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errata

Offline (the 09/02/2015 at 8:33am) | Search for a member

errata

2Fucked!

errata
  • Town/Country : Los Angeles, United States
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Saturday 7 July 1990 (25 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1044
  • Number of comments : 2
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About errata : Meh

errata's page activity

Visits<b>khoov19</b> - the 09/01/2015 at 5:48pm<b>the_rude_dude</b> - the 09/01/2015 at 6:58am<b>thatnakedguy</b> - the 09/01/2015 at 5:39am<b>Cristian89</b> - the 08/25/2015 at 12:26pm<b>inkjet</b> - the 08/24/2015 at 3:55am<b>haylburg</b> - the 08/21/2015 at 3:07pm<b>mineller</b> - the 08/16/2015 at 4:04pm<b>Mons</b> - the 08/13/2015 at 11:48am<b>JoeOfDoom</b> - the 07/21/2015 at 5:34am<b>sherbear78</b> - the 07/13/2015 at 6:26pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 07/13/2015 at 5:17pm<b>C7</b> - the 07/12/2015 at 3:16pm<b>battleaxebowman</b> - the 07/11/2015 at 5:39pm<b>FoxHunt9119</b> - the 07/11/2015 at 4:09pm<b>LivingLouder</b> - the 07/09/2013 at 11:10pm<b>Julianne_sings</b> - the 06/16/2013 at 12:35pm<b>graceinsheepwear</b> - the 06/13/2013 at 8:16pm

Fucked!<b>khoov19</b> - the 07/12/2015 at 11:26pm<b>C7</b> - the 07/12/2015 at 9:16pm

errata's FML badges

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errata's favorite FMLs

Today, while teaching juniors about black holes, I said, "Imagine everything being sucked into a black hole." An African-American student shouted, "I'd better start clenching!" Nobody took the lesson seriously after that. FML

#20946225
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45864) - you deserved it (5543)

On 11/05/2013 at 8:22am - work - by regretsteachinghighschool - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I walked in on my brother smoking weed. He immediately tried to hide it by dropping it down his pants, still lit. Screaming in pain, he pulled down his pants. The ashes burned his knob. I had to take him to the emergency room. FML

Today, one of the kids in my neighborhood told me he would mow my lawn for 10 bucks. After a few minutes, I heard the mower stop. He had mowed a penis into my front yard then run away. FML

#20841455
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47656) - you deserved it (7680)

On 08/17/2013 at 6:52am - kids - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was buying ingredients for a salad. I had only picked up a few cucumbers, when an elderly lady came up to me and murmured, "Make sure you use lots of lube, or that'll hurt. Been there, sweetheart." What the HELL? FML

#20817265
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57085) - you deserved it (5540)

On 08/02/2013 at 4:23pm - misc - by um... what the fuck, miss? (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, while using a restroom in Walmart, an old lady with a cane hobbled in screaming, "I smell someone making sin!" She would not stop tapping on the door with her cane till I came out. FML

#20808725
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44264) - you deserved it (3004)

On 07/28/2013 at 10:16pm - health - by DreamStatic - United States (Georgia)

Today, my dentist dropped dead of a heart attack. This depressing event was made worse by the fact that he collapsed while his hands were in my mouth. FML

Today, I took my boyfriend to meet my family. Over the next hour, a huge religious debate erupted, and my grandfather drunkenly told us all how he almost killed himself once while experimenting with auto-erotic asphyxiation. My boyfriend called us all crazy and seems to have dumped me. FML

#20788678
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47248) - you deserved it (5126)

On 07/17/2013 at 4:13pm - love - by fuck family (woman) - Poland (Dolnoslaskie)

Today, I had to pull one of those toy stretchy hands out of my dog's butthole. It slapped me in the face when I finally got it out. FML

#20787584
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59413) - you deserved it (7023)

On 07/17/2013 at 12:48am - animals - by anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I got a message from my brother on Facebook that read, "They're watching you." This wouldn't have been such a big deal if he hadn't been dead for two years. FML

#20773595
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (76452) - you deserved it (3868)

On 07/10/2013 at 1:24am - misc - by Wtf (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, on my first day at my new job delivering pizzas, I got bit by a guy dressed as Dracula. FML

#20750993
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43747) - you deserved it (3141)

On 06/27/2013 at 7:15pm - work - by keiran123 - United States (Louisiana)

Today, I cleaned up my brother's room, since he's moved out. Under the bed I found a Doritos bag full of used condoms. FML

#20749135
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60732) - you deserved it (6748)

On 06/26/2013 at 9:02pm - intimacy - by the_lonely_life - United States

Today, I returned home from a month long trip overseas to find that my bird sitter has trained my parrot to whisper, "You're going to die" in a sinister voice. FML

#20731669
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52144) - you deserved it (6722)

On 06/17/2013 at 4:07pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my boyfriend dumped me, accusing me of lying to him about "being a hermaphrodite". His almost total lack of knowledge about female anatomy led him to believe that my clitoris is actually an extremely tiny penis. FML

#20723435
258 comments

I agree, your life sucks (64134) - you deserved it (5784)

On 06/13/2013 at 12:19pm - intimacy - by Hannah (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my little sister was scared to sleep alone, so my parents made her sleep in bed with me. I barely slept, due to the utter terror of waking up to her chanting into my ear in a low whisper, "This is where you die, this is where you die..." FML

#20709788
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53655) - you deserved it (3675)

On 06/06/2013 at 2:47pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Isle of Man

Today, while sexting my girlfriend, I accidently sent a picture to her father instead of her. He sent back a link to a penis enlargement company's website. FML

#20705129
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32385) - you deserved it (68746)

On 06/04/2013 at 8:15am - misc - by tinypenis - United States (New York)



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