Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

evilamoebaattack

Offline (the 07/28/2015 at 7:56pm) | Search for a member

evilamoebaattack

8Fucked!

evilamoebaattack
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Friday 2 August 1996 (18 years)
  • <3 status : Not so sure
  • Number of visits : 2215
  • Number of comments : 92
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 7 posted

About evilamoebaattack : gah.

evilamoebaattack's page activity

Visits<b>mds9986</b> - the 07/24/2015 at 3:21am<b>Cads1</b> - the 07/04/2015 at 6:09am<b>generic_use_999</b> - the 06/13/2015 at 3:27am<b>DFMLharsh</b> - the 06/03/2015 at 5:01pm<b>Kallian</b> - the 06/01/2015 at 3:01am<b>RedPillSucks</b> - the 06/01/2015 at 1:45am<b>terryaly</b> - the 05/28/2015 at 12:13am<b>hiiamahuskey</b> - the 05/27/2015 at 2:07pm<b>OochenSnoochen</b> - the 05/24/2015 at 1:20pm<b>flyingmind</b> - the 05/22/2015 at 10:47am<b>killer0689</b> - the 05/12/2015 at 6:30am<b>prajju99</b> - the 05/12/2015 at 12:51am<b>jennaclaire13</b> - the 05/06/2015 at 8:07am<b>Edogg215</b> - the 05/05/2015 at 6:46pm<b>StunninW</b> - the 04/17/2015 at 8:18pm<b>martin8337</b> - the 04/17/2015 at 9:16am<b>FallenFables</b> - the 04/16/2015 at 1:09am<b>angieydg</b> - the 04/15/2015 at 6:53pm

Fucked!<b>Steve95401</b> - the 04/15/2015 at 1:12pm<b>martin8337</b> - the 03/30/2015 at 4:22am<b>Cozy_Blanket</b> - the 03/15/2015 at 12:33pm<b>saraitkddh</b> - the 03/14/2015 at 10:48pm<b>Dick_diamond</b> - the 03/05/2015 at 3:16am<b>Chelserser</b> - the 03/04/2015 at 8:04am<b>lukian</b> - the 12/27/2014 at 10:21pm<b>robertd73</b> - the 10/27/2014 at 1:38pm

evilamoebaattack's FML badges

What'cha looking at?

You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

See all of evilamoebaattack's badges

evilamoebaattack's favorite FMLs

Today, I walked into my apartment and smelled something extremely repugnant. I asked my roommate what had happened and she said, "I didn't know how else to kill it!" She'd trapped a bat that was in our apartment, put it in the oven, and set it to 400 degrees. FML

#21067130
281 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51406) - you deserved it (4175)

On 02/20/2014 at 11:10pm - misc - by BakedBat (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I shut one of my breasts in my car door. FML

#21031414
181 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51465) - you deserved it (9647)

On 01/18/2014 at 1:29am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, my mother told her friends that I work as a call girl. I'm a call center agent. FML

#20989169
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38055) - you deserved it (2990)

On 12/11/2013 at 5:25pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - Luxembourg

Today, I was staying at a seedy apartment. A group of drunken idiots next door decided it would be fun to run into the wall simultaneously. They broke through the rotted wall and ran me over. FML

#20982547
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41504) - you deserved it (3052)

On 12/06/2013 at 4:36am - misc - by unlucky neighbors - China (Shanghai)

Today, I was staying at a seedy apartment. A group of drunken idiots next door decided it would be fun to run into the wall simultaneously. They broke through the rotted wall and ran me over. FML

#20982547
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41504) - you deserved it (3052)

On 12/06/2013 at 4:36am - misc - by unlucky neighbors - China (Shanghai)

Today, my neighbor brought a ruined napkin holder over and claimed that we drilled a hole through his wall and ruined it. I apologized, not telling him that it was actually a bullet that my boyfriend shot through the wall. FML

#20974338
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23725) - you deserved it (37629)

On 11/29/2013 at 12:53am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I turned 30. While all my friends are getting married, furthering careers and having children, I'm still sat around being as immature as I was as a teenager. I'm going through a classic case of premature age-jaculation. I laughed for 10 minutes after coming up with that. FML

Today, my boyfriend and I decided to try flavored condoms. I guess I enjoyed them a little too much; I almost choked half to death on a strawberry cockcicle. FML

#20961988
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44697) - you deserved it (18049)

On 11/18/2013 at 10:26am - intimacy - by flavored (woman) - United States

Today, I got my two-year-old's Halloween costume in the mail. I tried it on him to make sure it fit. He loves it so much that he is now having a complete meltdown because he wants to go trick-or-treating. He doesn't understand we only go trick-or-treating on Halloween. 23 more days to go. FML

Today, I got my two-year-old's Halloween costume in the mail. I tried it on him to make sure it fit. He loves it so much that he is now having a complete meltdown because he wants to go trick-or-treating. He doesn't understand we only go trick-or-treating on Halloween. 23 more days to go. FML

Today, I got kicked out of English class shortly after our teacher told us we have to write an essay on how the storyline of Harry Potter is one big allegory for "the futility of socialism." Apparently, reacting with disbelief makes me a "disruptive influence." FML

#20905920
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34238) - you deserved it (3516)

On 10/03/2013 at 12:42pm - misc - by WTF? (man) - United States (New Mexico)

Today, I told my boyfriend I loved him. He told me he was a dinosaur. FML

#20883504
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43979) - you deserved it (5577)

On 09/16/2013 at 7:09am - love - by Kit (woman) - United Kingdom (Swindon)

Today, I saw an elderly gentleman in the street wearing a shirt with a big QR code on it. Amused, I used an app on my phone to decode it. It gave me a shortened web address, which I followed, only to be faced with a picture of the same gentleman naked, grinning, and giving a thumbs up. FML

#20882561
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58386) - you deserved it (29093)

On 09/15/2013 at 3:53pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Romania (Bucuresti)

Today, I found out that if I say "make a sandwich", it doesn't matter what context it's in, or whether it's a command or just me describing my day; I'll be yelled at anyway by my hipster roommate for being a "sexist cunt", then end up apologizing just to get her to shut up. FML

#20868968
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37715) - you deserved it (5383)

On 09/05/2013 at 3:11pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, my boyfriend gave me the painting he had been working on. It was a heart with wings, my name, and the date we started dating. We have been dating for almost a year and a half. He misspelled my name. FML

#20854112
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41594) - you deserved it (4580)

On 08/25/2013 at 7:30pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Kansas)



FML's blog

  • Feeling shitty? Write to Auntie Bernie!
  • It's a new summer, so here's a new feature. OK, that doesn't mean much, but you've got to start somewhere. The idea came from the fact that we get sent a lot of FMLs that touch us, in our heart of…

Friday 24 July 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: