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f_all_our_lives's favorite FMLs
Today, I went to my school to take my yearbook picture. I was wearing a shirt that said ANALOG on the front. When I bent in to take the picture, part of my shirt overlapped itself. Now I'm known as the ANAL kid in the yearbook. FML
by boytoy / 09/02/2009 at 5:23pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was having lunch with my boyfriend and talking about how stressed out I've been because of my job. While I'm speaking, he pulls out his phone and says his boss is texting him and it was important. There was a game of Tetris reflecting onto his glasses from his phone. FML
by littlemissignored / 09/02/2009 at 3:17pm / United States (New Jersey) / Love
by Anonymous / 09/02/2009 at 1:38pm / United States (Michigan) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was turned down from my dream job at a graphic design firm. Before the interview, concerned about my hobo style would not impress the company, I shaved, cut my long hair, and even bought a suit. They said I wasn't "free-spirited and creative enough." FML
by hoboman / 09/02/2009 at 11:12am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Work
Today, I came home and found out that my new roommate, who smokes half a pack of cigarettes a day and drinks heavily 5 nights a week, had smashed my $300 bong because "weed is a horrible and deadly drug that will kill you slowly." FML
by expen_dable / 07/06/2009 at 1:55am / United States (New Hampshire) / Miscellaneous
by iloveZELOS / 07/05/2009 at 12:53am / United States / Money
Today, I planned a romantic dinner with rose petals, the whole lot, for my ex-girlfriend to win her back. When I took her to my house I told her to guess what I had planned, to which she replied "I hope it's not a stupid romantic dinner with rose petals and shit." FML
by ipopnlok / 06/29/2009 at 2:31am / Australia (Victoria) / Love
Today, I brought a friend who I have loved for years out to a nice restaurant for dinner. I ordered an expensive bottle of wine, and poured each of us a glass. As I was about to tell her I loved her, she raised her glass for a toast and said "A toast to friendship!" FML
by Anonymous / 06/25/2009 at 6:24pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Love
Today, I went to a yard sale and found a cute plush duck. I sent a pic of it to my friend with the message "Jackpot!" I guess she didn't see the pic because she called me up all excited, thinking my boyfriend of 6 years finally proposed to me. "No, I said, I just found a big duck for $1." FML
by smallmediumatlrg / 06/25/2009 at 3:17pm / United States (Florida) / Love
by Emptyspace / 06/25/2009 at 3:15pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous
by KN / 06/25/2009 at 10:13am / United States (Massachusetts) / Work
Today, after finishing work, my friend was having a party next door and my driveway was blocked. I parked 6 houses down and went to the party for 20mins. After coming out after 3 beers, I went to move my car back to my house and go to sleep. I got a DUI for driving 30 feet. FML
by Noj12345 / 06/25/2009 at 4:05am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
Today, was my first day back at work since my wife got breast cancer. I come in and see some people with pink slips and frowns. When I get to my desk I find a pink slip, I go up to my boss and start to curse him out for firing me. Only to find out my pink slip was a fundraiser for my wife. FML
by YahItsMe94 / 06/25/2009 at 3:20am / United States (New Jersey) / Miscellaneous
by FattyMcFatterson / 06/23/2009 at 10:37pm / United States (Alabama) / Health
Today, my car was impounded because I never registered it in California after moving here. In order to get it back, I need to register it. In order to register it, I need to pass a CA smog check. In order to pass the smog check, I need my car. FML
by nicklesg / 06/23/2009 at 7:05pm / United States (California) / Transportation
- 1Today, my parents let me babysit my baby sister for the first time. About an hour after they left,… 2Today, I saw an elderly lady fall over in the street. Nobody bothered to do anything, so I went… 3Today, I was fired for being late to work, even though the only reason I was late was because I had…