About emavckri655 : not much to say really (-:
How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/
Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend. I really get off on hearing her say my name so I was imagining her doing so more often than she actually was. I then called out my own name by accident. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22433) - you deserved it (76626)
On 05/07/2009 at 10:45am - intimacy - by eeh (woman) - United States (Ohio)
Today, I was at my boyfriend's house.I've been a vegetarian for 4 years, and his mother made lasagna with meat in it. After telling her I don't eat meat, my boyfriend's father says "we know whose meat she does eat." My boyfriend, his mother, and I were standing right there. FML
I agree, your life sucks (60362) - you deserved it (7038)
On 04/29/2009 at 10:09pm - intimacy - by ohmyx3 (woman) - United States (Connecticut)
Today, I sang my signature tune at a karaoke bar - What A Wonderful World - and I thought I sounded my best yet. After my performance, I went outside to get some air. Then, I got assaulted in the parking lot and ended up going to the hospital. What a wonderful world indeed. FML
I agree, your life sucks (45734) - you deserved it (3710)
On 04/23/2009 at 12:42am - misc - by karaokestar (man) - Canada (Alberta)
Today, my friends and I were celebrating Spring Break by going out to a club. I saw a very, very cute girl sipping a drink at the bar all by herself. Trying to be a stud I walked over and said "What are you doing Friday night?" Her response: "Not you." FML
I agree, your life sucks (19605) - you deserved it (58648)
On 04/23/2009 at 12:20am - intimacy - by rejected (man) - United States (Nevada)
Today, I was talking to my hot neighbor. We were in the driveway of her house, and I looked at her car and noticed a hideous dummy. It was fat and just ugly, but I didn't think much of it. I tried to make a joke and asked, "Where did you get that awful thing?" She said, "That's my daughter". FML
I agree, your life sucks (7913) - you deserved it (67083)
On 04/22/2009 at 11:11pm - misc - by brob56 (man) - United States (Tennessee)
Today, I spotted one of my friends using the ATM outside our school's university center. I crept up behind him, grabbed his shoulders abruptly, and shouted in my best deep man-voice, "Give me all your money!" Turned out to be a poor, unsuspecting freshman. He gave me his money. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8586) - you deserved it (51979)
On 04/22/2009 at 10:22pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)
Today, I was talking to a swimmer I just met. I saw a cute guy and whispered to her "that guy is hot." She asked "Who?" I pointed at him. She turned to see him, then turned back to me and said "Ew, thats my brother." She went to him, whispered something. He turned around to see me and said "EW." FML
I agree, your life sucks (44414) - you deserved it (5268)
On 04/22/2009 at 9:58pm - love - by uglyswimmer (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, my grandma and I were watching the Ranger's playoff game. As Henrik Lundqvist received a standing ovation from the crowd after blocking 38 shots, she says to me, "Check out his equipment!" My 80-year old grandma just commented on Henrik Lundqvist's package. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30823) - you deserved it (3339)
On 04/22/2009 at 9:46pm - misc - by anonymous (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I went to my son's soccer game. I cheered his name at the top my lungs and waved with a grin on my face. I saw him whisper something to a team mate so I watched the film my husband took later that night. His friend asked, "Who is that?" and my son replied, "I don't know some fat bitch." FML
I agree, your life sucks (79760) - you deserved it (12414)
On 04/22/2009 at 5:46pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)
Today, as I caught the train home, a woman got on and sat on the only available seat next to me. We got talking and as the train approached the next station, she said that this was her stop and she had to go. She exited the train and I turn to see her enter the compartment behind me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (42126) - you deserved it (6275)
On 04/22/2009 at 3:48am - misc - by DonMare (man) - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, I was hanging out with this guy I've been trying to get for four months. I felt like I needed to go to the bathroom. I walked out, glad that I was quiet about it. Ten minutes later, my mom walks out of the same bathroom and goes "Honey, you need to spray after you make a stinky" FML
I agree, your life sucks (47337) - you deserved it (3633)
On 04/22/2009 at 12:37am - misc - by stanky (woman) - United States (Washington)
Today, I told my morbidly obese teacher that he had mustard on his chin. He tried to wipe it off and I said without thinking "No, your other chin." FML
I agree, your life sucks (30746) - you deserved it (75107)
On 04/21/2009 at 1:42am - misc - by anonymous (man) - United States (California)
Today, my hamster gave birth. The babies were very cute and I couldn't resist petting one. Apparently touching a baby hamster will cause it's mother to reject and devour it. I am now know in my family as "The Hamster Slaughterer." FML
I agree, your life sucks (44522) - you deserved it (18339)
On 04/20/2009 at 11:11pm - animals - by whymommywhy (man) - United States (New Hampshire)
Today, I was playing and laughing with my new baby boy. He was giggling, and it was adorable. Out of nowhere I say "you're my favorite!". Now I'm sitting here talking to my two other children about how what I said earlier I didn't mean personally. They never want to talk to me again. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11369) - you deserved it (101920)
On 04/20/2009 at 10:39pm - kids - by Damnlife123 (woman) - United States (Minnesota)
Today, I found out that I'm pregnant. My husband and I have been trying to have a baby for a while, and I was very excited to tell him the news. When I opened his office planning to surprise him with the news, I saw him making out with a man. FML
I agree, your life sucks (382276) - you deserved it (21596)
On 04/19/2009 at 12:05am - intimacy - by soontobedivorced (woman) - United States (New York)
Friday 24 May 2013
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