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ekdfml

Offline (the 03/01/2015 at 5:14am) | Search for a member

ekdfml

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 26 January 1994 (21 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 7942
  • Number of comments : 23
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 37 posted

About ekdfml : Clutzy college student

ekdfml's page activity

Visits<b>codyflanders2008</b> - the 02/02/2015 at 10:01pm<b>Zach_attack_</b> - the 01/05/2015 at 1:45pm<b>americanafrican</b> - the 12/24/2014 at 3:38am<b>sevennfam</b> - the 12/21/2014 at 5:46am<b>mariannezr</b> - the 12/20/2014 at 9:18pm<b>DaiCarmuhh</b> - the 12/20/2014 at 5:25pm<b>phoneaddict13</b> - the 12/20/2014 at 12:14pm<b>Mario_mane</b> - the 12/20/2014 at 10:05am<b>mazdatuner09</b> - the 12/19/2014 at 9:06pm<b>ljkanon</b> - the 12/19/2014 at 5:55pm<b>robsmit98</b> - the 12/19/2014 at 5:33pm<b>HairIsEverything</b> - the 12/19/2014 at 1:37pm<b>SurfingPichu</b> - the 12/19/2014 at 12:41pm<b>sdlr32787</b> - the 12/19/2014 at 11:19am<b>mmahone9</b> - the 12/19/2014 at 9:54am<b>morondon000</b> - the 12/19/2014 at 9:04am<b>Steve97</b> - the 12/19/2014 at 8:37am<b>Bulldozer36</b> - the 12/19/2014 at 8:21am

ekdfml's FML badges

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

See all of ekdfml's badges

ekdfml's favorite FMLs

Today, I sharted during my wedding vows. FML

#21365151
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35624) - you deserved it (4425)

On 02/28/2015 at 9:16am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Denmark (Nordjylland)

Today, I ordered Chinese and told them I was allergic to eggs. I took a bite and I found some egg, quickly spat it out and took my antihistamines. When I returned with it and complained about my potential demise, they gave me a free orange to apologise. I'm allergic to oranges. FML

#21361977
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29361) - you deserved it (4982)

On 02/23/2015 at 7:08pm - health - by hatemebeforetheyevenhatch (woman) - United Kingdom (West Dunbartonshire)

Today, I hit my head on the steering wheel when I sneezed. I managed to honk the horn and the guy next to me couldn't stop laughing. FML

#21361311
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31306) - you deserved it (4506)

On 02/22/2015 at 8:41pm - misc - by headache - United States

Today, after swallowing my birth control pill, I threw up all over myself. I then had to search through my puke to find my birth control pill and attempt to re-take it. FML

Today, a guy attacked me and tried to steal my bag. I tried to defend myself by biting him as hard as I could. I then woke up to my husband screaming in pain. FML

#21360466
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32654) - you deserved it (3893)

On 02/21/2015 at 3:28pm - misc - by poncho55 (woman) -

Today, my girlfriend got her wisdom teeth removed. I really want to help her out while she recovers, but her swollen cheeks combined with her natural buck teeth keep making me crack up every time I see her. I can't help it and I'm now in the doghouse. FML

#21360286
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21758) - you deserved it (27604)

On 02/21/2015 at 9:20am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Birmingham)

Today, I witnessed the beautiful sight of a tiny baby bird struggling to take flight from its nest. "You can do it," I muttered, which I guess my asswipe of a cat heard as "Quick, go kill that bird and scar me for life, please." FML

#21360123
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27962) - you deserved it (3742)

On 02/20/2015 at 11:25pm - animals - by tulisa (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I threw up on a police officer who was trying to do a random breath test. I wasn't drunk or hungover. I'm pregnant and suffering morning sickness. FML

#21356993
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32183) - you deserved it (2028)

On 02/15/2015 at 10:25pm - misc - by Anonymous - Australia (Queensland)

Today, my boyfriend and I had sex for the first time. I'm extremely uncomfortable with eye contact, but he kept staring into my eyes the entire time. I had to sing the F.U.N. song from Spongebob in my head to stop myself having an anxiety attack. FML

#21356336
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34984) - you deserved it (4938)

On 02/14/2015 at 10:41pm - intimacy - by jessybear777 - United States (Missouri)

Today, my youngest daughter finally started using the toilet on her own. That is, until her older sister showed her the South Park episode where someone gets their intestines sucked out by flushing the toilet. Now she won't go anywhere near the bathroom. FML

#21355782
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30899) - you deserved it (2924)

On 02/14/2015 at 4:46am - kids - by Investing in Toilet Seatbelts - United States (Nevada)

Today, my grandma rushed into my work and told my manager I had to leave due to a family emergency. Panicked, I ran to get my stuff and ran to the car. When I asked what had happened, she replied, "I needed someone to go see 50 Shades of Grey with me." FML

#21355550
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33076) - you deserved it (3377)

On 02/13/2015 at 8:27pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I had to fall asleep to my next-door neighbors having sex because our walls are paper thin. What bothered me the most wasn't listening to them doing it, but knowing that she was faking it. FML

#21354562
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31638) - you deserved it (2753)

On 02/12/2015 at 2:39am - intimacy - by Mkimmi (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my bed fell through my floor. With me on it. FML

#21352624
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34097) - you deserved it (3038)

On 02/09/2015 at 8:26am - misc - by wtf?? - Saint Vincent and the Grenadines

Today, I went paintballing with my siblings. Once we were done, they realised I hadn't been shot at all. They cornered me in the forest and lit me up. I have welts all over my legs. FML

#21352130
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27363) - you deserved it (3942)

On 02/08/2015 at 2:46pm - health - by walllflower - Canada (Ontario)

Today, while shopping with my 6-year-old daughter, she said, "Mommy, remember you wanna get duck tape!" A middle-aged guy nearby scoffed and told her: "DUCT, not DUCK. Dumb cunt." I ended up having to drive my bawling daughter home with no shopping. FML

#21352119
290 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43258) - you deserved it (2978)

On 02/08/2015 at 2:16pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) -



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  • Another month, another bunch of shitposts. Yes, it's time to delve into the postbag and have another look at the weird and wonderful stuff we've been sent by people from all over the world. Hope you…

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