evilamoebaattack

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evilamoebaattack

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evilamoebaattack
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Friday 2 August 1996 (19 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 3055
  • Number of comments : 92
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 7 posted

About evilamoebaattack : gah.

evilamoebaattack's page activity

Visits<b>sexyboi1985</b> - the 04/19/2016 at 11:34pm<b>TheNight</b> - the 04/05/2016 at 10:26pm<b>jill97</b> - the 02/23/2016 at 10:48pm<b>niftyismybitch</b> - the 02/22/2016 at 6:53am<b>Fertil14</b> - the 02/21/2016 at 9:25pm<b>stuckintime</b> - the 02/19/2016 at 11:26pm<b>lunar999</b> - the 02/01/2016 at 11:08am<b>paigexox0</b> - the 01/11/2016 at 4:05pm<b>karacakal2</b> - the 01/09/2016 at 7:31pm<b>kemosabe4201</b> - the 11/30/2015 at 4:40am<b>ArchxAngel</b> - the 11/26/2015 at 8:02pm<b>barisozdemir</b> - the 11/25/2015 at 4:33am<b>Envy22</b> - the 11/25/2015 at 12:22am<b>a3gab</b> - the 11/23/2015 at 7:31am<b>bigmusclebro</b> - the 11/07/2015 at 7:45pm<b>sheeshadevil</b> - the 11/02/2015 at 1:49am<b>mongoosemike</b> - the 10/25/2015 at 4:25pm<b>Chandrashekar</b> - the 10/16/2015 at 10:55pm

Fucked!<b>sexyboi1985</b> - the 04/20/2016 at 4:46am<b>karacakal2</b> - the 01/10/2016 at 1:31am<b>ArchxAngel</b> - the 11/27/2015 at 2:02am<b>barisozdemir</b> - the 11/25/2015 at 10:33am<b>keiNan</b> - the 09/21/2015 at 8:06pm<b>Steve95401</b> - the 04/15/2015 at 1:12pm<b>martin8337</b> - the 03/30/2015 at 4:22am<b>Cozy_Blanket</b> - the 03/15/2015 at 12:33pm<b>saraitkddh</b> - the 03/14/2015 at 10:48pm<b>Dick_diamond</b> - the 03/05/2015 at 3:16am<b>Chelserser</b> - the 03/04/2015 at 8:04am<b>lukian</b> - the 12/27/2014 at 10:21pm<b>robertd73</b> - the 10/27/2014 at 1:38pm

evilamoebaattack's FML badges

What'cha looking at?

You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

See all of evilamoebaattack's badges

evilamoebaattack's favorite FMLs

Today, my daughter asked me the difference between "their" and "they're". This is the same child I've been spending thousands of dollars on to send to law school. FML

by Anonymous / 02/26/2014 at 4:42pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Kids

Today, I walked into my apartment and smelled something extremely repugnant. I asked my roommate what had happened and she said, "I didn't know how else to kill it!" She'd trapped a bat that was in our apartment, put it in the oven, and set it to 400 degrees. FML

by BakedBat / 02/20/2014 at 11:10pm / United States (Minnesota) / Miscellaneous

Today, I shut one of my breasts in my car door. FML

by Anonymous / 01/18/2014 at 1:29am / United States (Colorado) / Miscellaneous

Today, my mother told her friends that I work as a call girl. I'm a call center agent. FML

by Anonymous / 12/11/2013 at 5:25pm / Luxembourg / Work

Today, I was staying at a seedy apartment. A group of drunken idiots next door decided it would be fun to run into the wall simultaneously. They broke through the rotted wall and ran me over. FML

by unlucky neighbors / 12/06/2013 at 4:36am / China (Shanghai) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was staying at a seedy apartment. A group of drunken idiots next door decided it would be fun to run into the wall simultaneously. They broke through the rotted wall and ran me over. FML

by unlucky neighbors / 12/06/2013 at 4:36am / China (Shanghai) / Miscellaneous

Today, my neighbor brought a ruined napkin holder over and claimed that we drilled a hole through his wall and ruined it. I apologized, not telling him that it was actually a bullet that my boyfriend shot through the wall. FML

by Anonymous / 11/29/2013 at 12:53am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I turned 30. While all my friends are getting married, furthering careers and having children, I'm still sat around being as immature as I was as a teenager. I'm going through a classic case of premature age-jaculation. I laughed for 10 minutes after coming up with that. FML

Today, my boyfriend and I decided to try flavored condoms. I guess I enjoyed them a little too much; I almost choked half to death on a strawberry cockcicle. FML

by flavored / 11/18/2013 at 10:26am / United States / Intimacy

Today, I got my two-year-old's Halloween costume in the mail. I tried it on him to make sure it fit. He loves it so much that he is now having a complete meltdown because he wants to go trick-or-treating. He doesn't understand we only go trick-or-treating on Halloween. 23 more days to go. FML

Today, I got my two-year-old's Halloween costume in the mail. I tried it on him to make sure it fit. He loves it so much that he is now having a complete meltdown because he wants to go trick-or-treating. He doesn't understand we only go trick-or-treating on Halloween. 23 more days to go. FML

Today, I got kicked out of English class shortly after our teacher told us we have to write an essay on how the storyline of Harry Potter is one big allegory for "the futility of socialism." Apparently, reacting with disbelief makes me a "disruptive influence." FML

by WTF? / 10/03/2013 at 12:42pm / United States (New Mexico) / Miscellaneous

Today, I told my boyfriend I loved him. He told me he was a dinosaur. FML

by Kit / 09/16/2013 at 7:09am / United Kingdom (Swindon) / Love

Today, I saw an elderly gentleman in the street wearing a shirt with a big QR code on it. Amused, I used an app on my phone to decode it. It gave me a shortened web address, which I followed, only to be faced with a picture of the same gentleman naked, grinning, and giving a thumbs up. FML

by Anonymous / 09/15/2013 at 3:53pm / Romania (Bucuresti) / Intimacy

Today, I found out that if I say "make a sandwich", it doesn't matter what context it's in, or whether it's a command or just me describing my day; I'll be yelled at anyway by my hipster roommate for being a "sexist cunt", then end up apologizing just to get her to shut up. FML

by Anonymous / 09/05/2013 at 3:11pm / United States (Minnesota) / Miscellaneous