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expertsmilee

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expertsmilee

14Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 11 June 1991 (23 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1687
  • Number of comments : 159
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About expertsmilee : Leedaleedaleedalee

expertsmilee's page activity

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Liked!<b>rachelpayne18</b> - the 01/30/2015 at 2:16am<b>WeChaseClouds</b> - the 01/02/2015 at 4:21am<b>Nescology</b> - the 01/02/2015 at 3:21am<b>Noelletakumi</b> - the 01/01/2015 at 9:46pm<b>McDerpface</b> - the 12/26/2014 at 8:34pm<b>kantalita_claire</b> - the 10/24/2014 at 4:32am<b>juststephhere</b> - the 09/15/2014 at 12:52am

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In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

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expertsmilee's favorite FMLs

Today, I went to use the porta potty at the construction site I work at and found two homeless people having sex in it. I almost got fired, because my advisor blamed me. FML

#21264426
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (384) - you deserved it (2701)

On 09/24/2014 at 9:58am - work - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was checking my schedule online and noticed that I wasn't scheduled for any shifts next week. Not thinking it was a big deal, I called HR to get it corrected, only to find out I was laid off and they "forgot" to tell me. FML

#21254078
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37910) - you deserved it (2297)

On 09/07/2014 at 10:31pm - work - by soontobehobo (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, someone, and I still can't figure out who, switched my shampoo with mayonnaise. FML

#21249696
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38927) - you deserved it (3717)

On 09/01/2014 at 12:59pm - misc - by mayoshampoo - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I had to cancel my plans to go see my grandma, because I wasn't feeling too well. I called her to apologize, but she had trouble remembering who I was. When I told her my name, she said "Oh, the FAT one." Yes grandma, the fat one. FML

#21249110
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38934) - you deserved it (5057)

On 08/31/2014 at 3:27pm - kids - by TheFatOne - United States

Today, I won a gruelling fitness competition, only to find out the mystery prize was a voucher to get 10 free spray tans. I'm black. FML

#21249089
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48279) - you deserved it (3993)

On 08/31/2014 at 2:44pm - misc - by disappointedjamaican - United Kingdom (Coventry)

Today, I almost got lucky with a girl from my course. We've been flirting since we met. After removing her top and moving downwards with my tongue, whilst moaning my name she decided to mention she has a boyfriend and that we needed to stop. FML

#21248283
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49734) - you deserved it (5606)

On 08/30/2014 at 2:44am - intimacy - by Anonymous - New Zealand (Wellington)

Today, after my windshield wipers being stolen twice in a row, I decided to hide in my car to catch the thief. I fell asleep. When I woke up, the new wipers were gone. FML

#21246432
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37410) - you deserved it (8836)

On 08/27/2014 at 1:19pm - misc - by spark - United States (California)

Today, I witnessed my karate instructor whimper and practically piss himself as a guy walked up to him in the street and demanded his wallet. What a total waste of hundreds of dollars' worth of lessons. FML

#21244527
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33698) - you deserved it (3713)

On 08/24/2014 at 4:45pm - money - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, my boss chewed me out for correcting several spelling and grammar mistakes in one of his reports. The words "Think you're so damn smart, don't ya?" were uttered. I'm his secretary, and proofreading his shit is part of my job. FML

#21243125
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42335) - you deserved it (2677)

On 08/22/2014 at 12:56pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, my boss threatened to write me up, after I made a slightly rude joke about a coworker everyone hates. A while later, a colleague told me the same joke. Turns out my boss had gone around telling it to everyone else and taking all the credit. FML

#21242576
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38000) - you deserved it (4930)

On 08/21/2014 at 4:16pm - work - by jalisc512 (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I realized that my boyfriend is so obsessed with tickling me that my body has developed a conditioned response. Now I flinch every time he touches me, no matter what we're doing. FML

#21111720
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41251) - you deserved it (4062)

On 04/13/2014 at 5:33am - love - by Ticklish - United States (Iowa)

Today, I met my mom's new business partner for the first time. I shook his hand, and introduced myself as "Lisa's daughter". I'm a guy. FML

#21085066
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34529) - you deserved it (11769)

On 03/12/2014 at 6:23pm - work - by CurtisWogan (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, my boyfriend went down on me. I don't know why, but my mind wandered. He now thinks that he has the skills of a porn star, while I'm pretty sure that finally solving a mathematical problem I've been working on for a week caused me to orgasm. FML

#20963297
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50661) - you deserved it (8060)

On 11/19/2013 at 12:13pm - intimacy - by you+me-clothes=53>< (woman) - Austria (Wien)

Today, despite my fear of using public restrooms, I was forced to anyway to avoid my bladder exploding. I was finally getting over it when someone stuck their head under the stall to "see if someone's in there". I'm scared more now than I was before. FML

#20947778
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43929) - you deserved it (4612)

On 11/06/2013 at 2:09pm - misc - by s3xygrandpa (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I finally got to surprise my boyfriend with a birthday cake. I spent four days planning the perfect one. First thing he says? "Erm, you know I'm 32, right?" I got his age wrong. FML

#20937690
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28364) - you deserved it (32887)

On 10/29/2013 at 6:40am - misc - by Anonymous - Australia



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