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edward80's FML badges
An insomniac or a creature of the dark
You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.
You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!
Back from a party
An FML submitted on a Saturday morning between 5 and 6am can't be a good FML.
edward80's favorite FMLs
by Anonymous / 01/06/2016 at 10:58am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
Today, my boss lost the company a very lucrative contract I had worked on for weeks because he wouldn't tolerate the client's "disrespect." The disrespect? Asking him to not interrupt her or put words in her mouth during a conference call with her employees. FML
by TheGreatSquirrel / 01/04/2016 at 5:10pm / United States (Wisconsin) / Work
by sharee / 12/19/2015 at 3:51pm / United States (Utah) / Intimacy
Today, I was talking to a friend and bemoaning the fact that my new coworkers keep mixing up my gender. She looked at me critically and said, "Yeah, until you can grow a decent beard, people are going to keep thinking you're an intern or a butch lesbian." FML
by Eternal_Babyface / 11/08/2015 at 12:14pm / United States / Work
by Anonymous / 08/02/2015 at 5:16am / Canada / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 05/03/2015 at 3:42am / United States (Maryland) / Miscellaneous
Today, I found out the name on my driver's license is incorrect. I don't know what's worse: the fact the government can't even copy a goddamn name correctly, or that it took me three months to notice, when a cop nearly arrested me for carrying a "fake" license. FML
by Anonymous / 04/25/2015 at 3:30am / Canada (British Columbia) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 04/22/2015 at 10:14am / United States (Georgia) / Intimacy
Today, I took my 5-year-old daughter to the play place at McDonalds but I had to keep her busy, instead of letting her play. A mom was teaching her 3-year-old daughter how to pole dance, using the play place's poles. FML
by Pandistoteles / 04/14/2015 at 5:17pm / United States / Kids
Today, I had to explain to my rabidly religious brother how two transvestites can buy fish at Petco while he's buying the same fish at the same Petco, and it doesn't equate to hitting on him. It's been two hours, and he's still sitting outside my door reading Bible verses and praying aggressively. FML
by mademoiselle meurtre / 04/12/2015 at 10:51pm / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 11/09/2014 at 1:49pm / United States (Missouri) / Miscellaneous
Today, I took a video of a fellow employee doing nothing but watching YouTube videos at work. When I showed the video to my boss, hoping he'd be reprimanded, I got fired for operating video equipment on company grounds. FML
by NoJobNovember / 11/06/2014 at 2:09pm / United States (Ohio) / Work
Today, I have such severe ADD that I can't focus without my medication. When I take the medication, I can only focus on one thing, but not necessarily the thing I need to be focusing on. I have a chem test soon, and I've been vacuuming my room for the past 4 hours. FML
by Anonymous / 09/25/2014 at 3:32pm / United States (Texas) / Health
by embarrassed girl / 06/07/2014 at 1:40am / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous
Today, less than a day after my cranky downstairs neighbor passed away, I woke up to banging sounds against his apartment ceiling, like the ones he used to make whenever I walked around during the night. I'm shitting myself in fear. FML
by mdsfkljsfsdrewr / 06/03/2014 at 3:01pm / Lebanon (Beyrouth) / Miscellaneous
- Today, I woke up to my boyfriend throwing my birth control box at me and shouting that I was a slut… Today, after long day at work, I stopped by my parents' house to say hi. After 30 minutes into the… Today, I was going through the history on my computer. Apparently, while I was at school my mother…