Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

evilraider

Search for a member

evilraider
  • Town/Country : irvine, USA
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 179
  • Number of comments : 28
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About evilraider : Evil raider

evilraider's last visitors

ireply_wlyricsjellybeensMikaykayUnicornAprylAnnSkarkie321Smeelover27

evilraider's FML badges

Profile completed

You’ve filled out the necessary details. Having done so will be much appreciated.

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

See all of evilraider's badges

evilraider's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend called me pretty. Not because he actually thinks I'm pretty, but because "Hey, how else is a guy supposed to get laid?" FML

#20754112
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51065) - you deserved it (6095)

On 06/29/2013 at 11:09am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my boyfriend and I had a threesome. He suggested we have another guy. It ended up devolving into a twosome, and I wasn't part of it. FML

#20740333
195 comments

I agree, your life sucks (72251) - you deserved it (16404)

On 06/22/2013 at 2:39am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I attempted to ask a girl out by doing a flash mob and singing for her in the store where she works. Turns out, she suffers from anxiety and the overwhelming amount of attention caused a panic attack. No, I didn't get a date. FML

#20733111
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43355) - you deserved it (17226)

On 06/18/2013 at 11:02am - love - by Well, crap (man) - Denmark (Nordjylland)

Today, I walked into the living room, only to find my brother wanking off to an episode of My Little Pony. FML

#20726036
241 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58791) - you deserved it (5832)

On 06/14/2013 at 6:29pm - intimacy - by bestiality, not even once (woman) - Ireland (Waterford)

Today, I ran the mile in gym class. I was the second to last person to finish, and I was left panting and feeling faint. When the teacher found out I hadn't come in dead last, he accused me of skipping a lap and is now making me rerun the entire thing. FML

#20721311
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53824) - you deserved it (4994)

On 06/12/2013 at 10:56am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, after years of researching and saving money, I got a pet fox. I was able to enjoy the majesty of the animal for three hours before it burrowed under the fence and ran away. FML

#20717566
311 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31737) - you deserved it (47120)

On 06/10/2013 at 2:01pm - animals - by SadFoxLady (woman) - United States (Iowa)

Today, I finished a big art project. It was a self-portrait done in acrylics. Proud of my piece, I showed my mom. After some thought her first comment was, "well, I'm either going to insult your art or your face." FML

#20698927
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43296) - you deserved it (4336)

On 06/01/2013 at 7:43am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my parents told me they're glad I'm an "ugly nerd" because they don't have to worry about me getting into trouble or having a teen pregnancy. FML

#20686197
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45104) - you deserved it (3905)

On 05/25/2013 at 8:45pm - misc - by uglynerd (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was stuck in my apartment complex's elevator. I was shouting out for help when a voice came screaming, "This is the fire department." I was relieved until he said, "Just kidding." FML

#20681121
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43363) - you deserved it (2773)

On 05/23/2013 at 1:11am - misc - by Mylifesucks - United States (Kentucky)

Today, my house was damaged by a tornado. I called my mother to see if I could stay with her for a few days. Her response? "I warned you not to move in with a man. This is God's way of punishing you." I've been married to said man for almost a year now. FML

#20676306
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38550) - you deserved it (2402)

On 05/20/2013 at 8:37pm - misc - by hotelbound - United States (Missouri)

Today, I brought my girlfriend home for the first time. I was really excited to introduce her to my parents, until we found my mother waving around a wooden sword, and my father trying to shove my sister into the dryer. FML

#20671220
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43067) - you deserved it (4604)

On 05/18/2013 at 4:06pm - love - by Mr_poole (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, my 55 year-old mother faked a pregnancy because she was jealous of all the attention I've been getting since I had my twin boys. FML

#20663345
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42984) - you deserved it (2431)

On 05/14/2013 at 5:35pm - misc - by for the love of god (woman) - United States

Today, I went into the men's restroom and started peeing in a urinal next to a middle-age man. As he zipped up and walked away, he said to me, "Don't worry, it'll grow." FML

#20663182
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38608) - you deserved it (3763)

On 05/14/2013 at 4:09pm - health - by DrewK (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I woke up to my friend stroking my face with the bottom of his foot and whispering, "Shh, you're okay." FML

#20661280
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34787) - you deserved it (3426)

On 05/13/2013 at 6:05pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Hawaii)

Today, a woman approached me in the street and slapped me, ranting about how I stole her man. I don't even know her man, or her, and I live over a thousand miles away in Scotland. I'm back in town for the first time since my childhood to attend a wedding. FML

#20661106
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45172) - you deserved it (2798)

On 05/13/2013 at 4:36pm - misc - by culodegrillo (woman) - Spain



FML's blog

  • Zoé's Illustrated FML
  • Hey there, young whippersnappers. Yes, you, the youth. I’m talking to you, sitting at home, scratching your asses. Why aren’t you doing something more constructive with your lives? Stop watching that shit…

Friday 18 April 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: