Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

ekdfml

Offline (yesterday at 5:17am) | Search for a member

ekdfml

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 26 January 1994 (20 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 5103
  • Number of comments : 22
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 33 posted

About ekdfml : Clutzy college student

ekdfml's page activity

Visits<b>tchatfield9413</b> - the 11/08/2014 at 2:15pm<b>dimos4ever</b> - the 09/08/2014 at 7:23pm<b>macncheeze97</b> - the 08/03/2014 at 12:52pm<b>alexmisty88</b> - the 05/19/2014 at 3:36am<b>davered89</b> - the 05/12/2014 at 8:55pm<b>Mynamewontfi</b> - the 03/06/2014 at 3:53pm<b>elevensysix</b> - the 05/10/2013 at 1:19pm<b>XxXkyttiXxX</b> - the 02/22/2013 at 9:36am<b>Isoldael</b> - the 12/25/2012 at 6:04pm<b>phatdaddy62</b> - the 08/23/2011 at 4:10pm<b>Taipan</b> - the 12/14/2010 at 12:00pm<b>Zikk</b> - the 12/14/2010 at 3:14am

ekdfml's FML badges

Profile completed

You’ve filled out the necessary details. Having done so will be much appreciated.

Back from a party

An FML submitted on a Saturday morning between 5 and 6am can't be a good FML.

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

See all of ekdfml's badges

ekdfml's favorite FMLs

Today, my girlfriend of two years broke up with me because of the scratch marks on my back. I didn't have the nerve to tell her I tried to shower with the cat. FML

#21300928
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17463) - you deserved it (28137)

On 11/17/2014 at 7:56pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Indiana)

Today, my boyfriend broke the bed pretending to be a caterpillar. FML

#21300031
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25776) - you deserved it (2890)

On 11/16/2014 at 4:44am - love - by tine - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my husband and I told my parents I was pregnant with my first child. The only thing my father did was look at my husband and tell him his pull out game was weak. FML

#21299949
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33187) - you deserved it (3346)

On 11/16/2014 at 12:29am - kids - by wtfdad - United States (New Jersey)

Today, like any other day since that stupid movie Frozen came out, people have been asking me if I want to build a snowman, like they're the funniest people on the planet. My name is Elsa. FML

#21297408
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42508) - you deserved it (3792)

On 11/11/2014 at 11:34pm - work - by elsatheannoyed (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I walked into my bathroom, only to find my dad passed out on the floor with his pants around his ankles. FML

#21296970
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30903) - you deserved it (2596)

On 11/11/2014 at 1:56pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Illinois)

Today, after nearly two weeks of being stressed out due to financial issues, I decided to spend my last 4 dollars on stress-relieving body wash. Apparently this particular body wash causes me to break out in hives and now I have no money for rash cream. FML

#21296921
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34455) - you deserved it (6028)

On 11/11/2014 at 12:43pm - money - by killme - United States (Georgia)

Today, I saw a long black hair coming out of the drain. Thinking it was my sister's, I called her in and pulled it out for her to see, only to realize I was actually pulling out a long brown roach by the antenna. FML

#21296899
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33501) - you deserved it (4356)

On 11/11/2014 at 11:56am - animals - by izzy46111 - United States (Arizona)

Today, my wife slapped me for touching her boobs during sex. FML

#21296872
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43477) - you deserved it (4687)

On 11/11/2014 at 10:37am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, my cat tunneled her way under the covers to sleep beside me. It was really cute until she panicked in the middle of the night and practically skinned me alive trying to find her way out. FML

Today, I had a dream where I was cuddling with a girl. She rolled over to face me, snuggled up into the crook of my neck, then muttered in disgust, "Ugh, your breath stinks!" Cock-blocked in my own dreams. FML

#21296653
42 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31297) - you deserved it (3919)

On 11/11/2014 at 12:05am - misc - by mouthwash - United States (Ohio)

Today, I realized why I never hear my voice echoing when I sing to my boyfriend on Skype; he just mutes me. FML

#21296304
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32279) - you deserved it (9863)

On 11/10/2014 at 4:50pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I thought I felt my cellphone vibrating. Turned out it was just my girlfriend letting out a vicious fart against my leg. FML

#21296102
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34284) - you deserved it (4892)

On 11/10/2014 at 9:28am - love - by Anonymous (man) - Germany (Berlin)

Today, I left my dog alone while I went to work, like usual. He usually hangs out in the big bay window that faces the street. Today he decided to steal my vibrator and chew it while sitting in the window. I can only imagine how many people walked by and saw it. FML

#21295699
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29975) - you deserved it (6198)

On 11/09/2014 at 8:12pm - animals - by dogdays (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I excitedly told my mom that I'm pregnant with my second child. She shot back, "You know what's a REAL achievement? Jacking your dad off in church last week without anyone noticing. Aim higher." I really didn't need to know that. FML

#21294899
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39225) - you deserved it (3396)

On 11/08/2014 at 6:02pm - kids - by jennabee97 (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I took a video of a fellow employee doing nothing but watching YouTube videos at work. When I showed the video to my boss, hoping he'd be reprimanded, I got fired for operating video equipment on company grounds. FML

#21293428
194 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26315) - you deserved it (33007)

On 11/06/2014 at 2:09pm - work - by NoJobNovember - United States (Ohio)



FML's blog

  • K'Naye's illustrated FML
  • Woohoo it's the weekend! Winter is all around some of us, but not in our hearts. To help fight off the cold and seasonal depression, this week we're taking a look at love and tenderness. It's what keeps…

Friday 21 November 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: