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facelick

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facelick

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  • Number of visits : 770
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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facelick's page activity

Visits<b>Just_A_Tree</b> - the 10/14/2014 at 12:54am<b>xadoringx</b> - the 10/08/2014 at 5:44am<b>diesel_power</b> - the 09/02/2014 at 12:54am<b>danny_c_21</b> - the 09/01/2014 at 8:28pm<b>persianjr</b> - the 08/29/2014 at 2:22am<b>Mons</b> - the 08/15/2014 at 10:36am<b>detectivedipsiht</b> - the 08/09/2014 at 5:28pm<b>okcnation</b> - the 07/16/2014 at 3:37am<b>AJlatour</b> - the 06/30/2014 at 9:16am<b>llamaslikesoda</b> - the 06/19/2014 at 3:05am<b>rybaby23</b> - the 06/07/2014 at 2:50pm<b>joea21</b> - the 06/05/2014 at 11:25pm<b>MissFeats</b> - the 06/04/2014 at 10:21am<b>moonlightknight</b> - the 06/04/2014 at 12:19am<b>Beware00</b> - the 04/19/2014 at 10:10pm<b>garrett_8614</b> - the 03/15/2014 at 1:09pm<b>PancakeSlap</b> - the 02/24/2014 at 3:42pm<b>reymon8823</b> - the 12/14/2013 at 2:12am

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facelick's favorite FMLs

Today, I was on a date, and I went to put my arm around her, trying to be romantic, but my coordination went straight to hell. Instead of her shoulder, I ended up accidentally grabbing her tit. FML

#21302056
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27435) - you deserved it (6694)

On 11/19/2014 at 12:03pm - love - by oops (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, in the middle of a boring class, my friend offered me some Smarties. We're not allowed to eat in class, but I had a couple anyway. As I put them in my mouth, my "friend" stood up and yelled that I was doing ecstasy. I might actually get expelled. FML

#21301367
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36111) - you deserved it (3565)

On 11/18/2014 at 12:26pm - misc - by drugsforthugs - United States (California)

Today, while lying in bed cuddling with my cat after getting stood up, I found out that even 80-year-old Charles Manson is engaged to be married. FML

#21301256
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28887) - you deserved it (2981)

On 11/18/2014 at 5:41am - love - by jessiejaybee (woman) - United States

Today, I tried to blackmail my dad by threatening to tell mom about the bong and weed he keeps hidden in the garage. Turns out she already knew about it and neither of them give a shit. Now I'm grounded until the new year. FML

#21294812
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17480) - you deserved it (32738)

On 11/08/2014 at 3:36pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, my dad told me that my mom wanted to name me something "unusual." He eventually got her to compromise. I go by Violet. I now know that my legal name is Purple. FML

#21292947
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36158) - you deserved it (2404)

On 11/05/2014 at 8:12pm - misc - by Purple (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my mom talked to me and my brother about how great it was that our cousin was getting away from drugs and becoming sober, as he would have so many more opportunities opened up for him now. She explained all this while sitting on our patio, smoking a blunt. FML

#21287196
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31011) - you deserved it (3306)

On 10/28/2014 at 7:54pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, while reading 1984 on the train, a cute guy around my age and I got into a great a discussion about the book. Just when I thought he might ask for my number, he got up, patted me on the head and said it's so nice that kids my age still took interest in real literature. I'm 25. FML

#21284324
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35863) - you deserved it (2896)

On 10/24/2014 at 9:47am - misc - by anonymous - Austria (Wien)

Today, my best friend and I, after years of sexual tension, began to have sex for the first time. Things got heated and he decided to abruptly stand up with me around him. I got so nervous, spazzed out, and now have 37 staples in my head courtesy of his bookshelf. FML

#21284031
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32277) - you deserved it (5418)

On 10/23/2014 at 9:25pm - intimacy - by anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, I offered "Girls Gone Wild" as an example of bad TV in my lecture thinking it was a reality TV show. It's porn. FML

Today, I tried to propose to my girlfriend, but I was so nervous that I had a panic attack, fainted and split my head open. My girlfriend then fainted at the sight of the blood. An onlooker had to call an ambulance for both of us. FML

#21280696
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35724) - you deserved it (3573)

On 10/18/2014 at 9:23pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I watched from my office window as a couple maneuvered their car to squash a dead pigeon flat on the road. I then watched as they got out of the car, set up tripods and started taking photos of it. FML

Today, I left for a fifteen-hour drive with two guys who won't stop talking in a Yoda voice. Sick of this nonsense, I am. FML

#21277425
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32945) - you deserved it (4455)

On 10/14/2014 at 1:17am - misc - by longdrive - United States (California)

Today, I finally lost my virginity. Too bad it cost me every last shred of self-respect and involved begging a hooker to take my money. FML

#21275111
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32364) - you deserved it (19062)

On 10/10/2014 at 5:51pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I asked a passenger what he wanted to drink. When he said marijuana, I started making pot jokes. He really asked for mineral water. I was given a drug test when we landed. FML

#21269829
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29840) - you deserved it (10280)

On 10/02/2014 at 9:55pm - work - by stewardess - United States (Texas)



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