About ethan_unoxx : I love Saturday Night Live. A lot.
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ethan_unoxx's favorite FMLs
Today, at the register, I got a spontaneous nose bleed. The lady behind the counter apparently didn't do well with blood. Her face turned white, she passed out and fell with her head on the counter. FML
by unluckysamaritan / 10/15/2016 at 4:51am / Sweden (Skane Lan) / Miscellaneous
by faeliality / 10/15/2016 at 1:54am / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, my girlfriend of five months told me that she had booked us reservations to our town's Halloween barbecue party. When I reminded her that I'm vegan, she told me she specifically got the reservations to help me to quit my "stupid fad". Weird, I never knew being a devout Hindu was a fad. FML
by Cow lover / 10/12/2016 at 10:13am / United States (New York) / Love
Today I bought a 50$ voucher card to refill my phone. After I purchased it, I threw the receipt in the dustbin. When I got home, I found out that the 14-digit pin code was on the receipt. I basically threw 57 bucks in the dustbin. FML
by Iris / 10/12/2016 at 9:53am / Canada (Quebec) / Money
by lululand315 / 10/11/2016 at 10:40am / United States (District of Columbia) / Money
by mermaidkeels / 10/10/2016 at 9:44am / United States (Florida) / Love
by TooPoorForPrivateUni / 10/09/2016 at 12:18pm / United Kingdom (Merton) / Money
Today, I got my new smartwatch that I ordered for myself on the promise that I would use it for tracking my new exercise routine. Instead, I used it for playing Pong whilst eating cake and drinking wine. FML
by TomorrowMaybe / 10/08/2016 at 12:29pm / Denmark (Sjelland) / Health
by Anonymous / 10/08/2016 at 9:20am / United States (Virginia) / Intimacy
Today, I finally bought my first car after saving around £5000 and finding an absolute bargain that ticked all the boxes! Today was also the day of my first ever car accident, resulting in the car being written off by an uninsured driver. I had it less than 9 hours. FML
by One_wheel_wonder / 10/06/2016 at 11:36am / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Transportation
Today, I was syphoning some gas from my truck to my friend's car just enough to get to the gas station. I told my friend to let me know when the gas was coming; he said, "Alright." Suddenly, I got a mouth full of gas because he was on his phone taking a video of me. He got the whole thing. FML
by crazytortise / 10/05/2016 at 10:40pm / United States / Transportation
by Roommate / 09/28/2016 at 12:03pm / United States (Washington) / Miscellaneous
Today, I secured a tender for my boss, earning her 1/4 million in profits. Today is also meant to be pay-day for us, but my boss is too busy dealing with the tender to pay her employees. So essentially, I made my boss rich while remaining broke and in debt. FML
by SoDamnBroke / 09/28/2016 at 9:13am / South Africa / Money
Today, my boyfriend and I wanted to kayak. On the way, I told him I had to go back to our hotel because I needed the bathroom and didn't want a public one to smell. Once back in the elevator at the hotel, it got stuck. For an hour. I pooped myself and had to wait 40 minutes after that for help. FML
by ItWasOurAnniversary / 09/28/2016 at 8:08am / Australia / Health
- 1Today, my boyfriend said I didn't give him enough attention because of my busy work life. So… he… 2Today, I was making the daily commute to work when suddenly my mother calls me, crying that there's… 3Today, my boyfriend presented me with a 30-minute montage video of him working out and flexing his…