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fatfudger

Offline (the 11/03/2014 at 7:52am) | Search for a member

fatfudger

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  • Number of visits : 976
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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fatfudger's page activity

Visits<b>Welshite</b> - the 10/05/2014 at 11:16pm<b>OhWhoCares</b> - the 08/03/2014 at 11:43am<b>Wizardo</b> - the 08/01/2014 at 6:29pm<b>WD_Stevens</b> - the 06/03/2014 at 1:59pm<b>AliceLiddel</b> - the 03/17/2014 at 11:32pm<b>SundayNightSix</b> - the 02/04/2014 at 4:44am

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fatfudger's favorite FMLs

Today, I was giving lifeguard instructions to a couple of teens. When I quizzed them about what they should do when someone is choking, one of them said, "Take a step back" and winked at me. FML

#21282836
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32183) - you deserved it (3357)

On 10/21/2014 at 11:18pm - work - by Australian Lifeguard - United States (Arizona)

Today, I was at a football game with my boyfriend. I said my hands were getting cold, hoping he'd hold them. He replied, "Uh, they make pockets for a reason..." and physically showed me how to put my hands in my pockets. FML

#21280399
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33101) - you deserved it (6540)

On 10/18/2014 at 10:53am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Illinois)

Today, my insomnia wins. I'm too wired and awake to sleep, but too stoned on my sleeping pills to get up and do something productive. FML

#21267554
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32075) - you deserved it (4007)

On 09/29/2014 at 8:06am - health - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I stuck one of those "kick me" signs on my friend's back for fun, and someone took the invitation. Unfortunately, my friend whirled around and beat the shit out of him. I managed to sneak the sign off his back, but now I feel like a total asshole. FML

#21243070
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19053) - you deserved it (44548)

On 08/22/2014 at 10:35am - misc - by oops (man) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, I wore a tank top for the first time in a few years. It turned out even worse than the last time. I got insulted by several people over my "Never say never" upper chest tattoo, which I got years ago, before the words ever became associated with a certain douchy Canadian pop "singer". FML

#21230914
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42197) - you deserved it (9152)

On 08/06/2014 at 12:45pm - misc - by beaverfever (man) - Poland (Zachodniopomorskie)

Today, I had a rough day and was extremely tired. I took a nap on the couch, and woke up to a guy robbing my house. I pretended I was still sleeping, waiting a chance to grab him or run out safely. I ended up falling back asleep. FML

#21219246
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41586) - you deserved it (21399)

On 07/24/2014 at 11:59am - misc - by FML - United States (Virginia)

Today, I was at the local grocery store. I've had really bad gas lately, and I accidentally let one go while standing in line. The woman behind me thought it was her kid, and smacked him for farting in public. FML

#21214127
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29686) - you deserved it (37942)

On 07/19/2014 at 1:39pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, the guy I've been seeing for a year and a half ended it. Why? He found another girl. "She's just like you." FML

#21213656
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48527) - you deserved it (3515)

On 07/19/2014 at 12:43am - love - by anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, after five years of dating, my boyfriend finally proposed to me. The words "just think of the tax breaks" were uttered. FML

#21208167
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40127) - you deserved it (4255)

On 07/13/2014 at 6:36pm - love - by justthinkofyourhand - United States (California)

Today, I was interviewing a woman for a job. She told me that she may need days off because of her artistic son. I jokingly replied, "Does he color on the walls or something?" She then stared at me with a weird look on her face. Autistic, her son is autistic. FML

#21205262
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37978) - you deserved it (19658)

On 07/10/2014 at 6:17pm - work - by dammit hearing aid - United States (Iowa)

Today, I realized that when a girl asks what your plans are for Valentine's Day and you say "nothing" and she responds with, "Oh, I don't have any plans either", it means she wants you to take her out. Took me three months to figure that out. FML

#21145130
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34015) - you deserved it (53219)

On 05/19/2014 at 1:15pm - love - by clueless - United States (California)

Today, while at work as a telemarketer, I called a customer on his home phone. Once I was connected, an automated voice said, "To speak with a customer, please press 1." Confused, I pressed one. I then heard loud laughter followed by, "Oh my god! What a dumbass!" before they hung up. FML

#21133762
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37792) - you deserved it (20063)

On 05/07/2014 at 11:57pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, while working at Home Depot, a customer tried to engage me in a conversation about which gardening tool would "hypothetically" be the best to kill his wife with. FML

#21132614
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43018) - you deserved it (3487)

On 05/06/2014 at 6:47pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Nevada)

Today, things were getting heated with the girlfriend. We were mostly naked, but mostly wouldn't do, so I kissed her deeply and whispered into her ear, "You should lose some weight". Clothes. I meant to say clothes. FML

Today, I was in my Honors English class. I sneezed very loudly while my teacher was giving a lecture. I had the genius idea to say, "Sorry, I'm allergic to bullshit." FML



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