ehrmagahd

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ehrmagahd

2Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Friday 23 December 1994 (21 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 2222
  • Number of comments : 9
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 5 posted

About ehrmagahd : I work as a cashier/florist/sampler/baker. I have some hella interesting stories to tell.

ehrmagahd's page activity

Visits<b>adrianb_rod</b> - the 09/02/2016 at 1:16am<b>fader402</b> - the 08/16/2016 at 4:22pm<b>RockyLovesARacer</b> - the 08/06/2016 at 8:38pm<b>jet223</b> - the 07/15/2016 at 6:57pm<b>ashby_nail</b> - the 07/08/2016 at 10:30am<b>dno79</b> - the 06/27/2016 at 10:52pm<b>Uiowa_biology</b> - the 06/19/2016 at 11:43am<b>XCOwens98</b> - the 06/08/2016 at 6:58pm<b>Draysor</b> - the 06/07/2016 at 6:45am<b>SweetMaria</b> - the 05/19/2016 at 1:35am<b>Azlarus</b> - the 04/22/2016 at 12:57pm<b>roman11</b> - the 04/16/2016 at 1:28pm<b>Cookie_Overlord</b> - the 04/10/2016 at 1:00am<b>player20270</b> - the 04/04/2016 at 12:13am<b>Birdmad</b> - the 03/07/2016 at 1:08am<b>Shamandalie89</b> - the 03/01/2016 at 9:40am<b>xxthechosenguyxx</b> - the 01/25/2016 at 2:29pm<b>Life_sucksXx</b> - the 01/04/2016 at 3:17am

Fucked!<b>cdncw</b> - the 05/13/2015 at 8:37pm<b>Nathan23xx</b> - the 04/24/2015 at 1:45pm

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ehrmagahd's favorite FMLs

Today, I was digging in my lawn, trying to ignore the suspicious glances coming from my nosy fuckball of a neighbor. When he asked what I was doing, I replied with dripping sarcasm, that I was digging up the schoolkids I killed last year. Fifteen minutes later, the cops he called arrived. FML

by diggingaplotforone / 08/11/2012 at 7:47pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I explained to my dad that I think I have a vaginal infection. I asked if he could take me to the doctor. He responded by saying, "Just shove some ice up there. It'll go away." FML

by hurts.to.pee / 01/19/2012 at 12:14am / United States / Health

Today, a man tried to rob the winery I worked at by knife-point. I managed to scare him off by throwing a bottle of wine at him. My boss fired me because I broke a $25 bottle of wine. FML

by Anonymous / 12/04/2011 at 12:19am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Work

Today, I was sitting in the hospital waiting area. An old lady was crying, and my five year old daughter asked her, "Are you okay?" The woman quietly nodded, prompting my daughter to scream at the top of her lungs, "Well shut up then!" FML

by Anonymous / 08/06/2011 at 9:40pm / United States / Kids

Today, I got a call from a man yelling and cursing at me, calling me a "selfish no-life asshole" for getting his "baby girl" pregnant. I'm 29 and she is 27 and we have been married for 3 years. FML

by Harry / 07/20/2011 at 3:40am / United States / Kids

Today, I was at the hairdressers getting a trim. The lady doing my hair commented on how beautiful and luscious my hair was, which made me feel really good. I later overheard her telling her colleague that hair as nice as mine was wasted on someone with a face like mine. FML

by ugly / 04/15/2011 at 2:43am / Australia (Victoria) / Health

Today, I got hit in the mouth with a hockey stick and lost four teeth. Yesterday I got my braces of six years removed. FML

by Anonymous / 11/30/2010 at 2:10pm / Ireland (Monaghan) / Health

Today, my boyfriend asked me to meet his parents over Christmas. I was ecstatic. But there was one condition: I must go dressed as a girl since he hasn't worked up the nerve to come out to his parents yet. We've been dating for over a year. FML

by neverdateaclosetcase / 11/17/2010 at 1:16pm / Canada (Ontario) / Love

Today, was parent appreciation day at my daughter's KG class. On the stage, each child was asked to define each parent in one word. When it was my daughter's turn, she looked at me hard, thinking. Finally, in the end she said, "My daddy is very fat." Everybody stared. FML

by Anonymous / 05/23/2010 at 7:00pm / Canada (Alberta) / Kids

Today, I entered my bedroom, ready to play some COD on my xbox 360. Instead, I find a note where my xbox used to be. It read "You think you can cheat on me and get away with it? Fuck you. I smashed the hell out of your stupid xbox." It was signed by my girlfriend. I never cheated on her. FML

by Anonymous / 01/06/2010 at 7:29pm / Canada (Newfoundland and Labrador) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend and I were watching a movie where a girl proposed to a guy. He said "I would hate it if that happened to me, obviously I don't want to get married if I haven't proposed myself." I was planning on proposing later. FML

by Anonymous / 11/26/2009 at 10:23pm / United States (Virginia) / Money

Today, I was at the park when I saw a homeless man sleeping on a bench. I thought it would be funny to throw a small rock at him. He thought it would be funny to pull out his knife and chase me for six blocks. FML

by I_Am_The_Edge / 06/11/2009 at 12:06pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went out for a smoke break. A homeless person walks up to me and asks for a cig. As I pull out my pack he says "Oh... Menthols... no I don't smoke that cheap shit". I was called cheap by a hobo. FML

by Kaboom / 04/21/2009 at 8:52am / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

Today, brand new cocktail dress: $300. Matching peep toe heels: $100. Getting my hair done at the salon: $80. Treating myself to a mani/pedi: $50. When finally meeting the guy I have been chatting online with for 2 months, I find out he's my cousin: priceless. FML

by Anonymous / 04/10/2009 at 2:42pm / United States (Michigan) / Love

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I was with my grandma waiting in a line. She only speaks Chinese and there was a black man in front of us talking his phone. My grandma tells me that the black man's really loud and annoying. The man finishes and turns and said fluently in Chinese, "What's wrong with loud black men?" FML

by kaichennnxx / 03/16/2009 at 10:09pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous