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ekdfml

Offline (the 10/29/2014 at 5:14am) | Search for a member

ekdfml

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 26 January 1994 (20 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 4990
  • Number of comments : 22
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 32 posted

About ekdfml : Clutzy college student

ekdfml's page activity

Visits<b>dimos4ever</b> - the 09/08/2014 at 7:23pm<b>macncheeze97</b> - the 08/03/2014 at 12:52pm<b>alexmisty88</b> - the 05/19/2014 at 3:36am<b>davered89</b> - the 05/12/2014 at 8:55pm<b>Mynamewontfi</b> - the 03/06/2014 at 3:53pm<b>elevensysix</b> - the 05/10/2013 at 1:19pm<b>XxXkyttiXxX</b> - the 02/22/2013 at 9:36am<b>Isoldael</b> - the 12/25/2012 at 6:04pm<b>phatdaddy62</b> - the 08/23/2011 at 4:10pm<b>Taipan</b> - the 12/14/2010 at 12:00pm<b>Zikk</b> - the 12/14/2010 at 3:14am

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ekdfml's favorite FMLs

Today, my boss asked about the mass of deep scratches on my arm. I lied and told him it happened while I was trying to save my cat from a tree. Truth is, my cat is a sadistic asshole who stalks me and mauls me whenever he can. FML

#21286814
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27808) - you deserved it (4528)

On 10/28/2014 at 3:40am - animals - by thewrittenrebel - South Africa (Western Cape)

Today, I reprimanded three students for sleeping, five for not having books, and kicked three out for texting in class. One student yelled at me for a bad grade, and another stormed out for a failing exam score. I teach at a four-year university. FML

Today, I strained so hard while on the toilet that I gave myself a nosebleed. FML

#21286665
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25739) - you deserved it (4499)

On 10/27/2014 at 11:00pm - health - by Discipl (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I took my girlfriend for what I thought would be a romantic horse-drawn carriage ride. We didn't expect the horse to die in the middle of it. FML

#21286332
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43241) - you deserved it (3256)

On 10/27/2014 at 2:48pm - love - by subduedbeast - United States

Today, I watched my co-worker throw the mother of all temper tantrums. He's a radio personality, and just learned that he's not famous enough to use the "Don't you know who I am?" line to get out of a traffic ticket. FML

#21286268
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27596) - you deserved it (2512)

On 10/27/2014 at 12:25pm - work - by Radio GaGa (man) - Canada

Today, I stumbled across one of my son's English assignments. Apparently, he decided to submit a haiku about how electrical outlets are technically "whores" because they hook up with countless cords for a "charge." I don't know whether to be amused or furious. FML

#21285975
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30081) - you deserved it (4358)

On 10/26/2014 at 10:42pm - kids - by MySonThePoet (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I gave birth to my first child. The first thing my husband says? "When can I hit it again, doc?" FML

#21280942
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34025) - you deserved it (4277)

On 10/19/2014 at 7:22am - kids - by how about never? (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I woke up to my daughter crying, and my son running through the living room completely naked with her bottle, laughing his head off. FML

#21279992
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28676) - you deserved it (3053)

On 10/17/2014 at 6:30pm - kids - by KayyElOh94 - United States

Today, my boyfriend tried to rid me of my hiccups. As he'd screamed at me and I'd pissed my pants, I just burst into tears. FML

#21279967
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28889) - you deserved it (3325)

On 10/17/2014 at 4:12pm - health - by catt - Germany (Berlin)

Today, I climbed onto my boyfriend's lap and sexily told him "It's getting hot in here," and started unbuttoning my shirt. He said "Oh," pushed me off him, and went to turn the ceiling fan on. FML

#21279866
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37515) - you deserved it (5425)

On 10/17/2014 at 2:29pm - intimacy - by gettinghotinhere - United States (California)

Today, I rode my new motorcycle to work for the first time. As I accelerated, I felt a sharp pain in my neck. Apparently, poisonous spiders can actually get trapped inside motorbike helmets. Duly noted. FML

Today, my boyfriend gave his penis a high five for not getting me pregnant. He does this every time I get my period. Every. Single. Time. FML

#21279390
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37152) - you deserved it (5870)

On 10/16/2014 at 9:27pm - love - by highfive - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I was driving with my grandma and she was going 30 over the speed limit. To slow her down, I said, "Hey look, the police". She slammed on the brakes so hard I hit my head on the dashboard. FML

#21279207
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31324) - you deserved it (15539)

On 10/16/2014 at 4:56pm - misc - by karmaaa - United States (Iowa)

Today, I walked into my house and saw it was flooded. I went upstairs to the bathroom to see the toilet overflowing and my boyfriend holding my dog over it so he could drink it. My boyfriend said he didn't know what else to do. FML

#21279204
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34227) - you deserved it (3442)

On 10/16/2014 at 4:53pm - misc - by anonymous - United States (Michigan)

Today, I got stitches in my breast. I never knew how much they jiggled until every bump on the road made my breast feel like it was on fire. FML

#21278689
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35078) - you deserved it (2454)

On 10/15/2014 at 10:33pm - health - by BoobiePain - Canada (New Brunswick)



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