sunny day. He replied by dramatically saying that the sun was his mortal enemy. Thinking he was joking, I asked him if he was a vampire. Turns out he has skin cancer. FML

by Kristache / 07/02/2009 at 4:31am / Canada (British Columbia) / Miscellaneous

Today, my mother woke me up by saying "Good morning my sexually aggressive daughter. We're going to have an extremely uncomfortable conversation today." Our awkward talk consisted of her telling me that I'm a tease and am going to get raped. Why? She caught me making out with my boyfriend. FML

by wildthing / 07/01/2009 at 3:33pm / United States (Florida) / Intimacy

Today, I planned a romantic dinner with rose petals, the whole lot, for my ex-girlfriend to win her back. When I took her to my house I told her to guess what I had planned, to which she replied "I hope it's not a stupid romantic dinner with rose petals and shit." FML

by ipopnlok / 06/29/2009 at 2:31am / Australia (Victoria) / Love

Today, I had my boss and his family over for dinner. Our kids played while waiting for dinner to be ready. Just as we were sitting to eat, our 8-year-olds ran out and my son says "Look at Baxter! I found underwear with a tail hole!" They had found my crotchless panties and put them on the dog. FML

by Anonymous / 06/29/2009 at 1:07am / United States (Connecticut) / Kids

Today, I was in a public restroom when the girl in the stall next to me started asking me how I was doing. Thinking it was weird but not wanting to be rude, I answered her questions. Halfway though our conversation she said: "Hold on, the girl in the stall next to me thinks I'm talking to her." FML

by embarrassed4life / 06/25/2009 at 12:34am / United States (Colorado) / Miscellaneous

Today, we were having a school prize giving. I heard my name called and I walked up to the stage waving and smiling, feeling rather proud of myself. I stood by the microphone and started my acceptance speech, only to be tapped on the shoulder by the girl they actually called up. FML

by Jessey / 06/18/2009 at 9:05am / United Kingdom (Swindon) / Miscellaneous