Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

ehrmagahd

Search for a member

ehrmagahd

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Friday 23 December 1994 (19 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 1133
  • Number of comments : 9
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 5 posted

About ehrmagahd : I work as a cashier/florist/sampler/baker. I have some hella interesting stories to tell.

ehrmagahd's page activity

Visits<b>Apollo182</b> - the 09/29/2014 at 10:18pm<b>poppypoptarts</b> - the 07/26/2014 at 12:47pm<b>Zechgauer</b> - the 05/06/2014 at 11:40am<b>MrDante</b> - the 04/17/2014 at 4:02pm<b>levodkamartini</b> - the 03/05/2014 at 10:23am<b>LostInTransation</b> - the 02/28/2014 at 12:44pm<b>lemmalongsnail</b> - the 02/25/2014 at 4:30pm<b>toasty_narwals</b> - the 02/15/2014 at 10:40am<b>turtlesarerad14</b> - the 02/10/2014 at 9:50am<b>tacojauns</b> - the 02/09/2014 at 4:33am<b>skierak97</b> - the 02/06/2014 at 10:59pm<b>keatshire</b> - the 12/28/2013 at 1:20am<b>hannamoon</b> - the 12/07/2013 at 3:22pm<b>kimmi5</b> - the 11/09/2013 at 9:45am<b>ireply_wlyrics</b> - the 10/24/2013 at 5:29pm<b>slimkelsey</b> - the 10/04/2013 at 9:59pm<b>soccerstar1996</b> - the 10/03/2013 at 1:11pm<b>philipino</b> - the 09/24/2013 at 5:40pm

ehrmagahd's FML badges

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

Socialite

You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

See all of ehrmagahd's badges

ehrmagahd's favorite FMLs

Today, I caught my boyfriend wearing yoga pants and taking pictures of his butt to post on a "Girls in yoga pants" site. He saw my expression and said, "Nah, it's cool, I hid my junk so they'll think it's a chick!" FML

#20451178
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39089) - you deserved it (5382)

On 01/10/2013 at 12:09am - intimacy - by Amy (woman) - United States

Today, a girl I've been talking to online for a while asked me if I wanted to meet her in person. Two hours of driving later, I end up at her house. When she opened the door, she screamed and called the cops on me. While detained, she called my phone asking why I never showed up today. FML

#20450521
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38188) - you deserved it (5778)

On 01/09/2013 at 6:55pm - love - by GDBeast (man) - United States

Today, my son got his first tooth, and is enthusiastically biting everything. I breastfeed. FML

#20450046
185 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32787) - you deserved it (6121)

On 01/09/2013 at 1:48pm - kids - by loveyouson (woman) - Denmark (Hovedstaden)

Today, I asked my mom what her biggest craving was when she was pregnant with me. Her answer: an abortion. FML

#20449894
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49361) - you deserved it (4757)

On 01/09/2013 at 11:07am - misc - by kk - United States

Today, my daughter learned a new song. This would be great, except for the lisp her teacher has. I now have a child screaming about the "itchy bitchy spider" at the top of her lungs. FML

#20448629
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34229) - you deserved it (2765)

On 01/08/2013 at 8:01pm - kids - by ugh (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, my boss "borrowed" my prescription sunglasses off my desk. She crashed her car because they made her dizzy, and thinks I should pay for the damages. FML

#20447961
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46845) - you deserved it (2463)

On 01/08/2013 at 12:45pm - work - by whateven (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my boyfriend of a year asked me to move in with him. I would have been touched at this gesture, had he not asked in the form of a text message, saying: "Got kicked out. Wanna get a flat or something?" FML

#20447722
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28845) - you deserved it (3496)

On 01/08/2013 at 8:31am - love - by movingbuddy (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I saw Les Misérables. I was singing along to one of the songs when the guy next to me dumped his soda over my head and told me to shut up. FML

#20447311
251 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16434) - you deserved it (91709)

On 01/08/2013 at 12:34am - misc - by maddiecat - United States (Missouri)

Today, within the first 15 minutes of a nonstop 8-hour flight, the guy sitting next to me picked an eyelash he found on my face, stared at it for a few seconds, and stuck it in his mouth. FML

#20447129
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41455) - you deserved it (2328)

On 01/07/2013 at 11:16pm - misc - by legitweirdo - United States (New York)

Today, while at work, a Beatles song came on the radio. I jokingly said, "These guys are pretty good, are they new?" Everyone thought I was being serious, and now they're convinced I'm an idiot. FML

#20446711
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15901) - you deserved it (32049)

On 01/07/2013 at 7:58pm - misc - by EffUrEll - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my girlfriend and I took a nap on my couch. She used my arm as a pillow, and everything was pretty peaceful, until she moved over and practically dislocated my shoulder. My screams of pain woke her, which was apparently an "asshole move" on my part. FML

#20446350
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27200) - you deserved it (2844)

On 01/07/2013 at 3:09pm - love - by Sawarski - United States

Today, my son sprayed Axe body-spray all over the house in the vain hope of covering up the scent of the joints he'd been smoking. FML

#20446338
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28146) - you deserved it (4552)

On 01/07/2013 at 3:01pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I was on a plane and realized that the woman next to me was hiding a hedgehog in a plastic container. I'm severely afraid of hedgehogs but not wanting to give the woman up and get her in trouble, I tried to stay quiet. Which led to me to quietly hyperventilate and pass out on the plane. FML

#20445879
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22362) - you deserved it (6693)

On 01/07/2013 at 5:21am - health - by scaredofhedges (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I visited my grandparents' house. While getting a drink from the fridge, I noticed the Christmas card my family sent them had my face scratched out. When I confronted them about it, they said it was the cat. They don't have a cat. FML

#20445318
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22538) - you deserved it (1757)

On 01/06/2013 at 7:50pm - misc - by HatedGrandson - United States

Today, after eight months of unemployment, I finally started at my new night job. Shortly after walking in, my boss came up behind me, whispered "hooorse dicksss" in my ear, and walked off without another word. I am terrified. FML

#20094121
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21693) - you deserved it (1755)

On 09/29/2012 at 8:11pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (Colorado)



Zach Stafford's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Zach's illustrated FML
  • Everybody's talking about Ebola at the moment. I have trouble keeping up with the latest trends. I'm going to wait until Christmas and see what special offers turn up in the shops, under funky new names…

Friday 17 October 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: