Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

f_my_flip_life

Search for a member

f_my_flip_life
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1080
  • Number of comments : 44
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

f_my_flip_life's last visitors

doglover100PoisonKissRiileydummydorycrzyrychellinha93n4te02

f_my_flip_life's FML badges

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

See all of f_my_flip_life's badges

f_my_flip_life's favorite FMLs

Today, I was heading to the bathroom when I clearly saw a little boy walking into my bedroom. My wife and I live alone, and I screamed at the top of my lungs, thinking he was a ghost. Turns out my wife collected him from school for a friend, and I just didn't hear them arrive. FML

#19608158
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18950) - you deserved it (5422)

On 05/11/2012 at 5:41pm - misc - by rongo12 (man) -

Today, I was calling my husband while driving. While the phone rang, I farted. As soon as the horrid smell hit my nose, my husband answered. I panicked and hung up quickly, thinking to myself how embarrassed I was because he could smell it. I'm an idiot. FML

#19282725
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6949) - you deserved it (30722)

On 03/15/2012 at 1:49pm - misc - by StinkyandStupid - United States

Today, I met my girlfriend's parents. Her huge, ex-Marine father took me out back, saying he wanted to show me something. That something was a machete. He savagely buried it in a tree stump and said, "Son, if you break my daughter's heart, that'll be your dick." FML

#19279132
240 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30917) - you deserved it (5592)

On 03/14/2012 at 9:06pm - intimacy - by PUA - United States (Georgia)

Today, I was half asleep and tried to cuddle my husband as we slept. Still dreaming, he yelled for me to leave his money alone. FML

#19249177
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16619) - you deserved it (3057)

On 03/10/2012 at 1:04am - love - by atsukobo - United States

Today, I was the 10th caller on a radio show. I answered the question correctly. The DJ informed I won a free air guitar of my choosing. I yelled with excitement over the air. The DJ then instructed me how to use my new air guitar. FML

#19245135
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8321) - you deserved it (27518)

On 03/09/2012 at 11:55am - misc - by h4rdy (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, the pervert in my computer class asked me if I "mowed my lawn." Not knowing this was a vaguely sexual term, I replied, "No, my dad does." FML

#18983166
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36928) - you deserved it (8388)

On 02/03/2012 at 9:47am - intimacy - by xX_nsn_Xx (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, while I was on the toilet, my cat managed to climb up behind me, slip and then grip itself to my bare ass. In my haste to get away from the cat, I pooped on the toilet without noticing. Until I sat back down. FML

#18966203
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21692) - you deserved it (4838)

On 02/01/2012 at 1:13am - animals - by Anonymous - Canada

Today, a coworker thought it would be funny to put a tack on my chair. When I sat down, it went directly into my butt. When I sprang up, I hit my head on a lamp. I then hit my head on my desk on the way down. FML

#18904057
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26927) - you deserved it (2358)

On 01/25/2012 at 12:03am - work - by Benjamin - United States (California)

Today, I was doing the reverse cowgirl with my boyfriend. I was on the way to a glorious finish when he pointed out that I had a pimple on my butt. He began to laugh so hard that he went soft. FML

#18271513
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31742) - you deserved it (4160)

On 11/17/2011 at 9:06am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, I punched myself in the face while trying to eat a GoGurt. FML

#18112620
309 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22570) - you deserved it (15018)

On 10/30/2011 at 4:15pm - misc - by yum yogurt - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I drove home on my birthday, and my mom said she'd meet me there. I was a little surprised to get home and find she wasn't there, but even more shocked to see my rabbit run over in my driveway. Turns out he'd gotten loose and my mom had run him over, panicked, and left. FML

#18101830
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26865) - you deserved it (1848)

On 10/29/2011 at 7:02am - animals - by Noname - United States

Today, I drove home on my birthday, and my mom said she'd meet me there. I was a little surprised to get home and find she wasn't there, but even more shocked to see my rabbit run over in my driveway. Turns out he'd gotten loose and my mom had run him over, panicked, and left. FML

#18101830
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26865) - you deserved it (1848)

On 10/29/2011 at 7:02am - animals - by Noname - United States

Today, I was washing my hands in the bathroom when I looked up and saw a spider on my cheek. Panicking, I slapped myself in the face as hard as I could to kill it. Turns out the spider was on the mirror. FML

#18013165
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15587) - you deserved it (28087)

On 10/18/2011 at 2:55am - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Missouri)

Today, I was asked if my bellybutton was an 'innie' or an 'outtie.' My bellybutton has been hidden by fat for so long that I couldn't remember. FML

#17922863
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9579) - you deserved it (34764)

On 10/06/2011 at 8:40pm - misc - by knzknz - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was asked if my bellybutton was an 'innie' or an 'outtie.' My bellybutton has been hidden by fat for so long that I couldn't remember. FML

#17922863
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9579) - you deserved it (34764)

On 10/06/2011 at 8:40pm - misc - by knzknz - Canada (Ontario)



FML's blog

  • Zoé's Illustrated FML
  • Hey there, young whippersnappers. Yes, you, the youth. I’m talking to you, sitting at home, scratching your asses. Why aren’t you doing something more constructive with your lives? Stop watching that shit…

Friday 18 April 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: