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How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/
Today, I carved a pumpkin for Halloween. I thought it would be cool to carve my name, and have it shine through onto the wall behind it. I figured that if I carved my name backwards then it would show up correct on the wall. My name's Lana and now my wall says Anal. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8846) - you deserved it (32040)
On 10/23/2009 at 1:22am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Washington)
Today, I threw a paper ball into a recycling bin backwards. I don't know whats more sad: the fact that that was my highlight of my life, or I had been attempting to make that shot every day for 3 years. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19122) - you deserved it (4605)
On 10/23/2009 at 12:47am - misc - by efmylife (man) - United States (Georgia)
Today, I got diagnosed with a condition that expresses itself in the form of violent diarrhea whenever I get nervous. Now I am constantly nervous about getting nervous about anything. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34110) - you deserved it (1628)
On 10/18/2009 at 9:36am - health - by Anonymous (man) - Sweden (Norrbottens Lan)
Today, I woke up very hung over after a big party last night. As I walked into my kitchen to make something to eat, I noticed a weird smell. Turns out my friend had thrown up in my freezer, and then turned off my whole fridge so "it wouldn't freeze and be hard for me to clean up in the morning." FML
I agree, your life sucks (18572) - you deserved it (2857)
On 10/14/2009 at 9:16pm - misc - by Pimp53X (man) - Australia (Australian Capital Territory)
Today, my son lost his pet rat, Charlie. Whilst vacuuming under my couch, the vacuum suddenly shut off. Something was stuck in it, so I took it apart. Something was inside, so I leaned in closer to get a better look. Bad news? I need a new vacuum. Good news? I found Charlie. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21377) - you deserved it (2807)
On 10/12/2009 at 1:27am - misc - by ohgosh (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I was pretending to be a monkey for a "documentary". The branch snapped and I fell out of the tree and onto a car roof. It was after school, I fell onto the dean's BMW. The video was on facebook before I regained consciousness. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21299) - you deserved it (7283)
On 10/09/2009 at 10:04am - misc - by jane (woman) - Australia (Queensland)
Today, I was on the phone with my friend, when my four year old nephew came in, asking who I was talking to. I told him it was Santa Claus, so he insisted on talking to him. I handed over the phone and I hear, "Santa is fake. Grow up." I spent the next two hours with a screaming child proving Santa exists. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8984) - you deserved it (26524)
On 10/08/2009 at 1:14am - kids - by stupidsantaclaus (woman) - United States (California)
Today, my friend thought it would be funny to dress in all black with a ski mask and use my spare key to break into my house as a joke. He though it was even funnier when I jumped out the window and broke my leg. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30368) - you deserved it (4254)
On 10/03/2009 at 1:55pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)
Today, I was woken up from a nap by my cat attacking my face. Evidently, my husband thought it would be funny to shine a laser pointer on my cheek. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24745) - you deserved it (2035)
On 10/02/2009 at 6:23pm - love - by Zamaria - Sent from mobile version
Today, I was hanging out with my best friend. I have been getting these random explicit texts and phone calls so I just joking said to my friend, "I think someone wrote my number on a bathroom stall." At which point he said, "Sorry, I didn't think people really called those numbers." FML
I agree, your life sucks (30972) - you deserved it (2180)
On 09/13/2009 at 11:57am - misc - by Casden (man) - United States (Arkansas)
Today, my girlfriend, who is a dog trainer, was telling me all about the techniques she uses at work. I commented on how the dogs must be stupid to fall for such simple tricks, to which she replied "They worked on you." FML
I agree, your life sucks (7357) - you deserved it (29813)
On 09/12/2009 at 8:00am - love - by TrainedBF (man) - United States (Arizona)
Today, the guy I have been in love with for years decided to tell me all about his women problems and how he can't find someone. After telling him I loved him he responds, "do you know if anyone else does?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (34468) - you deserved it (2459)
On 09/12/2009 at 3:39am - love - by ksgirl (woman) - United States (Arkansas)
Today, I got out of the shower to find my cat staring up at me. Apparently my swinging penis looks like a cat toy to her, so she jumped up and clawed and tried to bite it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31954) - you deserved it (4869)
On 09/11/2009 at 4:46pm - animals - by ouchh (man) - United States (California)
Today, for the first time ever, while I was driving I ran over a squirrel. It was in front of three little girls at their lemonade stand. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29085) - you deserved it (3955)
On 09/09/2009 at 12:23am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)
Today, I finally worked up the nerve to text the girl I've had a crush on to ask her on a date. I got back the reply, "Error message 3265: Number No Longer In Swrvice." Not only can she not spell, when I looked it up, "error 3265" doesn't even exist. FML
I agree, your life sucks (60407) - you deserved it (5901)
On 08/17/2009 at 5:41pm - love - by ZSL (woman) - United States (New York)
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