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eustonr

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eustonr

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Saturday 19 February 1966 (48 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 215
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About eustonr : An Australian living in the UK, with my lovely wife, and annoying children.

eustonr's page activity

Visits<b>aWeirdoNamedCori</b> - the 07/29/2013 at 1:26pm<b>Fmlano</b> - the 07/16/2013 at 10:02pm<b>Batgirl124</b> - the 06/30/2013 at 5:11pm<b>RecAr</b> - the 06/30/2013 at 12:25am<b>golden_warrior</b> - the 06/29/2013 at 7:33pm<b>Nordrag</b> - the 06/28/2013 at 4:43pm

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eustonr's favorite FMLs

Today, I had to take my cat to the vet. On the way there, he managed to get out of his cage, climb into the front seat, onto my chest, and howl in my face as I tried to drive down the highway. I ended up with stitches and still got charged for missing my cat's appointment. FML

#21216576
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38158) - you deserved it (4919)

On 07/21/2014 at 6:49pm - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, while I was making dinner, my husband argued that our new dog has intelligence issues, and we should give him away. I angrily defended the poor thing, and had almost won, until the dog walked over and licked the inside of the hot oven door. FML

#21126864
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42349) - you deserved it (5544)

On 04/30/2014 at 1:17am - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I'm moving from Arizona to Washington State with my 2 cats in my car. I've only just left and just learned that one cat gets carsick and the other stress farts. Only 956 more miles to go. FML

#20962468
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42063) - you deserved it (5719)

On 11/18/2013 at 6:47pm - animals - by Catcrap! - United States (California)

Today, I heard crashing noises coming from my dining room. I got up to see what it was; my asshat cat was flinging himself at my chandelier. He'd figured out how to grab the ceiling fan from the other room, build momentum, and launch into my expensive chandelier. Hooray. FML

#20929956
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45075) - you deserved it (4770)

On 10/22/2013 at 5:12am - animals - by IamAflyingCat - United States

Today, I was home alone and heard the kitchen tap turn on. Shocked, I turned it off. It continuously kept turning itself on so I set my video phone on it to find out the cause. My cat has learnt to turn it on. I later found said cat teaching another. I have three cats. All my taps are like this. FML

Today, a week after my dad discovered Family Guy and started mindlessly repeating catchphrases from it 24/7, I finally lost my temper and told him how incredibly annoying it is. He just paused, turned to look me in the eyes, and said, "Shut up, Meg." FML

#20870528
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51526) - you deserved it (18760)

On 09/06/2013 at 6:56pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I went on a new medicine. One of the listed side-effects was "anal seepage" and I spent the better part of the day laughing with my coworkers about how it's "not a real side-effect". I found out that it really is while stuck in bumper-to-bumper traffic on the way home. FML

#20839551
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39030) - you deserved it (9237)

On 08/15/2013 at 11:18pm - health - by stinky car - United States (Alabama)

Today, I watched TV in the early morning. I was watching The Ring, and when the scene came on where the girl is crawling out of the TV, my dad grabbed my shoulders from behind me out of nowhere, causing me to shriek like a little bitch. I don't know how long he waited to do that. FML

#20838885
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42785) - you deserved it (7703)

On 08/15/2013 at 3:56pm - misc - by insomniac x2 (woman) - Mexico (Nuevo Leon)

Today, I found my elderly neighbour on all fours in my garden eating my flowers. FML

#20836671
111 comments

Today, I returned from a long business trip a day early to surprise my wife. She was sleeping, so I climbed into bed and started spooning her. Thinking I was an intruder, she simultaneously kicked me in the groin, elbowed me in the ribs, and smacked the back of her head into my jaw. FML

#20805942
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43481) - you deserved it (24576)

On 07/27/2013 at 4:03am - love - by good_aim (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was on a bus and I was so exhausted that I fell asleep. According to a few other passengers, I nestled into the chest of the guy next to me, and hit him every time he made a noise. FML

#20795078
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41650) - you deserved it (9011)

On 07/21/2013 at 12:45am - misc - by accountnamevalid (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, trying to be funny in front of some friends, I held my cat above my head Lion King style. The height must have made him nervous, because he shat on my head. FML

#20788265
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27909) - you deserved it (49793)

On 07/17/2013 at 12:02pm - animals - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, while on the airplane, the cute girl next to me and I instantly hit it off. When I excused myself to the bathroom, I must have given her the wrong impression. She wanted to join the mile high club; I just wanted to take a crap. FML

#20781742
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58391) - you deserved it (12233)

On 07/14/2013 at 6:41am - intimacy - by mile high clubber - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my driving instructor failed me on my test, because I forgot to turn the air conditioning off after parking. FML

#20780305
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60312) - you deserved it (5398)

On 07/13/2013 at 4:40pm - misc - by WOW (man) - Kenya

Today, I was browsing porn in my room, when my dad barged in. I quickly switched to another tab, only to see it was parked on another porn page. I had another browser window open, so I switched to that. More porn. My dad said, "Riiiggghhhttt... You need help, son." FML

#20779957
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27572) - you deserved it (54162)

On 07/13/2013 at 1:22pm - misc - by fuck (man) - United Kingdom (Surrey)



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