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expertsmilee

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expertsmilee

9Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 11 June 1991 (23 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1734
  • Number of comments : 159
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About expertsmilee : Leedaleedaleedalee

expertsmilee's page activity

Visits<b>kct101</b> - 16 hours ago<b>latinablanca</b> - 16 hours ago<b>kantalita_claire</b> - yesterday at 6:06pm<b>fatiezzhm</b> - the 03/02/2015 at 2:08pm<b>kylie31</b> - the 03/02/2015 at 7:12am<b>MARGIE9</b> - the 03/01/2015 at 9:59pm<b>420shankurnan_m8</b> - the 02/28/2015 at 2:20am<b>firecracker5</b> - the 02/27/2015 at 1:16pm<b>katebond</b> - the 02/24/2015 at 2:36pm<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 02/23/2015 at 10:35pm<b>symfora</b> - the 02/20/2015 at 11:18am<b>iPixiee</b> - the 02/20/2015 at 5:24am<b>iAmPaul</b> - the 02/18/2015 at 11:23am<b>wookieewhosshe</b> - the 02/17/2015 at 5:31am<b>lola4455</b> - the 02/17/2015 at 12:00am<b>stuckintime</b> - the 02/16/2015 at 12:33pm<b>CinematicKid</b> - the 02/14/2015 at 3:01pm<b>BananaSantos</b> - the 02/13/2015 at 11:20pm

Liked!<b>kylie31</b> - the 02/28/2015 at 12:07am<b>iAmPaul</b> - the 02/18/2015 at 5:23pm<b>rachelpayne18</b> - the 01/30/2015 at 2:16am<b>WeChaseClouds</b> - the 01/02/2015 at 4:21am<b>Nescology</b> - the 01/02/2015 at 3:21am<b>Noelletakumi</b> - the 01/01/2015 at 9:46pm<b>McDerpface</b> - the 12/26/2014 at 8:34pm<b>kantalita_claire</b> - the 10/24/2014 at 4:32am<b>juststephhere</b> - the 09/15/2014 at 12:52am

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expertsmilee's favorite FMLs

Today, my dad and I were having a conversation about boneless chicken. He told me that they are raised boneless, going into detail, and I bought every word of it. Not until he started laughing did I realize how gullible I really am. I'm 22. FML

#21344889
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15217) - you deserved it (25559)

On 01/27/2015 at 12:43am - misc - by katrina2d (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, thinking he was being so hilarious, my friend slipped me enough laxatives to make a horse shit its intestines out. I haven't been able to move from the toilet for over an hour. FML

#21341346
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30937) - you deserved it (2427)

On 01/20/2015 at 11:29pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Arkansas)

Today, I had to negotiate with my husband so he would bring me toilet paper while I was on the john. His terms? A blowjob. FML

#21334864
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30483) - you deserved it (6386)

On 01/11/2015 at 12:56am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Washington)

Today, I was fired for "blatant, inexcusable racism". My boss had asked me which website background I preferred for our company, and I said that white backgrounds are usually best. He thinks that I believe in white supremacy, and that's bad for the company's image. FML

#21334747
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32042) - you deserved it (2354)

On 01/10/2015 at 10:02pm - work - by Jem (woman) - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, I was shopping with my dad and I saw one of my guy friends, so we waved and smiled at each other. My dad clearly thought his wave was too "romantic", because he shouted at him, "Touch her, and I'll kill you." FML

#21330296
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30546) - you deserved it (2787)

On 01/03/2015 at 10:56pm - misc - by Dear Lord Save Me (woman) - United Kingdom (Merthyr Tydfil)

Today, is the fourth day of my husband's and my new diet and exercise routine. I've already caught him eating junk food 4 times. He has lost 2 lbs and I've gained 3. FML

#21328280
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31016) - you deserved it (3385)

On 01/01/2015 at 12:50am - health - by hungry - United States

Today, my proposal to my girlfriend was supposed to be exactly when the ball dropped at midnight. Unfortunately my mother called her at 11:55pm to ask her if she liked the ring. FML

#21328278
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40792) - you deserved it (3222)

On 01/01/2015 at 12:47am - love - by Proposal Fail - United States (New York)

Today, I accidentally texted my mother instead of my drug dealer. FML

#21324443
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16766) - you deserved it (47761)

On 12/26/2014 at 12:39am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, my sister turned the volume on my phone way up and changed the ringtone to a woman's blood-curdling scream. I found this out when she called my phone at 2am as I slept next to it. I pissed my pants and fell out of bed screaming in terror. I'll never hear the end of this. FML

#21313211
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37822) - you deserved it (3615)

On 12/07/2014 at 3:54pm - kids - by terdberglerforlyfe (man) - Brazil (Sao Paulo)

Today, I snooped around my parents' room looking for hidden Christmas presents. The only hidden things I found was a whip, two ball gags, several other sex toys, and a load of newspaper clippings about the JFK assassination. What the fuck? FML

#21312961
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21227) - you deserved it (33984)

On 12/07/2014 at 3:10am - misc - by .__. (woman) - United Kingdom (Brent)

Today, my boss at my new call center job said he'd gotten complaints about me. Apparently I sound "too black" and it's "upsetting" some of our customers. I don't know what that even means, but my boss said I need to "tone it down or we're gonna have some problems". FML

#21310827
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35763) - you deserved it (3215)

On 12/03/2014 at 4:21pm - work - by WTF - United States (Texas)

Today, I came home late from work. As I got out of my car, I noticed a child-shaped silhouette in my bedroom window. I almost shat myself, since I live alone. I searched the whole house, sobbing in fear, only to find no trace of whatever or whoever I'd seen. FML

#21306286
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38257) - you deserved it (3158)

On 11/26/2014 at 3:45pm - misc - by void bowels() { cry(); } (man) - United Kingdom (Caerphilly)

Today, I walked into the kitchen at the exact moment my uncle decided to bend over in short shorts. Apparently, his ballsack decided it needed extra room, because it dangled out of his pant leg. FML

#21283844
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35828) - you deserved it (2931)

On 10/23/2014 at 4:05pm - misc - by Alexismaria - United States

Today, I was at the mall with my young daughter. I hate pooping in public but I really had to go so I brought her in with me. Thinking we were alone, I started to go and my daughter yelled, "Good job, mommy, you're using the potty like a big girl!" I then heard laughing. FML

#21283795
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35929) - you deserved it (4425)

On 10/23/2014 at 2:43pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I didn't make dinner fast enough so somebody had a yelling and screaming temper tantrum. It would be understandable if the person who threw the tantrum was a child, and not my 57-year-old father. FML

#21283737
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30185) - you deserved it (2452)

On 10/23/2014 at 11:56am - misc - by mnote (man) - United States (Oklahoma)



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