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Today, my mom threw out years worth of trophies that I'd put tons of effort into earning. Her reason? They all looked the same to her. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22792) - you deserved it (1791)
On 08/15/2011 at 7:09pm - misc - by Facepalm (man) - United States (California)
Today, my boyfriend showed me his penis for the first time. All I could think to say was, "That's a clean circumcision." FML
I agree, your life sucks (21874) - you deserved it (6059)
On 08/06/2011 at 2:35am - intimacy - by plantfood - United States
Today, even though I made the point of tanning naked, I still got tan lines thanks to my fat rolls. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11606) - you deserved it (36194)
On 08/05/2011 at 3:06pm - health - by Username - United States
Today, I went bowling with my parents. This cute guy works there and he always flirts with me. My mom just so happened to see it today. As we left, she says to him "You know she's 13, right?" I'm 17. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32887) - you deserved it (2131)
On 08/03/2011 at 2:01am - love - by Michelle - United States (Maryland)
Today, at some point, and for some reason I'll probably never fully understand, it seemed like a good idea to get completely shitfaced on tequila and try to shave my ballsack with a straight razor. I'm not sure if these wounds will ever heal. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9535) - you deserved it (49907)
On 08/01/2011 at 5:47pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (California)
Today, I gave my dad a brochure for anger management. His response? Throwing a chair out the window. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29977) - you deserved it (6358)
On 07/28/2011 at 11:25am - health - by 99520 - United States (Indiana)
Today, I had to do a "damage report" on myself after going to the midnight premiere of Harry Potter. As I was waiting for the previews, a 20 year old man dressed as a house elf tackled and wrestled me for my seat. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21081) - you deserved it (3606)
On 07/15/2011 at 1:01pm - health - by beachbumb8538 - United States
Today, my daughter announced on Facebook that she is directly descended from extra-terrestrials. That would be okay - except she's 25 and believes it's true. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21350) - you deserved it (3062)
On 07/11/2011 at 12:23am - kids - by MotherofET (woman) - Australia (Queensland)
Today, I realized I have no life after I created a fake Facebook account, posted an insulting message on my wall, and then engaged in a vicious argument with it, just so I could impress my friends. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8607) - you deserved it (38685)
On 07/08/2011 at 10:57am - misc - by jen - United States (North Carolina)
Today, while at the beach, I was mistaken for Snooki. FML
I agree, your life sucks (39933) - you deserved it (18572)
On 07/07/2011 at 11:12am - misc - by Unknown - United States (Missouri)
Today, my roommate showed me that her pepper spray had expired, so I decided to test it on myself. It worked. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7056) - you deserved it (64788)
On 07/06/2011 at 2:45pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (New York)
Today, I got cock-blocked by the laundry. My boyfriend was the one who wanted to do laundry. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20603) - you deserved it (3109)
On 07/04/2011 at 12:09pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, my son called me from medical school, asking for a new phone. Why? Because he dropped it in the toilet. How? Trying to videotape his anus while taking a dump. I pay $80,000 a year just to hear he took a dump on his phone. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33197) - you deserved it (4969)
On 07/03/2011 at 9:50pm - intimacy - by WasteOMoney - United States (Texas)
Today, my dad spent a full half hour trying to convince me that Judaism is a race. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19409) - you deserved it (4501)
On 07/01/2011 at 6:02pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)
Today, I ran to my car and zoomed to work to avoid being late. I was in such a hurry, I forgot to close all my windows. When I got back to my car, I found a dead squirrel inside. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17641) - you deserved it (6020)
On 07/01/2011 at 3:22pm - animals - by anon - United States (Michigan)
Monday 17 June 2013
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