fckaduck

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fckaduck

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 4639
  • Number of comments : 24
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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fckaduck's page activity

Visits<b>Purrr</b> - the 04/18/2016 at 11:31am<b>Hilda_x</b> - the 03/21/2016 at 8:50am<b>Avi8r</b> - the 02/19/2016 at 9:26am<b>dno79</b> - the 12/13/2015 at 12:24pm<b>barisozdemir</b> - the 11/26/2015 at 3:49am<b>ratman775</b> - the 11/21/2015 at 11:40am<b>FyeahPoet</b> - the 11/01/2015 at 10:20am<b>mikeman1744</b> - the 06/08/2015 at 2:48am<b>ryerye942</b> - the 06/04/2015 at 11:18pm<b>abby1212</b> - the 05/25/2015 at 10:18pm<b>ishmelbacon</b> - the 05/04/2015 at 4:16am<b>rocker_chick23</b> - the 03/02/2015 at 5:30pm<b>zanoty</b> - the 03/02/2015 at 5:13pm<b>joewerst1</b> - the 03/02/2015 at 2:47pm<b>Gillett</b> - the 03/02/2015 at 1:45pm<b>ClumsyK25</b> - the 03/02/2015 at 12:01pm<b>ninjakitty254</b> - the 01/11/2015 at 1:46am<b>Cortana101</b> - the 12/11/2014 at 8:19am

fckaduck's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

fckaduck's favorite FMLs

Today, while working as a cashier, I was flirting with this cute girl. When I asked her if she had her store card she said "No", paused, then said "Can I give you my number?". I said "Sure, that would be awesome, do you want mine?". She said no. I didn't know I could just enter the card number. FML

by fyourlife / 10/21/2009 at 3:53pm / United States (New Jersey) / Love

Today, I was at the Salvation Army when I saw a wheelchair in the miscellaneous aisle. I thought it would be fun to ride around in it. As I was wheeling it back to where I found it, I made it back just as it's owner was hobbling out of the dressing room. FML

by imok / 10/07/2009 at 1:58pm / United States (Michigan) / Miscellaneous

Today, in the middle of the night, I was punched in the face by my frightened girlfriend, who had just been awoken by her own fart. FML

by P0wned / 09/29/2009 at 5:21pm / France (Bretagne) / Love

Today, my boyfriend gave me a poem saying "Roses are red, violets are blue, rubbish is dumped and so are you." FML

by Anonymous / 09/14/2009 at 5:41am / South Africa (Gauteng) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was eating MandMs on a chair when I dropped one and it fell under my crotch. My mom came in to see my hand on my crotch and me muttering, "Where is that little bastard?" FML

by awilson / 09/11/2009 at 2:26pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Miscellaneous

Today, my 6 year old daughter somehow learned about sex. She also had the open house at her school where she meets her new teachers. When the teacher asked where she came from, she said, "My daddy's happy sacks." FML

by Ben / 08/21/2009 at 5:28pm / United States / Intimacy

Today, I had to go to the police station to pick up my 42 year old dad. Why? He was caught stealing candy. FML

by ahhahaha / 08/11/2009 at 11:07pm / United States (New Mexico) / Kids

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I went ice skating for my friend's birthday. We had to vacate the skating rink so that they could smooth out the rink for the next session. I don't know how to skate and my friends left me. Not only was I the last one out of the rink, but I had to crawl my way out with everyone laughing. FML

by elmangy / 08/11/2009 at 12:58pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, my mom drove me to football practice. On the way she told me that she thought I was gay and that my friend was my lover. After 15 agonizing minutes of this, we get to my practice only to be greeted by my shirtless friend wearing a pink bandana saying "Man, you hit me hard last night." FML

by Anonymous / 08/10/2009 at 3:10am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was at the mall with my little brother. I saw him touching some expensive objects, so I slapped his arm. I noticed he wasn't my brother when he started crying and his real mom slapped me in the face. FML

by mochiko / 08/09/2009 at 3:28am / United States (Washington) / Kids

Today, me and my boyfriend were fooling around on my bed when things started to get heated. I said to him, "Do what ever you want". He got up and said he'd be right back. I thought he went to get a condom. He came back with a sandwich. FML

by sandwichsex / 08/08/2009 at 6:39pm / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I had my first blow job. My girlfriend thought it would be sexy to "caress" my ball sack. By caress she meant bitch slap from side to side. FML

by BeboKhaos / 08/03/2009 at 10:37pm / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, my 250 lb ex-Marine dad announced he was going to start randomly punching me in the crotch, without warning, to "improve my reflexes." FML

by theregoesmyspermcount / 08/02/2009 at 6:45pm / United States (Texas) / Health

Today, I was peeing in a urinal at a bar. A drunk guy comes in, and seeing no urinals open, he decides to pee between my legs from behind me. He didn't have good aim. FML

by webperson04 / 07/27/2009 at 3:07pm / United States (Louisiana) / Miscellaneous

Today, my son decided to come out of the closet by wearing a shirt that said "Mom, I'm gay" to the family reunion. FML

by Mom / 07/25/2009 at 5:14pm / United States (Kentucky) / Kids