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emmingle

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emmingle
  • Town/Country : Vancouver, Canada
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 4460
  • Number of comments : 67
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 21 posted

About emmingle : I probably won't message you back

emmingle's last visitors

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You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

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You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

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You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

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emmingle's favorite FMLs

Today, I proposed to my girlfriend in the food court at the mall. When she said "yes", the entire food court broke out in applause, and my girlfriend and I were escorted out of the mall for "starting a riot". I never knew clapping was a crime. FML

#677461
397 comments

I agree, your life sucks (95915) - you deserved it (21132)

On 03/29/2009 at 10:03am - love - by engaged (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was going through my old MSN conversations. I then realized that when I first got MSN, I didn't know that messages you sent after people went offline would be delivered to them when they signed in. I used to type 'I love you' to my crush after every time he went offline. FML

#665920
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29466) - you deserved it (79741)

On 03/28/2009 at 6:13pm - love - by WeezysBaby (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was feeling sick and having trouble breathing easily. I decided to take a nap and apparently ended up sleeping with my mouth wide open since breathing was an issue. I woke up to my boyfriend trying to put his penis in my mouth. FML

#632473
195 comments

I agree, your life sucks (151389) - you deserved it (25344)

On 03/26/2009 at 9:45pm - intimacy - by coughandcold (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my mother asked me if my boyfriend and I were getting serious. I quickly lied and said no. She then informed me that if things ever heated up that she would take me to get birthcontrol. Wanting birthcontrol, I confessed. In turn she grounded me. I am not allowed to see my boyfriend anymore. FML

#602653
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55172) - you deserved it (23636)

On 03/25/2009 at 4:40pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I had an elaborate plan to ask this girl to Prom, and it was going to take a few minutes to set up. I asked my friend to distract her. He decided to distract her by asking her to Prom. She said "Yes". FML

#574471
259 comments

I agree, your life sucks (227322) - you deserved it (30250)

On 03/24/2009 at 11:41am - love - by Kaeyne (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I had to perform a skit in my class in which I have to wear tight spandex compression shorts. The class laughed pretty hard, and I felt like I had done a good job. Afterward, a girl I have a crush on said, "So the stereotype about Asian guys IS true." Through the fluorescent lights you could see my junk. FML

#571652
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (72770) - you deserved it (9875)

On 03/24/2009 at 2:47am - misc - by spandex (man) - United States (California)

Today, my 11 year old brother walked in on me sitting on my boyfriend's ass and giving him a back massage. He tilted his head a little and then said "Aren't you guys doing it wrong? Isn't he supposed to be on top?" My boyfriend laughed and gave him a high-five. FML

#560138
282 comments

I agree, your life sucks (91371) - you deserved it (28438)

On 03/23/2009 at 7:12pm - intimacy - by SLA (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I decided to play a joke on my boyfriend and planned to pretend that I found a thong in his gym bag. When he came home, I "confronted" him. After struggling through putting on my best face, he, unexpectedly confessed: "Look, babe, I'm sorry. It meant nothing." FML

#556029
245 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48925) - you deserved it (83763)

On 03/23/2009 at 4:42pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I was with my girlfriend and she was making me listen to one of her recordings for chorus. As I was listening to it a solo came on, and i turned to her and said "This is the worst F*ing solo I've ever heard in my life." Little did I know, it was her solo. FML

#539195
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10608) - you deserved it (63932)

On 03/22/2009 at 8:38pm - misc - by anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I awoke to the sound of my dad knocking on my dorm room door for a surprise visit. He's barely outside the door and I pull the door open and say hey, when my roommate strips naked pulls the door open, kisses me on the cheek, says in an uber-gay voice, "Thanks for last night", and leaves. FML

#527227
515 comments

I agree, your life sucks (227098) - you deserved it (29238)

On 03/22/2009 at 6:38am - intimacy - by konens_dick (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I slept over at my friend's house but forgot my glasses. When I woke up in the morning, I came out of his room and forcefully kicked what I thought was a soccer ball on the floor. Turns out it was his miniature poodle - it fell down a long flight of stairs. FML

#459087
281 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26250) - you deserved it (99367)

On 03/19/2009 at 1:15am - misc - by JohnMackSquirts (man) - United States (California)

Today, I fell asleep in class during a boring economics lecture. I heard a whisper say "Rise and shine sleeping beauty." I thought it was my boyfriend, so i responded "Baby, what time is it? When is this F*ing class going to be over!?" it wasnt my boyfriend talking, it was my teacher. FML

#437815
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13536) - you deserved it (75543)

On 03/18/2009 at 11:48am - misc - by Noname (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I was in an elevator with my brother and a woman. He signs to me that she has a 'damn fine ass'. I chuckle and then shake my head. He shrugs. A second later the woman signs to us, 'Rick, don't you remember me?' Turns out she helped teach my brother sign language when he was six. FML

#434812
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39890) - you deserved it (22365)

On 03/18/2009 at 3:59am - misc - by elevator-troubles (man) - Australia (Australian Capital Territory)

Today, while I was out to eat, I was approached by the restaurant manager. He told me that while he respected my personal choices, his patrons didn't feel comfortable with someone who used to be a man using the women's restroom. He thought I was a transsexual. I am a naturally-born female. FML

#424816
218 comments

I agree, your life sucks (320181) - you deserved it (28086)

On 03/17/2009 at 9:24pm - misc - by Noname (woman) - United States (Maine)



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