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expertsmilee

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expertsmilee

28Fucked!

expertsmileeexpertsmilee
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 11 June 1991 (23 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1967
  • Number of comments : 165
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About expertsmilee : Leedaleedaleedalee

expertsmilee's page activity

Visits<b>dragonvale19</b> - 24 hours ago<b>Lilbrunswick7</b> - yesterday at 11:03am<b>FightMeNoodle</b> - yesterday at 10:53pm<b>mress2</b> - yesterday at 8:18pm<b>catherine012</b> - yesterday at 7:39pm<b>horseh</b> - the 04/23/2015 at 1:04am<b>unscrupulous</b> - the 04/22/2015 at 11:55pm<b>TheCookieComet</b> - the 04/22/2015 at 3:31pm<b>Sunflower1919</b> - the 04/22/2015 at 12:21am<b>_Heisenberg__</b> - the 04/21/2015 at 1:28pm<b>fiveforfighting</b> - the 04/21/2015 at 8:55am<b>CreepinCow</b> - the 04/20/2015 at 6:28pm<b>Nicolasaur726</b> - the 04/20/2015 at 5:09pm<b>tiwan</b> - the 04/19/2015 at 10:38pm<b>BI4ze</b> - the 04/19/2015 at 9:04pm<b>vicky_lynnnnn</b> - the 04/19/2015 at 4:20pm<b>it_happens06</b> - the 04/19/2015 at 1:01pm<b>Monday_funday</b> - the 04/19/2015 at 9:05am

Fucked!<b>elljoy</b> - the 04/19/2015 at 5:11am<b>Teckzilla</b> - the 04/18/2015 at 11:32pm<b>ScratchCatPower</b> - the 04/18/2015 at 11:03pm<b>sarcasm_insanity</b> - the 04/18/2015 at 9:31pm<b>patrickalamo</b> - the 04/10/2015 at 12:00am<b>haileyrows</b> - the 04/08/2015 at 10:25pm<b>asantos4</b> - the 04/07/2015 at 8:03am<b>adripadri</b> - the 04/07/2015 at 6:44am<b>horseh</b> - the 04/07/2015 at 5:41am<b>_kyleG_</b> - the 04/07/2015 at 3:26am<b>SecretSociety7</b> - the 04/06/2015 at 5:34pm<b>sh4rpestl1ves</b> - the 04/06/2015 at 5:03pm<b>C00kiesNcream</b> - the 04/06/2015 at 4:10pm<b>Zigstyle308</b> - the 04/06/2015 at 9:58am<b>brieee</b> - the 03/28/2015 at 6:41am<b>snarkytruth</b> - the 03/26/2015 at 5:35pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 03/26/2015 at 5:16pm<b>kikoma</b> - the 03/24/2015 at 11:17am

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You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.

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This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

Socialite

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expertsmilee's favorite FMLs

Today, I had to have a cervical biopsy. The doctor said I would feel slight cramping as she scraped cells from inside the cervix. I guess by "slight cramping" she meant I would shit, throw up, and then pass out. FML

#21395495
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29509) - you deserved it (1946)

On 04/17/2015 at 11:15pm - health - by khaoslife - United States (Kentucky)

Today, my fiancé freaked when he noticed the tattoo on my wrist, and demanded to know when I got it. It was two years before we even started dating. FML

#21395494
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26903) - you deserved it (2160)

On 04/17/2015 at 11:12pm - love - by pandapantsMD (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I found my first bra and tried it on. It still fits. FML

#21388113
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31168) - you deserved it (3274)

On 04/05/2015 at 3:18pm - misc - by Itsbeen8years (woman) - Slovakia (Bratislava)

Today, I came back from a week-long vacation where I had no internet whatsoever. I turned on my phone to get notifications, hoping to see a message or two that I'd missed while gone. There was 1 notification, telling me how many FMLs were posted while I was away. FML

#21388075
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29188) - you deserved it (2750)

On 04/05/2015 at 2:03pm - misc - by supercharged - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my parents, my aunt and her husband went out to dinner. There, my aunt told us that she was pregnant, and out of instinct, I asked her who the father is. FML

#21387788
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24757) - you deserved it (14661)

On 04/04/2015 at 11:06pm - kids - by TKPhai - United States (California)

Today, my dad and I were having a conversation about boneless chicken. He told me that they are raised boneless, going into detail, and I bought every word of it. Not until he started laughing did I realize how gullible I really am. I'm 22. FML

#21344889
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15234) - you deserved it (25603)

On 01/27/2015 at 12:43am - misc - by katrina2d (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, thinking he was being so hilarious, my friend slipped me enough laxatives to make a horse shit its intestines out. I haven't been able to move from the toilet for over an hour. FML

#21341346
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30997) - you deserved it (2430)

On 01/20/2015 at 11:29pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Arkansas)

Today, I had to negotiate with my husband so he would bring me toilet paper while I was on the john. His terms? A blowjob. FML

#21334864
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30562) - you deserved it (6394)

On 01/11/2015 at 12:56am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Washington)

Today, I was fired for "blatant, inexcusable racism". My boss had asked me which website background I preferred for our company, and I said that white backgrounds are usually best. He thinks that I believe in white supremacy, and that's bad for the company's image. FML

#21334747
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32084) - you deserved it (2358)

On 01/10/2015 at 10:02pm - work - by Jem (woman) - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, I was shopping with my dad and I saw one of my guy friends, so we waved and smiled at each other. My dad clearly thought his wave was too "romantic", because he shouted at him, "Touch her, and I'll kill you." FML

#21330296
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30540) - you deserved it (2794)

On 01/03/2015 at 10:56pm - misc - by Dear Lord Save Me (woman) - United Kingdom (Merthyr Tydfil)

Today, is the fourth day of my husband's and my new diet and exercise routine. I've already caught him eating junk food 4 times. He has lost 2 lbs and I've gained 3. FML

#21328280
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32529) - you deserved it (3681)

On 01/01/2015 at 12:50am - health - by hungry - United States

Today, my proposal to my girlfriend was supposed to be exactly when the ball dropped at midnight. Unfortunately my mother called her at 11:55pm to ask her if she liked the ring. FML

#21328278
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40861) - you deserved it (3226)

On 01/01/2015 at 12:47am - love - by Proposal Fail - United States (New York)

Today, I accidentally texted my mother instead of my drug dealer. FML

#21324443
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16778) - you deserved it (47862)

On 12/26/2014 at 12:39am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, my sister turned the volume on my phone way up and changed the ringtone to a woman's blood-curdling scream. I found this out when she called my phone at 2am as I slept next to it. I pissed my pants and fell out of bed screaming in terror. I'll never hear the end of this. FML

#21313211
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39050) - you deserved it (3996)

On 12/07/2014 at 3:54pm - kids - by terdberglerforlyfe (man) - Brazil (Sao Paulo)

Today, I snooped around my parents' room looking for hidden Christmas presents. The only hidden things I found was a whip, two ball gags, several other sex toys, and a load of newspaper clippings about the JFK assassination. What the fuck? FML

#21312961
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21246) - you deserved it (34031)

On 12/07/2014 at 3:10am - misc - by .__. (woman) - United Kingdom (Brent)



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