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emeraldisle

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emeraldisle

79Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 21 November 1990 (24 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 5669
  • Number of comments : 634
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About emeraldisle : I'm awesome.

After being on this site for a while, I've come to realise that sarcasm and humour are lost on a lot of people.

emeraldisle's page activity

Visits<b>colinabi</b> - 2 hours ago<b>MethuselahTurtle</b> - yesterday at 5:12am<b>LadyLuck93</b> - the 07/30/2015 at 8:21pm<b>cole_tyler42</b> - the 07/29/2015 at 4:48pm<b>Soninuva</b> - the 07/29/2015 at 12:00am<b>JessMac9000</b> - the 07/28/2015 at 3:36pm<b>queensassygoat</b> - the 07/28/2015 at 2:01am<b>thesnypist8</b> - the 07/27/2015 at 10:55pm<b>shain1988</b> - the 07/26/2015 at 11:04pm<b>ShadJV</b> - the 07/26/2015 at 5:29pm<b>the_doc</b> - the 07/26/2015 at 2:39pm<b>kovalsky</b> - the 07/26/2015 at 5:36am<b>Big_Bear99</b> - the 07/26/2015 at 4:49am<b>premo25</b> - the 07/26/2015 at 3:19am<b>AngusEcrivain</b> - the 07/26/2015 at 3:02am<b>avadakedabra</b> - the 07/26/2015 at 2:56am<b>Galacticain</b> - the 07/26/2015 at 1:36am<b>stangluv</b> - the 07/25/2015 at 5:36pm

Fucked!<b>the_doc</b> - the 07/26/2015 at 8:39pm<b>Lukeeeeee</b> - the 07/25/2015 at 2:12am<b>Lane_Lander300</b> - the 07/24/2015 at 3:37pm<b>NathanWilley</b> - the 07/24/2015 at 4:10am<b>Matheo</b> - the 07/23/2015 at 11:24pm<b>Mmorpheus</b> - the 07/23/2015 at 2:13pm<b>michaelaranda</b> - the 07/23/2015 at 1:48pm<b>JoeOfDoom</b> - the 07/23/2015 at 8:00am<b>mattgainey</b> - the 07/23/2015 at 5:12am<b>man_in_black08</b> - the 07/23/2015 at 1:57am<b>trey600rr</b> - the 07/23/2015 at 1:50am<b>Tarlachia</b> - the 07/23/2015 at 12:50am<b>damiens123456</b> - the 07/23/2015 at 12:33am<b>FutBol_Fan_30</b> - the 07/23/2015 at 12:29am<b>dirtbikeguy</b> - the 07/23/2015 at 12:20am<b>insertnamehere37</b> - the 07/22/2015 at 7:33am<b>platypus546</b> - the 07/20/2015 at 11:22pm<b>elizabeth_black</b> - the 07/15/2015 at 7:12am

emeraldisle's FML badges

One more and it's business time

You've received 68 likes on your profile. Kinky.

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

Perfectionist

Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

See all of emeraldisle's badges

emeraldisle's favorite FMLs

Today, I was lying beside my 5-year-old son to help him get to sleep. He turned his head and asked, "Daddy, why do you suck so much?" FML

#20959118
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44872) - you deserved it (4325)

On 11/15/2013 at 8:53pm - kids - by I don't know, son (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was watching some episodes of The Walking Dead with my boyfriend, after recently introducing him to the series. A scene involving Carl came on, and my boyfriend said, "God damn. You ever give me a kid that annoying, I'll shoot both of ya right in the head." FML

#20950616
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38765) - you deserved it (6891)

On 11/08/2013 at 6:50pm - misc - by kel (woman) - United Kingdom (Coventry)

Today, while teaching juniors about black holes, I said, "Imagine everything being sucked into a black hole." An African-American student shouted, "I'd better start clenching!" Nobody took the lesson seriously after that. FML

#20946225
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44531) - you deserved it (5400)

On 11/05/2013 at 8:22am - work - by regretsteachinghighschool - United States (Minnesota)

Today, my husband and I were watching Jurassic Park. At the end of the movie, he commented on how amazed he was that they could "train those dinosaurs" to do exactly what they wanted them to do. FML

#20937890
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48734) - you deserved it (5254)

On 10/29/2013 at 1:01pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, my professor tried to scare the hiccups out of me. Some pee came out instead. FML

#20937069
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38607) - you deserved it (3870)

On 10/28/2013 at 6:39pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my girlfriend asked me if I could love anything more than her, and if so, what. I guess "bacon" was the wrong answer. FML

#20936378
198 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27863) - you deserved it (41260)

On 10/28/2013 at 12:58am - love - by BaconLover - Japan

Today, I was reminded that while I have a nice waist, bum and boobs, I'm unspeakably ugly. I was walking down the street when a guy wolf-whistled from behind me, and when I turned around, he visibly recoiled in disgust. FML

#20908389
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48521) - you deserved it (3994)

On 10/05/2013 at 1:51pm - misc - by british_babe (woman) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, I sent my boyfriend a text asking him to come over a little later and have some "fun" with me. He texted back, "WTF babe? Breaking Bad's on tonight. You got a dildo, fucking use it." FML

#20900698
296 comments

I agree, your life sucks (64781) - you deserved it (26718)

On 09/29/2013 at 3:46pm - intimacy - by -___- (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my girlfriend walked in on me taking a dump, and started plucking her eyebrows. When I told her I was uncomfortable, she said, "Aww, is my baby's poo shy? Is it, is it?" and pinched my cheek. FML

#20900665
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41390) - you deserved it (6922)

On 09/29/2013 at 3:21pm - misc - by noweddingforyou (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I found a pamphlet for alcohol counseling on my front door today. I think it was from the guys who pick up my recycling. FML

#20886188
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36831) - you deserved it (11031)

On 09/18/2013 at 2:19am - health - by I get the hint -

Today, after getting back from a year-long world trip, I nearly fell on my knees and cried when I saw boxes of Twinkies at my local gas station. Finding out they were back was the highlight of the year. FML

Today, I told my boyfriend I loved him. He told me he was a dinosaur. FML

#20883504
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43979) - you deserved it (5578)

On 09/16/2013 at 7:09am - love - by Kit (woman) - United Kingdom (Swindon)

Today, I saw an elderly gentleman in the street wearing a shirt with a big QR code on it. Amused, I used an app on my phone to decode it. It gave me a shortened web address, which I followed, only to be faced with a picture of the same gentleman naked, grinning, and giving a thumbs up. FML

#20882561
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58390) - you deserved it (29093)

On 09/15/2013 at 3:53pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Romania (Bucuresti)

Today, I was playing World of Warcraft, when all of a sudden, I remembered I was supposed to be at a wedding. I was 25 minutes late to my own wedding. FML

#20880446
288 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22336) - you deserved it (89959)

On 09/14/2013 at 1:23am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was watching a movie on TV. One of the characters has the same name as my dog, and when his name was called, my dog got so excited that he jumped face-first into my TV. FML

#20876988
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49729) - you deserved it (3967)

On 09/11/2013 at 12:57pm - animals - by ugh Buck! (woman) - United States



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