About esluvjay : I am simply AMAZINGGGGGGG!!!!!!!!!
esluvjay's FML badges
You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.
You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.
Up and coming moderator
It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.
esluvjay's favorite FMLs
by Anonymous / 12/21/2011 at 12:47pm / United States (Oregon) / Miscellaneous
Today, I went to meet my girlfriends parents for the first time. I accidentally drove past their house the first time, but saw the whole family outside waiting to meet me. I pulled a U-Turn and heard a thud. The whole family watched me run over their dog. FML
by Rhyno / 05/05/2009 at 11:37am / United States (New York) / Animals
Today, I was about to lose my virginity with my girlfriend of 2 years, when I got an urgent phone call from my 9-year-old sister, telling me I had to come home immediately. My grandma fell off the toilet and got stuck between the bowl and the wall. I'm not making this up. FML
by Anonymous / 05/03/2009 at 7:22pm / United States / Intimacy
Today, my fiancé's parents visited. I keep chickens for their eggs, and his parents own a farm, so we had a connection. They told us to leave the house while they cooked us dinner. When we returned, we faced two steaming plates of chicken. My chickens. They had names. FML
by lanbon182 / 04/10/2009 at 1:11am / United States (California) / Animals
Today, I awoke to the sound of my dad knocking on my dorm room door for a surprise visit. He's barely outside the door and I pull the door open and say hey, when my roommate strips naked pulls the door open, kisses me on the cheek, says in an uber-gay voice, "Thanks for last night", and leaves. FML
by konens_dick / 03/22/2009 at 6:38am / United States (Washington) / Intimacy
- « Previous page
- Next page »
- Today, I discovered the reason my favorite stick of deodorant hasn't smelled right for the past two… Today, my mom cleaned my room, while doing so she found a very detailed sex book I got from an ex… Today, to prove that my girlfriend is a "total skank", my best friend seduced her and showed me the…