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emilystardawn

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emilystardawn

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  • Number of visits : 279
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  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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emilystardawn's FML badges

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

See all of emilystardawn's badges

emilystardawn's favorite FMLs

Today, another employee scolded me for being "socially awkward". The same employee who just before had a 10 minute discussion with a client about her poop. FML

#18557623
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23010) - you deserved it (2042)

On 12/19/2011 at 10:53pm - work - by me (woman) - United States

Today, I walked out of the store, car keys in hand, only to discover my car was missing. After a frantic search, I started to hyperventilate and a nearly had a full-blown panic attack. Then I remembered I walked to the store. I am an idiot. FML

#18460733
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21246) - you deserved it (29160)

On 12/08/2011 at 2:58pm - misc - by picklemonger - Canada

Today, I found that when a hot girl asks you whether you have a girlfriend, saying, "I got 99 problems but a bitch ain't one" is not the best way to proceed. FML

#18442495
231 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9912) - you deserved it (67286)

On 12/06/2011 at 1:45am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (London)

Today, my boyfriend dropped by my work to break up with me. I had to go the rest of my shift with a smile, fighting back tears. I work as the Cinderella at Disney Land. FML

#18358033
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (66654) - you deserved it (3230)

On 11/26/2011 at 4:54pm - love - by notsohappilyeverafter - United States (California)

Today, I rubbed my face in my armpit stubble because it felt like my ex-boyfriend's face. FML

#18342381
226 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13242) - you deserved it (46195)

On 11/24/2011 at 10:51pm - love - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was eating cereal while absentmindedly reading the box. I was amused when I found it expires on my birthday. Then I realized it expired on my birthday two years ago. FML

#18286852
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15285) - you deserved it (24256)

On 11/19/2011 at 3:40am - misc - by jerdub93 - United States (California)

Today, I went grocery shopping. Being a bartender, I had a huge wad of dollar bills from cash tips. As I was counting them at the register, I looked at the cashier and joked, "You probably think I'm a stripper or something." He looked me up and down and said, "Uh... hell no." FML

#18129165
196 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23550) - you deserved it (21581)

On 11/01/2011 at 1:52pm - misc - by bakedplum (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, was the last day of the prank war between me and my husband. I told him the last prank needed to be the best one. I took a shower and tried to think up my last prank. When I got out of the shower, my hair was green. FML

#18080621
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12253) - you deserved it (33663)

On 10/26/2011 at 1:56pm - misc - by mycedes - United States

Today, I got a complaint from my neighbor about a little girl staring at her through my guest bedroom window for the past month. I live alone. And now I'm scared to live in my own house. FML

#17349963
376 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53271) - you deserved it (3275)

On 08/03/2011 at 12:04am - misc - by soccerbuddyz - United States (Florida)

Today, while using the restroom at McDonald's, a hand reached under my stall and took the remaining toilet paper. FML

#17307885
213 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35301) - you deserved it (3569)

On 07/30/2011 at 10:07am - misc - by ewww - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I surprised my four year old daughter with a stuffed dinosaur. She named it 'Horny.' FML

#17145702
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34593) - you deserved it (7588)

On 07/17/2011 at 3:14am - kids - by douglas - United States (Washington)

Today, I was on a hot date. After we finished supper we went back to his place. My stomach started to feel upset so I politely asked where is bathroom was so I could "powder my nose". After ten minutes of agonizing diarrhea, I looked down and noticed he was out of toilet paper. FML

#17134367
200 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36212) - you deserved it (4413)

On 07/16/2011 at 9:18am - misc - by anonymous - Canada

Today, I dropped my camera into water. The good news is that it's waterproof. The bad news is I dropped it off London Bridge. All the pictures and videos of my four-month trip around Europe were on it. FML

#16708648
203 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41827) - you deserved it (10821)

On 06/17/2011 at 7:32am - misc - by catherine - United Kingdom (London)

Today, my mother-in-law visited the house while my husband and I were at work. When we returned, we discovered she'd shredded and thrown away all the scribbled on papers sprawled on our messy desks. We're graphics designers. Those were rough sketches for about 14 different clients. FML

#16605766
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42287) - you deserved it (3227)

On 06/11/2011 at 2:09am - misc - by Mirorbo (woman) - United States (California)

Today, after shopping alone at a grocery store, I was taking my groceries back to my car when a kid grabbed one of my bags and ran. Deciding not to risk leaving the rest of my groceries stranded, I didn't chase him. Later, I realized that was the bag my credit card was in. FML

#15943696
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29382) - you deserved it (15482)

On 04/27/2011 at 12:21am - money - by uncbballwins -



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