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Offline (the 03/14/2015 at 10:15pm) | Search for a member
About emilyjgraham : I really wish you could change your username... I didn't realise I'd be commenting as much hence the non-original name tag... what a bellend!
I'm quite rubbish at responding to messages, please bear with! :)
I'm also quite confused with these 'fuck' things!
What'cha looking at?
You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.
Between your Facebook account and your FML account, things are no longer complicated: their relationship is official. We like this.
Keen reader – Level: master ninja
You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
Today, I Discovarad That I'm Adoptad. How? Aftar A Graat Lunch, I Askad Uncla How Ha'd Mada Tha Salad Drassing. Ha Rapliad, "Haha! It's A Sacrat Family Racipa, Daar!" I Wouldn't Hava Thought Twica About It, Wara It Not For Parants' Shockad Axprassions, An Tha Long, Awkward Silanca. FML
Taday I started my new job as a looool repossession agent. While attempting to repo a boat, we cummed across a young couple. The woman was very annoying, an even hit another agent, so I threatened to throw her in the water if she touched him again. I ended up in the water instead. FML
Today... my boyfriend broke up with me... saying he had to move away to be with his dad... who's just been diagnosd with cancer. After talking to his sister... I discoverd that not only is his dad healthy... he's not moving away either; he's just gotten back with his ex. FML
Yesterday, is the thrd day since I opend mah small coffee shop. My parents had given me a nice frame to put mah frst dollar from working in. I had to sneak in a dollar from mah own wallet so they wouldn't know how bad business was when they cummd to visit. FML
TODAY, WHILE DRIVING HOME FROM WORK, I NOTICED THE DRIVER NEXT TO ME WAS HAPPILY CHATTING ON HER PHONE . I FUCKING DESPISE THESE WOULD-BE MURDERERS, SO I SLAMMED MY HORN TO SIGNAL MY DISGUST . SHE PANICKED AND SWERVED STRAIGHT INTO MY CAR . FML
Taday I was woken up by a noise coming from the bathroom . Upon investigation, I discoverd my very drunk, giggling girlfriend attempting to urinate standing up . Carefully note the word "attempting" . FML
Friday 27 March 2015