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elnorris14

Offline (the 07/08/2014 at 2:28am) | Search for a member

elnorris14

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 14 February 1988 (26 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 141
  • Number of comments : 15
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About elnorris14 : chill out, relax

elnorris14's page activity

Visits<b>grogers311</b> - the 04/27/2014 at 1:49pm<b>the1pumpCHUMP</b> - the 04/26/2014 at 8:04pm<b>msmama1985</b> - the 04/26/2014 at 6:49pm<b>dynojay</b> - the 04/26/2014 at 3:19pm<b>PrimeEvilTahir</b> - the 04/19/2014 at 9:19am<b>maximus_prime</b> - the 04/11/2014 at 10:39am<b>soccerforlife_27</b> - the 04/06/2014 at 2:42pm<b>jgilmanx13</b> - the 04/05/2014 at 4:30pm<b>terryaly</b> - the 04/05/2014 at 1:32pm<b>Welshite</b> - the 02/25/2014 at 8:12am<b>Baucis</b> - the 01/29/2014 at 10:57pm<b>BeautifulChaos27</b> - the 01/29/2014 at 5:28pm<b>nightowl713</b> - the 01/25/2014 at 2:49pm<b>jizzwold</b> - the 01/20/2014 at 5:38am<b>Booda_Shun</b> - the 11/13/2013 at 2:54am

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elnorris14's favorite FMLs

Today, my girlfriend asked me where I've always wanted to settle down, and I told her that Italy had always appealed to me. She snorted and told me what a bad idea that was, because "you don't speak French". FML

Today, we had a guy come into the hospital with a carrot stuck deep in his anus. I've heard all kinds of ridiculous cover stories, but his took the cake; he claimed the phone rang while he was showering and he slipped onto a box of vegetables. Guess who had to extract the carrot. FML

#21179512
172 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51893) - you deserved it (4562)

On 06/18/2014 at 3:06pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, one of my year 9 students finished the test an hour early. He decided to spend the time by "stealthily" whacking off. His entire desk was shaking in a silent room. FML

Today, due to my short temper, I punched myself in the nose because I wouldn't stop sneezing. FML

#21116112
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21809) - you deserved it (53718)

On 04/18/2014 at 7:09am - health - by Ow (man) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I walked into my apartment and smelled something extremely repugnant. I asked my roommate what had happened and she said, "I didn't know how else to kill it!" She'd trapped a bat that was in our apartment, put it in the oven, and set it to 400 degrees. FML

#21067130
273 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48830) - you deserved it (3926)

On 02/20/2014 at 11:10pm - misc - by BakedBat (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I found out the real reason my boyfriend kept starting fights with me, and why my best friend kept telling me to break up with him. It was so they could turn their affair into a proper relationship, then twist it around to make me look like a bitch for dumping him. FML

#21058247
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59173) - you deserved it (4376)

On 02/12/2014 at 4:25pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia

Today, I found a Google search for "erectile dysfunction" in my browser search history, along with pages about treatments for it. I'm a woman, and I live alone. FML

#21049445
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44845) - you deserved it (3403)

On 02/03/2014 at 4:16pm - misc - by jai90 (woman) - Netherlands (Utrecht)

Today, I found out that whenever my ex-wife is late getting the kids to school, she tells them to tell their teachers they were with me, and forges my name on the sign-in sheet. Missing homework? Dad's house. Forgot to bring something important? Ditto. The school thinks I'm a horrible parent. FML

Today, I joked with a pregnant girl in a state juvenile correctional facility where I work that eating a lot of candy would damage the unborn baby's teeth. Without batting an eye, she responded that she would simply "eat some toothpaste after the candy." FML

Today, I woke up from a drunken one-night-stand. The person I slept with turned out to be heavily pregnant. She tried to convince me that I am the father and that I passed out for 7 months. FML

Today, I was mentioning to a coworker how there was a huge lull today in business. A young coworker then turns to me and says in a snooty tone, "I think you mean a 'lol', it's pronounced L-O-L." FML

#20953649
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42525) - you deserved it (2804)

On 11/11/2013 at 5:36am - work - by shut up. - New Zealand

Today, I was uninvited to a bachelorette party. I wouldn't really care, if the party hadn't been for me, ahead of my wedding tomorrow. FML

#20885218
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44294) - you deserved it (3477)

On 09/17/2013 at 1:52pm - love - by anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I was playing Charades with my boyfriend's family. When it was his turn, he pointed at me. His mother said "Bitch?". The answer was "relationship". FML

#20848780
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52556) - you deserved it (3825)

On 08/22/2013 at 12:40am - love - by Embarrassed (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I found out that the same police officer who has arrested me twice has been sleeping with my wife. FML

#20731650
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (74079) - you deserved it (6758)

On 06/17/2013 at 3:56pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, after my boyfriend promised he wasn't cheating on me, I ran into him at our favorite coffee shop with the girl I suspected him of cheating with. When I confronted them, he acted like he didn't know me. FML

#20561087
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47536) - you deserved it (3885)

On 03/26/2013 at 3:04pm - love - by Megan - United States



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