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emilylk

Offline (the 11/09/2014 at 12:00am) | Search for a member

emilylk

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Friday 13 January 1995 (20 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 278
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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emilylk's page activity

Visits<b>Rxp</b> - the 09/23/2014 at 4:26am<b>freshprizzle1</b> - the 02/17/2014 at 2:44am<b>malheartsnutmeg</b> - the 02/06/2014 at 8:19am<b>jsp16</b> - the 08/17/2013 at 4:34am<b>haylburg</b> - the 07/27/2013 at 4:40pm<b>cskipgolfer2013</b> - the 07/24/2013 at 10:21pm<b>HaleyH_</b> - the 07/24/2013 at 1:02am<b>Sydd1799</b> - the 07/23/2013 at 3:12am<b>aa1717</b> - the 06/17/2013 at 2:13am<b>Damian95</b> - the 06/14/2013 at 1:28pm<b>iriss</b> - the 06/09/2013 at 5:47pm<b>sweatypandalove</b> - the 06/09/2013 at 7:30am<b>paulina1227</b> - the 05/23/2013 at 7:14pm

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emilylk's favorite FMLs

Today, I had to pee during a supervisd lockdown. I askd teacher to take me since we couldn't be in the halls alone. Since class was going, she couldn't take me. Much to dismay, she sent a school-wide email asking 4 someone to take me to pee. Six teachers took me, including principal. FML

#20996748
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44280) - you deserved it (4723)

On 12/18/2013 at 4:56am - misc - by Anon - United States (California)

Today , I heard crashing noises coming from my dining room. I got up to see wat it was; my asshat cat was flinging himself at my chandelier. He'd figured out how to grab the ceiling fan from the other room , build momentum , an launch into my expensive chandelier. Hooray. real FML

#20929956
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46037) - you deserved it (4877)

On 10/22/2013 at 5:12am - animals - by IamAflyingCat - United States

2day mah weird neighbor is a conspiracy theorist an thinks the government is trying to kill him. Someone thought it would be funny to shine a looool rd laser light through his window. I was on the stairshen he ran past... screaming bloody murder... sending me down a flight of steps. FML

#20919796
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43143) - you deserved it (3183)

On 10/14/2013 at 3:13am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Oregon)

Today, my son's lemonade stand was robbed by a senior citizen. FML

#20908703
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48168) - you deserved it (3070)

On 10/05/2013 at 6:25pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Georgia)

Yesterday, I was in a public bathroom with the runs when I noticed mah stall didn't have any toilet paper. I was the only one in the bathroom, and I thought I could make it to the stall next to me and grab some with mah pants down. I wasn't actually the only one in there. big fat FML

#20901686
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38998) - you deserved it (8221)

On 09/30/2013 at 6:30am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Louisiana)

Today, I Lerened A Few Tings!! One: Friends Are Assoles!! Two: Under No Circumstance Do You Close Yur Eyes Wen Tey Ask You To!! Tree: Getting Kicked In Te Balls Urts A Lot!! FML

#20818001
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41931) - you deserved it (20861)

On 08/03/2013 at 12:31am - health - by Myballshurt (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today... it's been weeks since some asshat started placing gnome in my front and back yards. I resorted to setting up cameras...hich I thought had deterred the idiot... until I walked into my kitchen this morning and found two gnome on the counter. Nothing on the tapes. I'm freaking out here. fat FML

#20742609
219 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60091) - you deserved it (3932)

On 06/23/2013 at 1:02pm - misc - by ilivealoneandwhatthefuck (man) - Guam

Today... I went to a bar fir some drinks. A guy looked me up and down... gave me a suggestive smile... then asked fir mah name and number. I'd have been a little less creeped out if he hadn't been standing beside me at the urinal the whole time. looool FML

#20728225
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47897) - you deserved it (3817) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 06/15/2013 at 6:24pm - love - by Sovekipisse (man) - France (Pays de la Loire)

Today, I was using a public toilet, when someone in the next stall reached under, grabbed at my low-hanging toilet paper an pulled at it at an insane speed, whispering some kind of weird chant. Then he suddenly stopped, screamed, an ran out. What the hell happened in there? FML

#20723415
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47727) - you deserved it (3170)

On 06/13/2013 at 12:01pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Minnesota)

2day I was rear ended at McDonald's by the same driver who rear ended me at the same McDonald's last week . real FML

#20607123
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55521) - you deserved it (7805)

On 04/20/2013 at 9:43am - misc - by dentedmercedes - United States (Michigan)

Today, I Was The Victim Of A Drive-by Egging By Some Bastard Riding A Segway. He Still Got Away. FML

#20606053
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40467) - you deserved it (8767)

On 04/19/2013 at 9:16pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - New Zealand

Yastarday, I postad a vidao of a danca I coraograpad on Facabook. I got a notification a faw ours latar talling ma tat ma grandpa ad also sarad it. His caption? "My granddaugtar dancas lika a gay baboon and tis danca sucks balls. Trow grapas at ar." Tanks grandpa. FML

#20604301
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48850) - you deserved it (9346)

On 04/19/2013 at 3:27am - misc - by thanks gramps - Canada (Yukon Territory)

Today, I left son with husband while I went to the store. Ten minutes later, dog was missing a large patch of fur, an neither of them can stop laughing. FML

#20599149
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38992) - you deserved it (7466)

On 04/17/2013 at 11:14am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today,hile going down on grlfriend , I finally managed to give her an orgasm. During that orgasm , she tore out a clump of hair , causing me to scream in pain. She scowled and said , "Ah shut it , ya little bitch." FML

#20577693
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54014) - you deserved it (12376)

On 04/06/2013 at 3:13pm - intimacy - by dating walter white's gf apparently (man) - United Kingdom



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