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Offline (the 12/04/2016 at 9:00am)



  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 30 August 2000 (16 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 975
  • Number of comments : 16
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 8 posted

About eliiteXXXninja : Jamaican 🇯🇲
From The 2️⃣0️⃣1️⃣

eliiteXXXninja's page activity

Visits<b>yoursmileishawt</b> - the 12/02/2016 at 11:29pm<b>dburton</b> - the 08/30/2016 at 4:46pm<b>mattcy1</b> - the 08/21/2016 at 4:55pm<b>Becca34</b> - the 08/05/2016 at 12:43pm<b>Taymoo1515</b> - the 04/15/2016 at 12:00pm<b>SpookySweetie</b> - the 03/21/2016 at 4:58am<b>amandaadivitaa</b> - the 03/19/2016 at 10:20pm<b>goldengirlsfan</b> - the 03/19/2016 at 4:48pm<b>IWeigh2Tons</b> - the 03/19/2016 at 4:00pm<b>dudeutookhrs</b> - the 03/18/2016 at 1:33pm<b>NoBothersForMe</b> - the 03/14/2016 at 6:52am<b>stfuwtf</b> - the 03/11/2016 at 11:02pm<b>trellz17</b> - the 03/11/2016 at 10:41pm<b>austinsixx1994</b> - the 03/11/2016 at 10:55am<b>trevieh47</b> - the 03/10/2016 at 5:45pm<b>supermarxiste75</b> - the 03/10/2016 at 3:00pm<b>pasupathymuthu</b> - the 03/10/2016 at 10:56am<b>sabby7</b> - the 03/09/2016 at 12:16am

Fucked!<b>dudeutookhrs</b> - the 03/18/2016 at 6:33pm<b>yellow33</b> - the 01/26/2016 at 8:56am<b>Ahyuenhsia</b> - the 01/18/2016 at 1:00am<b>epicx22</b> - the 01/01/2016 at 7:56pm<b>OysterPearls</b> - the 10/19/2015 at 4:15am<b>Mons</b> - the 10/13/2015 at 8:15am<b>winterforever97</b> - the 07/26/2015 at 5:13am<b>RWBYRose</b> - the 07/25/2015 at 9:41pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 07/25/2015 at 8:17pm

eliiteXXXninja's FML badges

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

What'cha looking at?

You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.

See all of eliiteXXXninja's badges

eliiteXXXninja's favorite FMLs

Today, my girlfriend of 5 years gave me the "I'm not in love with you anymore" speech. I saw it coming, so I'd planned to play it cool by saying, "If you're sure it's something we can't fix, I'd rather not talk about it". After a while, I realised I was just sitting there like a child, fidgeting and shaking. FML

by Satch / 03/16/2016 at 5:04am / Australia (Victoria) / Love

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I forgot my phone on the roof of my car. I took a 30 minute drive from my friend's city to my city. I got on to my driveway, surprised to see my phone still there. Thinking I'm really lucky, I pick up my phone. Then, I trip over a pebble, cracking my phone in the process. FML

by Anonymous / 03/11/2016 at 7:20am / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous

Today, while I was working at a sushi restaurant, a guy told me he wanted the table next to the "koi fish tank", because he wanted to let the fish know what happens when they "cross him". FML

by IhadToTakeCareOfTraumatizedFish / 03/03/2016 at 12:32am / United States (Texas) / Work

Today, some muscle-head showed up at my house and started beating on me. Turned out my son had been posing online as a Navy SEAL, using a picture of me, and had dared this guy to come over and fight him. FML

by Anonymous / 03/02/2016 at 12:54pm / United States (Iowa) / Health

Today, I was going to have sex with my boyfriend for the first time. He couldn't get hard and pouted about it for nearly two hours. When I went to comfort him, he said "Man, I hope I'm not gay." FML

by Anonymous / 01/14/2016 at 11:51pm / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, my son told me that he doesn't need to go to school because he doesn't need a job. It turns out he plans to get a life sentence in prison and live the rest of his life at the taxpayers' expense. FML

by Anonymous / 10/11/2015 at 12:20am / Canada (Alberta) / Kids

Today, I introduced my girlfriend to my parents over lunch. Unfortunately, I showed my dad her Facebook profile beforehand and he wouldn't stop making cracks about her duckfacing. It started with "Don't let her eat the bread, it'll puff up in her stomach and kill her", and ended in tears. FML

by iskalion / 10/10/2015 at 1:39am / Canada (Alberta) / Miscellaneous

Today, after saying I'd edit and revise a coworker's report so he could go home and spend his anniversary with his wife, he sent me a file. Upon opening it, it was pictures of men wearing strange fetish gear while being dominated. He has yet to send me the correct file and I'm scared to ask. FML

by Anonymous / 09/28/2015 at 4:33pm / United States (Nevada) / Work

Today, my dad introduced me as his pet orangutan. I'm a redhead. FML

by philosophicallll / 09/28/2015 at 4:25pm / South Africa (Western Cape) / Animals

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, with the most certainty and confidence that I have ever seen in her, my 16-year-old daughter told me an egg is a fruit because of its "hard shell and growing seed." FML

by Failed_Dad / 09/25/2015 at 1:42am / United States (California) / Kids

Today, I found out the girl I met online, who I spent hours talking to every day for the past 2 months, and who I fell in love with is actually my gay roomate. He says if I could fall in love with "her", I can fall in love with him. It doesn't work that way, dickhead. FML

by Anonymous / 08/19/2015 at 2:32am / Canada (Saskatchewan) / Love

Today, I got fired, apparently for being racist to black people. When I told my boyfriend, he couldn't stop laughing. He's black. FML

by Razz / 07/15/2015 at 6:02pm / Australia (Victoria) / Miscellaneous

Today, I woke up in my living room after having a party. I then realized my fish tank with many different species was missing from its usual spot. After searching for a few minutes, I finally found it in the freezer. FML

by Anonymous / 05/25/2015 at 12:10pm / Canada (Ontario) / Animals

Today, was my first experience having sex. It was also my first experience with a condom breaking. FML

by Vexatious / 05/22/2015 at 12:27pm / United States (North Carolina) / Intimacy

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I came home to find my dad drinking. Trying to be cheerful, I greeted him with a "Hi, dad!" He sighed, shook his head, and said "It hurts me when you call me that." FML

by Anonymous / 05/15/2015 at 7:55pm / United States / Miscellaneous