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enddmd

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 598
  • Number of comments : 60
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About enddmd : Soooo.......ummm......Hello there. My name's Mike. I love music—real music—not any of that modern stuff, and I think that wearing red morphsuits is fun. Have a pleasant day (and, yes, I AM telling you what kind of day to have).

enddmd's page activity

Visits<b>SuperWhoLockian7</b> - the 09/17/2014 at 2:32am<b>kaitlynnn95</b> - the 09/14/2014 at 11:00am<b>thevelociraptor</b> - the 09/14/2014 at 12:39am<b>westmall21</b> - the 09/13/2014 at 6:50pm<b>glubbwubb</b> - the 09/13/2014 at 12:13pm<b>Tyde</b> - the 09/13/2014 at 3:14am<b>wisesombrero</b> - the 09/12/2014 at 6:28pm<b>Rozebosje</b> - the 09/12/2014 at 12:50am<b>mzcupcakez</b> - the 09/11/2014 at 11:56pm<b>CrAzYELF4</b> - the 09/11/2014 at 12:41am<b>Just_A_Tree</b> - the 09/10/2014 at 11:24pm<b>saxoBEAST57</b> - the 09/06/2014 at 10:32pm<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 09/06/2014 at 7:38pm<b>BBlah</b> - the 09/06/2014 at 6:02pm<b>awesomeness716</b> - the 08/30/2014 at 8:43pm<b>notachinesewoman</b> - the 08/30/2014 at 4:23pm<b>ruckfules85</b> - the 08/30/2014 at 3:18pm<b>pikawarriors</b> - the 08/29/2014 at 11:24pm

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enddmd's favorite FMLs

Today, I sat in on a university-level physics lecture, listening to my hyped-up co-students approximating the hypothetical situation of the Sun consisting of gerbils. The conversation then continued towards how much better energy/mass ratio the gerbil-sun would have compared to the actual star. FML

#21258867
76 comments

Today, I discovered that one of our cats is super creepy. He humps the blankets on my mother's bed while staring at her while she's sleeping. FML

#21257305
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34657) - you deserved it (2947)

On 09/13/2014 at 2:56am - animals - by Anonymous - Canada (Alberta)

Today, the security at the airport were nice enough to remind me to take the laptop out of my bag. I wish they'd also reminded me to put it back in before I left. FML

#21250584
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37175) - you deserved it (11307)

On 09/02/2014 at 3:48pm - misc - by A continent away (woman) - Estonia (Harjumaa)

Today, I was called in over speakers at the airport. The man who was speaking clearly and nearly burst out laughing when he said my name. Soon, a few people around also snickered when they heard it. I had to wait five minutes before I could casually stand up. My last name is Bastard. FML

#21248318
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41092) - you deserved it (3209)

On 08/30/2014 at 4:35am - misc - by poorbastard (man) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, my boss decided our 4 year relationship was unethical, so she broke up with me, then terminated my employment. FML

#21242835
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40181) - you deserved it (5453)

On 08/21/2014 at 11:53pm - love - by flyakite - United States

Today, it's the 16th day of my period. FML

#21241406
295 comments

I agree, your life sucks (64306) - you deserved it (4104)

On 08/20/2014 at 1:15am - health - by BagelTheOtaku (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, while I was at the dentist, I couldn't stop gagging when he tried to put a tab in my mouth to get an x-ray. As I left, I overheard him saying, "I feel sorry for her boyfriend." FML

#21238932
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47496) - you deserved it (7659)

On 08/16/2014 at 12:03pm - intimacy - by gag reflex - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, the man I have been in love with for years came to me with a beautiful ring and a heartfelt proposal. Too bad it ended with an eager, "So do you think he'll say yes?" FML

Today, I asked my class of fifth graders to write down a list of all the compound words they knew. At least four of them put down 'motherfucker'. FML

#21218609
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40037) - you deserved it (4513)

On 07/23/2014 at 7:16pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, on the bus, a little boy gave me the dirtiest look, pointed at my pregnant stomach, and menacingly said, "I know what you did." FML

#21205823
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50556) - you deserved it (6621)

On 07/11/2014 at 7:03am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I woke up to an old lady right outside my open window, saying "Hello in there! Are you sleepy?" I was so startled that I answered her. She screamed. Turns out she's my neighbour's elderly mother, didn't know I was in there, and was talking to my cat. FML

#21201617
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40997) - you deserved it (4036)

On 07/07/2014 at 11:59am - animals - by ADanceWithDavos (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, I woke up to my young niece hammering a metal cookie cutter into my leg. I'll have a teddy bear shaped scar for the rest of my life. FML

#21199181
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49661) - you deserved it (4655)

On 07/05/2014 at 1:40am - kids - by umerin - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my 6-year-old brother showed me the "books" he's been writing for the past week. My parents, who are first-generation immigrants, want him to take the books to school to show everyone. My only problem with this? The main character's name is "Wanker". FML

#21195314
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36045) - you deserved it (3245)

On 07/01/2014 at 5:41pm - kids - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was really hungry at work, and my stomach growled loudly. One of my co-workers heard it and thought it was a cat. Ashamed, I played dumb and we ended up spending twenty minutes looking for a cat that I knew didn't exist. FML

#21170120
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40007) - you deserved it (17458)

On 06/10/2014 at 9:01pm - animals - by imalosertho (woman) - Canada (Nova Scotia)

Today, some alarm, somewhere in my house, is making a low battery noise. I've checked every smoke detector multiple times, and I can't find it. It has been hours. I'm not sure if its still doing it or if the sound has just invaded my brain. FML



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  • So, have you ordered it? Have you got it? No? Yes? Do you have any idea of what I'm talking about? OK, for the normal people, I'm talking about the new iPhone 6. Apparently, it came out today. I'm not…

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