enddmd

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enddmd

8Fucked!

enddmdenddmd
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1769
  • Number of comments : 91
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About enddmd : Soooo.......ummm......Hello there. My name's Mike. I love music—playing, reading, and listening—and I think that wearing morphsuits (and other identity-hiding costumes) is fun. Have a pleasant day.



...What are you still doing here? Go fuck a cactus or something. (Or give me a 'Fuck,' as I just ran out of ones to give).

enddmd's page activity

Visits<b>jade_midori</b> - the 12/20/2015 at 6:05pm<b>silkyred</b> - the 08/31/2015 at 11:27pm<b>blakeyboy22</b> - the 08/07/2015 at 7:34pm<b>HerpityDerp</b> - the 07/16/2015 at 8:21pm<b>RawrPancaked</b> - the 07/07/2015 at 11:26pm<b>MrRigger69</b> - the 06/17/2015 at 1:26am<b>AlliTheKat</b> - the 05/09/2015 at 2:06am<b>HedgeOfTheHogs</b> - the 05/05/2015 at 9:39am<b>PlainWhiteWalls</b> - the 04/16/2015 at 1:32am<b>missmorggan</b> - the 04/14/2015 at 11:00am<b>EvilTurtle</b> - the 04/12/2015 at 1:17pm<b>ElMungia</b> - the 04/12/2015 at 9:17am<b>cocoapanda</b> - the 03/25/2015 at 6:37am<b>ChoolyBooly</b> - the 03/09/2015 at 10:02pm<b>Jinxsie</b> - the 03/08/2015 at 6:17pm<b>thatguynamedsky</b> - the 03/08/2015 at 2:44pm<b>PurpleSprite</b> - the 03/08/2015 at 1:34pm<b>Meettitan</b> - the 03/07/2015 at 2:59pm

Fucked!<b>silkyred</b> - the 09/01/2015 at 5:28am<b>HedgeOfTheHogs</b> - the 05/05/2015 at 1:02am<b>EvilTurtle</b> - the 04/11/2015 at 12:38pm<b>Jinxsie</b> - the 03/08/2015 at 11:17pm<b>PokeyPorcupine</b> - the 02/22/2015 at 9:49am<b>patrickalamo</b> - the 01/06/2015 at 6:40am<b>AnnaDeWitt</b> - the 01/05/2015 at 11:38am<b>gatorclay97</b> - the 10/20/2014 at 5:06pm

enddmd's FML badges

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

See all of enddmd's badges

enddmd's favorite FMLs

Today, my mother gave me hell for my "video game addiction". The "game" in question? A professional flight simulator program that I'm using to complement my flight school lessons. FML

by simugeek / 08/15/2015 at 1:53am / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I went to a garden party my friend had invited me to. I soon discovered they had seriously downplayed the formality of the event, as I noticed trays of fancy hors d'oeuvres and glasses of champagne lined up on the table. I showed up with Kool Aid and Ritz crackers. FML

by Anonymous / 07/28/2015 at 8:22am / United Kingdom (Slough) / Miscellaneous

Today, I got fired, apparently for being racist to black people. When I told my boyfriend, he couldn't stop laughing. He's black. FML

by Razz / 07/15/2015 at 6:02pm / Australia (Victoria) / Miscellaneous

Today, I found a picture of myself on the "People of Walmart" site. FML

by Anonymous / 07/11/2015 at 1:03am / United States (Colorado) / Miscellaneous

Today, while lifeguarding over children at work, I started thinking about my girlfriend and got a hard on. Before I realized it, I saved a kid and then hopped out of the pool next to a 5 year old in front of my managers and a little over 50 patrons with a raging boner. My HR meeting is tomorrow. FML

by notacreep / 07/06/2015 at 1:28pm / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I was at the market when a guy started telling the man I was with how "curly-haired women are an adventure," saying what he would do to a woman like me. He was talking to my father. FML

by Nope / 06/26/2015 at 5:46pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was at my lifeguarding exam. Everything was going well until I went to 'save' someone and slipped and bellyflopped into the pool. I broke my toe, and the person I was supposed to save ended up saving me instead. FML

by mytoehurts / 06/26/2015 at 9:09am / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

Today, after parking in the handicapped spot of a lot with my placard, an older couple with their 7-year-old grandchild came up and yelled at me for being a lying asshole and taking the parking spot. When I showed them my prosthetic leg, the kid started crying and guess who got yelled at again. FML

by ICanExplain / 06/22/2015 at 4:46pm / United States (California) / Health

Today, I was invited to a fancy-shmancy charity event, and the host - my friend - told me to wear a long, ballroom, fancy gown. Turns out my friend was just being a dick and it was a pool party. I spent $200 on my hair and makeup alone. FML

by ssondik / 06/21/2015 at 8:50pm / United States (Connecticut) / Miscellaneous

Today, my neighbor's son siphoned the fuel out of my lawn mower and put it in his car. What he didn't realize is that the fuel mixture I use in my lawn mower would ruin his car engine. His dad says it's my fault and actually insists I should pay his pissant son's repair bill. FML

by Anonymous / 06/13/2015 at 8:42am / United States (Maryland) / Money

Today, my husband and I broke the news to my 10-year-old son that in about 8 months, he'll have a baby brother or sister. I knew he never wanted a sibling, but I didn't expect him to throw a tantrum, then look at me through teary eyes and scream, "Why can't you keep your fucking legs closed?" FML

by Anonymous / 06/10/2015 at 12:13pm / United States (Kentucky) / Kids

Today, my drunken mother shouted to me at the top of her lungs, "All men are fucking assholes, and your new husband is no different!" during our wedding reception. All he did was ask her how she liked the salmon. FML

by How's the salmon? / 05/10/2015 at 2:00am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, while out shopping with friends, I was apphrehended by two bounty hunters because they recognized my purple-dyed hair. Too bad my name isn't Natalie, who apparently shares the same hair color. They didn't believe me, even after I showed my ID. FML

by StargazeKitsune / 05/06/2015 at 8:48pm / United States (North Dakota) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I failed a major exam. It wasn't because I didn't prepare for it, though. I failed because somebody sneezed during it and I said "bless you." Apparently, that's classed as cheating. FML

Today, I started work cleaning a customer's pool. I think her husband watches too much porn because he keeps glaring at me from the windows, and I overheard him telling his wife that he knows what's "going on" and that he's "not gonna let it happen". FML

by cock blocked / 04/22/2015 at 11:44am / United States (California) / Work