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enddmd

Offline (the 05/15/2014 at 11:38pm) | Search for a member

enddmd

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 496
  • Number of comments : 46
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About enddmd : Soooo.......ummm......Hello there. My name's Mike. I love music—real music—not any of that modern stuff, and I think that wearing red morphsuits is fun. Have a good day.

enddmd's page activity

Visits<b>Crusher74</b> - the 07/22/2014 at 7:20am<b>crapmaster3000</b> - the 07/11/2014 at 11:47pm<b>RedPillSucks</b> - the 07/11/2014 at 10:36pm<b>cherrio27</b> - the 07/07/2014 at 6:17pm<b>wilburhp</b> - the 07/03/2014 at 8:15am<b>Mike_Lemming</b> - the 07/03/2014 at 1:53am<b>jsosk</b> - the 06/19/2014 at 4:44am<b>Godsofdracos</b> - the 06/12/2014 at 5:06pm<b>Rallred32</b> - the 06/11/2014 at 10:01pm<b>eatdaussy69lol</b> - the 06/11/2014 at 2:07am<b>auro7</b> - the 06/10/2014 at 1:31am<b>rybaby23</b> - the 06/09/2014 at 8:15pm<b>dzhonatan</b> - the 06/09/2014 at 2:57pm<b>Juiceman105</b> - the 06/09/2014 at 2:23pm<b>Fusion_Fear</b> - the 06/03/2014 at 11:03am<b>Mafia_</b> - the 06/03/2014 at 1:21am<b>ilovetraveler</b> - the 06/02/2014 at 7:48pm<b>shivamtrivedi</b> - the 06/01/2014 at 11:27am

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enddmd's favorite FMLs

Today, I asked my class of fifth graders to write down a list of all the compound words they knew. At least four of them put down 'motherfucker'. FML

#21218609
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35791) - you deserved it (4140)

On 07/23/2014 at 7:16pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, on the bus, a little boy gave me the dirtiest look, pointed at my pregnant stomach, and menacingly said, "I know what you did." FML

#21205823
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49279) - you deserved it (6542)

On 07/11/2014 at 7:03am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I woke up to an old lady right outside my open window, saying "Hello in there! Are you sleepy?" I was so startled that I answered her. She screamed. Turns out she's my neighbour's elderly mother, didn't know I was in there, and was talking to my cat. FML

#21201617
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40650) - you deserved it (4022)

On 07/07/2014 at 11:59am - animals - by ADanceWithDavos (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, I woke up to my young niece hammering a metal cookie cutter into my leg. I'll have a teddy bear shaped scar for the rest of my life. FML

#21199181
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49096) - you deserved it (4644)

On 07/05/2014 at 1:40am - kids - by umerin - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my 6-year-old brother showed me the "books" he's been writing for the past week. My parents, who are first-generation immigrants, want him to take the books to school to show everyone. My only problem with this? The main character's name is "Wanker". FML

#21195314
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35818) - you deserved it (3234)

On 07/01/2014 at 5:41pm - kids - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was really hungry at work, and my stomach growled loudly. One of my co-workers heard it and thought it was a cat. Ashamed, I played dumb and we ended up spending twenty minutes looking for a cat that I knew didn't exist. FML

#21170120
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39905) - you deserved it (17436)

On 06/10/2014 at 9:01pm - animals - by imalosertho (woman) - Canada (Nova Scotia)

Today, some alarm, somewhere in my house, is making a low battery noise. I've checked every smoke detector multiple times, and I can't find it. It has been hours. I'm not sure if its still doing it or if the sound has just invaded my brain. FML

Today, I got yelled at by a customer while working at a bank call center. He was furious I apologized for a mistake that someone else had made. I again apologized for apologizing. FML

#21168093
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34375) - you deserved it (4479)

On 06/09/2014 at 10:27am - work - by apologetic (woman) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, at my all-night senior party, I was talking to the blind girl who I haven't had classes with since 9th grade. I unthinkingly opened the conversation with "Nice to see you again." FML

#21167586
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37865) - you deserved it (8896)

On 06/08/2014 at 10:17pm - misc - by It'd be nice to see you too. - United States (Minnesota)

Today, freshly dumped and at a bar, I focussed my attention on trying to stand in such a way that I looked like an attractive, alluring, confident person. Apparently I forgot how to successfully stand upright and sprained my ankle. FML

#21157984
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36653) - you deserved it (9220)

On 05/31/2014 at 5:13am - health - by jjcod (woman) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, it's my first day working the graveyard shift at a local hotel. My new boss thought it would be hilarious to sneak up behind me while dressed like the Grim Reaper. I screamed like a little girl and soaked my pants. Apparently he does this to all the new people. FML

#21130670
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42858) - you deserved it (6127)

On 05/04/2014 at 5:07pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - Czech Republic (Hlavni mesto Praha)

Today, it was my first ever live piano performance. It went all great until the end, when I stood up, slipped, and smashed face-first into the keys. I've lost half a tooth and all my dignity. FML

#21100221
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42803) - you deserved it (3424)

On 03/30/2014 at 2:45pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Worcestershire)

Today, I was in my Honors English class. I sneezed very loudly while my teacher was giving a lecture. I had the genius idea to say, "Sorry, I'm allergic to bullshit." FML

Today, I met my girlfriend's father for the first time. The first thing he did was show me a bullet, then he basically said that if I don't submit to his daughter's every whim, that bullet will end my life. FML

#21011731
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41039) - you deserved it (4974)

On 12/31/2013 at 3:57pm - love - by thisisavirus.exe (man) - United States (Oregon)

Today, my dad met my boyfriend for the first time. He soon "casually" took a huge knife from the kitchen drawer and told my boyfriend that he's always wondered what it'd be like to stab someone. FML

#20967242
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43308) - you deserved it (4411)

On 11/22/2013 at 8:08pm - love - by quit fucking up my life (woman) - United States (Alaska)



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  • FML on vacation #1: Getting there
  • A lot of people will spout off the tired old cliché that the destination isn't as important as the journey itself. Well, what if you're on your way to the Playboy Mansion then?…

Tuesday 22 July 2014

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