emmingle

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Offline (the 12/04/2015 at 12:16am)

emmingle

31Fucked!

emmingle
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 17244
  • Number of comments : 75
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 30 posted

About emmingle : Czech-Canadian trying to make it big as a crayon designer.

emmingle's page activity

Visits<b>TexanZaros</b> - the 08/21/2016 at 11:26pm<b>maggeei</b> - the 07/24/2016 at 12:40am<b>TheDarkLight</b> - the 07/22/2016 at 8:53am<b>SOILEDIT</b> - the 07/15/2016 at 3:53am<b>MitchRapp</b> - the 07/10/2016 at 8:18pm<b>ifuckuprandomly</b> - the 06/21/2016 at 10:54am<b>NoFightinDestiny</b> - the 06/06/2016 at 3:35pm<b>connorcaffery</b> - the 06/06/2016 at 1:20pm<b>Geoffelosophy</b> - the 05/21/2016 at 1:03pm<b>Seeyounarabish</b> - the 05/19/2016 at 12:15am<b>TheHinduHomie</b> - the 04/27/2016 at 7:53am<b>george_s_4</b> - the 04/26/2016 at 7:28am<b>Supernova116</b> - the 04/25/2016 at 8:20pm<b>dbpdp</b> - the 04/20/2016 at 5:56pm<b>leo2g1</b> - the 04/12/2016 at 10:07pm<b>SurfingPichu</b> - the 04/09/2016 at 9:49am<b>LeChef</b> - the 04/07/2016 at 6:45am<b>BananEnigma</b> - the 04/06/2016 at 6:39pm

Fucked!<b>ifuckuprandomly</b> - the 06/21/2016 at 4:54pm<b>BananEnigma</b> - the 04/07/2016 at 12:39am<b>pks2014</b> - the 03/19/2016 at 4:20am<b>dom_g</b> - the 03/04/2016 at 7:53am<b>Hilda_x</b> - the 02/15/2016 at 3:08am<b>wanted_2_want</b> - the 01/09/2016 at 6:10am<b>Y0UI34574RD</b> - the 12/24/2015 at 2:29am<b>Walmartian2015</b> - the 12/18/2015 at 8:42pm<b>2C0OL4SCH0OL</b> - the 11/24/2015 at 7:39pm<b>AscendV</b> - the 11/13/2015 at 7:26am<b>Amaury56</b> - the 09/21/2015 at 11:08pm<b>imkool136</b> - the 09/21/2015 at 10:18am<b>bomzo</b> - the 09/21/2015 at 10:02am<b>AyeTee77</b> - the 09/21/2015 at 8:02am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 08/18/2015 at 12:00am<b>TacoloverSWE</b> - the 07/16/2015 at 4:39pm<b>lil_jimmy</b> - the 07/01/2015 at 12:04pm<b>Ethan_Anonymous</b> - the 06/09/2015 at 12:08pm

emmingle's FML badges

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

Perfectionist

Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

See all of emmingle's badges

emmingle's favorite FMLs

Today, while waiting in the queue at a supermarket checkout, my three-year-old daughter yells out, "Mom! Mom! Is that a man or a lady in front?" Embarrassed, I reply, "Honey, can't you see that it's a... it's a... a..." FML

by [...] / 12/12/2013 at 9:28am / France (Rhone-Alpes) / Kids

Today, I found a credit card at my job. As store policy goes, we have to cut up lost cards immediately after finding them to protect the cardholders. As I grab the scissors and cut, my manager calls out, "Has anyone seen my credit card?" FML

by mariology / 12/11/2013 at 7:33am / United States (Delaware) / Work

Today, my elderly neighbor along with our community church's priest came to my house and demanded to "give them the girl". The girl is my 3-year-old daughter, who has natural born red irises and is photo-sensitive. And yes, we are also Romanian. FML

by OakStake / 12/08/2013 at 5:07pm / United States (New York) / Kids

Today, my neighbor finally password-protected his wifi. Right in the middle of my timed, online exam. FML

by Anonymous / 11/21/2013 at 5:30pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, while my hometown mayor becomes a world-famous crackhead and douche-bag, here in the UK it has come to this: when people hear my accent and ask me if I'm American, it's less embarrassing just to say, "Yeah", rather than admit I'm Canadian. FML

by unproud / 11/15/2013 at 2:05am / United Kingdom (Luton) / Miscellaneous

Today, I tried to put the little girl I babysit in timeout for lying to me. I was about to sit her down when she made a mad dash for the basement stairs, slipped on the wood floor, and fell down them. She told her parents and everyone at the ER that I had thrown her down the stairs. FML

by little_star78 / 11/13/2013 at 6:08am / United States (Michigan) / Kids

Today, my girlfriend "got even" with me after an argument by telling people that I've been beating her. Three guys later came over to my place and beat the crap out of me. Her reaction: "I didn't think they'd take it so serious!" FML

Today, my husband was getting undressed. I told my 2-year-old daughter not to go in our bedroom because he was undressing in there. I turned my back and she instantly ran off to my bedroom. I heard her shout "I can see daddy's tail!" Now, she points to everyone's crotch and shouts "TAIL!" FML

by KittyKat / 11/03/2013 at 9:22am / United Kingdom (Milton Keynes) / Kids

Today, while I was working out, I was listening to music with my earbuds in. The Pokémon theme started playing and I begun singing along. It wasn't too long after that I remembered I was in a crowded gym on a military base. FML

by GymBattle / 10/31/2013 at 7:18pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, a radio show asked the question, "Where does the dentist live in Finding Nemo?" I called in and got through. When he asked me the question, instead of the actual answer I quickly gave out my own address over live radio. FML

by Anonymous / 10/30/2013 at 11:58am / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went to school without any makeup on. The guys who usually compliment me for being pretty are now calling me "The Greatest Illusion Ever". FML

by The greatest Illusion ever / 10/28/2013 at 4:31pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I failed hard at a color test. I thought it was a joke because most of the colors looked the same to me. Now I know why people laugh at my clothes color choices. FML

by Anonymous / 10/28/2013 at 12:51am / United States (California) / Health

Today, a homeless guy asked me for a cigarette. Knowing that I only had a couple left in my pack, I gave it to him. He opened it, took one out and thanked me profusely. A bit surprised, I went on my way. Oh yes, that's right, the pack contained the money I'd withdrawn from an ATM. FML

by cAtaLanbLoOd / 10/24/2013 at 2:06am / France (Languedoc-Roussillon) / Money

Today, I heard crashing noises coming from my dining room. I got up to see what it was; my asshat cat was flinging himself at my chandelier. He'd figured out how to grab the ceiling fan from the other room, build momentum, and launch into my expensive chandelier. Hooray. FML

by IamAflyingCat / 10/22/2013 at 5:12am / United States / Animals

Today, after recently complaining that the reality show "The Great Norway Adventure" portrays us as a country of nationalistic rednecks, I saw my drunk dad chasing my uncle on a tractor while bellowing the national anthem at the top of his lungs. FML

by overly nationalistic redneck / 10/19/2013 at 3:37pm / Norway (Hordaland) / Miscellaneous