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emmingle

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 6236
  • Number of comments : 73
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 24 posted

About emmingle : I probably won't message you back

emmingle's page activity

Visits<b>RokNRoll11</b> - the 07/19/2014 at 2:02am<b>thatkid00117</b> - the 07/11/2014 at 7:52pm<b>itskattt</b> - the 07/07/2014 at 3:16pm<b>omgbrainZ</b> - the 07/01/2014 at 8:20am<b>SamtheMan19</b> - the 06/30/2014 at 8:35am<b>simsgirlgem</b> - the 06/24/2014 at 9:19am<b>srinivasawesum</b> - the 06/24/2014 at 2:46am<b>ItsJustMe1616</b> - the 06/23/2014 at 12:15am<b>Callilah</b> - the 06/22/2014 at 11:14pm<b>Kah1on</b> - the 06/22/2014 at 7:13pm<b>mathen</b> - the 06/22/2014 at 4:26am<b>AlexEsc11</b> - the 06/22/2014 at 2:05am<b>mazdatuner09</b> - the 06/22/2014 at 12:24am<b>MikeyLean</b> - the 06/22/2014 at 12:18am<b>simbafinau183</b> - the 06/21/2014 at 11:06pm<b>Edogg215</b> - the 06/21/2014 at 6:17pm<b>Joe_Valdez25</b> - the 06/21/2014 at 5:41pm<b>jonnyscash</b> - the 06/21/2014 at 4:07pm

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emmingle's favorite FMLs

Today, I had to calm my hallucinating mom after she accidentally overdosed on one of her pills, then spend ages trying to protect her from the "monkey" on the wall. FML

#20866110
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37197) - you deserved it (2338)

On 09/03/2013 at 2:04pm - misc - by D - United States (California)

Today, I was at the doctor's getting a check up. He asked me if I was allergic to anything, to which I blurted out, "Cats." He gave me a weird look and said, "Don't worry, I won't give you cats." FML

#20865755
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38648) - you deserved it (6395)

On 09/03/2013 at 4:17am - health - by NoNotCats =^._.^= (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, my company is doing so bad that I had to take down my symbolic first dollar so that I could buy a roll of crackers for dinner. FML

#20865414
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41595) - you deserved it (3091)

On 09/02/2013 at 11:03pm - work - by smurftastic (man) - United States (California)

Today, I resigned from my job in favor of a higher-paying one. After I filled out and filed the necessary papers, my boss told me that I had been nominated to replace him when he retired in a month. His job pays at least twice what I'm now making. Thanks for telling me, asshat. FML

#20863852
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37598) - you deserved it (12733)

On 09/01/2013 at 11:18pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my friend told me she turned down a job as a babysitter because she didn't want to be secretly videotaped, as she knew the people had a nanny cam. I wasn't aware of this when I took that same job a few nights ago and asked my boyfriend to come by. We had sex on their couch. FML

#20862871
223 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21527) - you deserved it (83673)

On 09/01/2013 at 5:57am - intimacy - by happyturtle (woman) - Croatia

Today, I woke up to my 5-year-old standing over me with a pillow. I asked him what he was doing, and he replied that he and Steve were playing a game, but Steve said I have to be asleep for it. Steve is my son's imaginary friend. I'm convinced Steve wants to kill me. FML

#20842823
181 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51094) - you deserved it (3017)

On 08/18/2013 at 5:37am - kids - by DrtySnchez - United States (Georgia)

Today, we were having a family dinner with my boyfriend's parents and mine. In the kitchen, when we were getting the food ready, he proposed. I screamed. My dad thought he was hurting me, came in and tased him in the leg. FML

#20841540
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53311) - you deserved it (5852)

On 08/17/2013 at 10:18am - love - by why - United States (Tennessee)

Today, my dad, under threats of disowning me, insisted that I offer my sister a job in my company. I run my own law firm, she is a hairdresser. FML

#20838513
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47886) - you deserved it (3028)

On 08/15/2013 at 9:34am - work - by lawman (man) - Denmark (Hovedstaden)

Today, I discovered I have epilepsy. 10 years ago, I told my mother about my frequent fits of vertigo, deja vu, nausea, flashes of memory and strange sounds, smells, and images, coupled with an other-worldly feeling. I thought they were holy visions. So did she. FML

Today, my dog died. In the same kitchen corner that two of my other dogs have died. I have a "Corner Of Death" in my kitchen. FML

#20833377
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49917) - you deserved it (2749)

On 08/12/2013 at 4:17am - animals - by The Corner Of Death (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, to help with my insomnia, I downloaded some relaxing rain MP3s and set them to loop. For the first time in ages, I fell asleep within minutes. Somewhere around 5, however, the sound of trickling water caused my bladder to empty itself all over my bed. FML

#20832201
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41157) - you deserved it (5935)

On 08/11/2013 at 1:24pm - misc - by just about pissed off (woman) - Egypt (Al Qahirah)

Today, I went to the Giants game. During the seventh inning stretch they showed me on the jumbo-tron. It was just in time for the entire stadium to see me pull a tampon out of my purse. FML

#20799228
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58223) - you deserved it (7569)

On 07/23/2013 at 10:49am - misc - by GiantsFan13 - United States (Colorado)

Today, I was getting freaky with my boyfriend and told him to spank me. In a seductive voice, he told me not to tell him what to do. Continuing, I asked him how he was going to punish me, to which he then replied, "I'm going to punch you straight in the face." FML

#20798640
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53686) - you deserved it (11307)

On 07/23/2013 at 12:04am - intimacy - by suckstosuck (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I asked this really cute girl for her number. I had nothing else on me so I told her to write it on a dollar bill. Later, without thinking, I put it in a vending machine. I freaked out and frantically pushed the return button. It gave me back quarters. FML

Today, I asked this really cute girl for her number. I had nothing else on me so I told her to write it on a dollar bill. Later, without thinking, I put it in a vending machine. I freaked out and frantically pushed the return button. It gave me back quarters. FML



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Friday 18 July 2014

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