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Today, I was working retail when a group of older gentlemen came in looking for a good sound system. I showed them a top-range system and gushed about it in detail, trying to close the sale. One of them snorted and said, "See Dave, girls like her are the reason ball gags were invented." FML
I agree, your life sucks (17752) - you deserved it (2502)
On 03/12/2012 at 11:10pm - work - by sandi519 (woman) - United States
Today, I'd had it with my mom's addiction to weed, so I told her to choose between me or the weed. I'm currently looking on Craigslist for an apartment. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28034) - you deserved it (9095)
On 12/15/2011 at 10:55pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I found my husband Googling Morse Code. He thinks his farts are trying to communicate with him. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24709) - you deserved it (2529)
On 08/29/2011 at 11:38am - health - by KJL - United States
Today, I came home to find a window broken and my neighbours searching inside my house. Apparently, they'd heard a small child asking for help inside my house. I recently taught my dog to "talk." FML
I agree, your life sucks (20348) - you deserved it (3840)
On 08/15/2011 at 2:23am - animals - by Mumbling Mutt101 (woman) - Australia (Western Australia)
TODAY, I PRESSED CAPS LOCK ON MY LAPTOP AND THE KEY GOT STUCK. NOW ALL OF MY LETTERS ARE IN CAPITAL LETTERS. I HAVE TRIED EVERYTHING. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30169) - you deserved it (24882)
On 03/21/2011 at 1:32pm - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Wiltshire)
Today, I watched my grandfather try and park his car inside the storage area for shopping carts, thinking it was a parking space. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19807) - you deserved it (2722)
On 02/11/2011 at 10:46am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, I confessed to my best friend that I love him and always have. He whispered to himself, "Why do the fat chicks always want me?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (32938) - you deserved it (6341)
On 11/17/2010 at 3:03am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I was rushed to the hospital to deliver my child. On the way, I called my husband who was in a bar with his friends. Drunk, he just yelled, "BROS BEFORE HOS!!" and hung up. FML
I agree, your life sucks (59554) - you deserved it (6011)
On 10/04/2010 at 5:42pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Quebec)
Today, I tried to cut layers in my beautiful long hair. I ended up giving myself a mullet. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8512) - you deserved it (59340)
On 06/15/2010 at 2:35am - misc - by heyfuckyouthen (woman) - United States (Florida)
Today, I applied for my job, while working at my job. I hope they hire me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15764) - you deserved it (4068)
On 03/17/2010 at 10:12pm - work - by TheSuregeon (man) - United States (Kentucky)
Today, I decided to have sex with with my boyfriend. After we had finished I jokingly said, "who's going to sleep in the wet patch?". He got up and said "you're optimistic, I'm not staying. Oh, and I'm dumping you, that performance was disappointing". It was my first time. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23006) - you deserved it (2725)
On 02/15/2010 at 8:28am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (London)
Today, I allowed my friend to talk me into going on a date. The guy's truck smelled like formaldehyde - I'm assuming from the snake that he apparently tried to turn into a necklace. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17456) - you deserved it (2028)
On 12/28/2009 at 1:26am - love - by KittyNeko (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, at work a female co-worker was struggling with a stack of boxes in her hands. Her pantyhose was falling down and she asked me to help her. So I pulled up her pantyhose. When I looked up, she had a horrified look on her face. She was asking me to help her hold the boxes. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5400) - you deserved it (36222)
On 12/25/2009 at 3:10am - work - by harrassment101 (man) - United States (California)
Today, my 6 year old daughter asked me if the tooth fairy was real. I said yes, and she said she wanted to try to catch her. Later, she pulled out a tooth and put it under her pillow. I came in to take out the tooth and replace it with money. There were mouse traps behind her pillow. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24947) - you deserved it (6614)
On 11/12/2009 at 11:19pm - kids - by snapped (woman) - United States (Virginia)
Today, I walked into the kitchen and saw a note my roomate posted. As I got close to read it I was attacked by a very pissed off cat. The note said "Left window open last night, stray cat got in. Watch out he isn't friendly." FML
I agree, your life sucks (35048) - you deserved it (2108)
On 09/01/2009 at 2:51pm - animals - by Catscratch (man) - United States (California)
Monday 20 May 2013
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