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electric_waffle's FML badges
Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!
It’s in the can
Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!
I moderated this!
In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!
electric_waffle's favorite FMLs
Today, during some previews before the new Harry Potter movie, a guy stood up and led the audience in an enthusiastic and rather successful chant "H-A-R-R-Y!". Minutes later when I attempted to do the same thing, I was pelted with half-full bags of popcorn, freezing sodas, and booing. FML
by Chelsea / 07/20/2009 at 1:54am / United States (New Jersey) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was going to have sex with my Hispanic boyfriend. I wanted to turn him on, so I asked my friend how to say "fuck me" in Spanish. She claimed it was 'pollo frito'. I then had sex, constantly screaming 'pollo frito' for an hour. I later realized I was screaming "fried chicken." FML
by FML.. / 04/06/2009 at 3:51pm / China (Hebei) / Intimacy
Today, I was driving down the road when I got to a red light. I looked over and saw a hot chick in a convertible so I spoke to my window thinking she couldn't hear me "Hey girl, I may have a tiny dick but I make up for it in speed and stamina." She looked over. I forgot about the sunroof. FML
by Smash_Mouth / 03/08/2009 at 12:36am / United States (Florida) / Intimacy
Today, I woke up at my boyfriend's place with grumbling stomach pains. I left him in bed to go have explosive diarreah in the bathroom next to his room. When I was done, I came back to bed and snuggled in next to his sleeping form and he rolled over to whisper, "I heard everthing." FML
by ohmygoodness / 03/02/2009 at 4:51pm / United States (Ohio) / Love
- Today, I send a text message to my ex-boyfriend, who dumped me four months ago, telling him to come… Today, I was at my girlfriends house. After having sex, we went downstairs to where the rest of the… Today, my father described my method of hiding porn on the computer as "extremely naive." I don't…
- Today while walking to the shop under the blistering African sun, I stepped on something that stuck… Today, my crush got together with a dude on my 18th birthday party after I tried my best to win her… Today, I can't seem to get a job after going for more than 20 interviews over the last two months.…