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eminem4ever

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eminem4ever
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  • Number of visits : 342
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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Today, I brought my girlfriend home for the first time. I was really excited to introduce her to my parents, until we found my mother waving around a wooden sword, and my father trying to shove my sister into the dryer. FML

#20671220
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34516) - you deserved it (3566)

On 05/18/2013 at 4:06pm - love - by Mr_poole (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, my little brother gave me a candy bar for my birthday. After I ate the entire thing, he told me it was Ex-Lax and that I needed it because I'm "so full of shit". FML

#20668693
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38978) - you deserved it (6595)

On 05/17/2013 at 8:04am - misc - by Unlucky Individual - United States (California)

Today, I went to visit my sister, who lives four hours away from me. I'd only just sat down on their couch when her husband told me I needed to leave so they could have sex. FML

#20666985
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36089) - you deserved it (2518)

On 05/16/2013 at 12:16pm - misc - by earplugsplease (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, my family flew out to surprise my grandma for her 70th birthday. When we arrived, she and my grandpa were both sitting on the couch, high, smoking a joint. FML

#20649343
19 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43841) - you deserved it (9417)

On 05/08/2013 at 2:59am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I tried to "trip" and fall into this guy I've had a crush on. I missed and fell on my face. He stepped over me and kept walking. FML

#20646330
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21299) - you deserved it (43009)

On 05/06/2013 at 8:45pm - misc - by clumsy - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I found out that my wife is having an affair with the same guy my ex-wife left me for. FML

#20645479
210 comments

I agree, your life sucks (74146) - you deserved it (4340)

On 05/06/2013 at 2:13pm - love - by Anonymous - Ireland (Donegal)

Today, I woke up to the sound of my newborn screaming. I frantically hopped out of bed and stumbled into the nursery where I was met by the priceless sight of my five-year-old daughter attempting to breastfeed her understandably frustrated little brother. FML

#20644821
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55183) - you deserved it (4752)

On 05/06/2013 at 2:29am - kids - by SkeetinKeaton (man) - United States

Today, my dumbass colleague was too lazy to go buy balloons for a party in recognition of our company's huge merger. Instead, he made condom balloons. Let's just say you don't make blow up condoms for a prestigious company event. A company whose CEO is named Dick. FML

#20642182
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45306) - you deserved it (3689)

On 05/05/2013 at 12:14am - work - by ADickySituation - United States (Illinois)

Today, my mom came back from a major surgery. She also had a yeast infection. I had to push the applicator in because she couldn't bend down. This cannot be unfelt. FML

#20641584
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43831) - you deserved it (2364)

On 05/04/2013 at 7:26pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (Virginia)

Today, I walked into the living room to find my 11-year-old daughter about to kiss her "not my boyfriend" on the lips. When I asked what she thought she was doing, she peeled a piece of scotch tape off her lips and said, "It's okay! We're using protection." FML

#20640565
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57252) - you deserved it (8121)

On 05/04/2013 at 8:51am - kids - by wtfmama (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, my boyfriend and I stressed out preparing for our one week holiday. We packed for the whole day, said goodbye to everyone and arrived at the airport quite exhausted after a 45-minute train ride. Turns out our flight isn't until tomorrow. The check-in lady couldn't stop laughing. FML

#20640490
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35313) - you deserved it (13163)

On 05/04/2013 at 6:24am - misc - by Tickettoride (woman) - Austria (Wien)

Today, I finally started exercising. I'm a rather obese person and I'm super pumped up to finally get off my lazy butt and lose some weight. Locking myself in my room, I first started with a very simple exercise: jumping jacks. I farted each time I jumped. I jumped 10 times. FML

#20640437
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39212) - you deserved it (9435)

On 05/04/2013 at 4:11am - health - by thatonesilentkidinclass (man) - Philippines (Batangas)

Today, I caught my 14-year-old daughter stealing alcohol from me. After berating her for half-an-hour I finally said, "At least you're not doing drugs." She gave me a guilty smile and sheepishly said, "At least I'm not a prostitute?" FML

#20640404
231 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53850) - you deserved it (10967)

On 05/04/2013 at 3:22am - kids - by prostitott -

Today, walking by myself, I was caught up in a group of people that got arrested, and we all got fined for creating a public disturbance. When I explained I wasn't with them, the group backed me up. The police thought I was the ringleader, and now I have to go to court. FML

#20639737
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52547) - you deserved it (2706)

On 05/03/2013 at 9:14pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Netherlands

Today, my boss fired me for acting "inappropriately" at work. I gave him a hug. He's my dad. FML

#20638777
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57120) - you deserved it (6621)

On 05/03/2013 at 11:00am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States



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