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edris_305's favorite FMLs
by lalala / 07/18/2010 at 12:02am / Philippines (Manila) / Health
Today, I was late to work because the metro broke down. Yesterday I was late to work because the train in front of me broke down. The week before that I was late to work because the swat team shut the entire metro station down. Even the interns think I'm making this up. FML
by Katie / 06/30/2010 at 7:36pm / United States (District of Columbia) / Work
by Anonymous / 02/05/2010 at 1:25am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
by CH / 12/07/2009 at 1:06am / United States (Missouri) / Miscellaneous
Today, I posted a note on Facebook about a weird dream I had about my ex-boyfriend, where I made out with him, then it transitioned into a vampires vs. werewolves battle. My ex private messages me and says there's a better chance of a vampires vs. werewolves battle than us ever making out again. FML
by ohiochibi / 12/03/2009 at 2:34pm / United States (Ohio) / Love
by DBR / 11/23/2009 at 5:12pm / United States (New York) / Work
Today, I was sitting in the cafeteria with my friends when I suddenly passed out due to my hypoglycemia. When I woke up, I discovered that I was still in the same spot and my friends had abandoned me to go to class. Also, my stuff was stolen. FML
by hey-ooo / 10/27/2009 at 9:15pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous
Today, while showering at my boyfriend's house early this morning, I saw a huge black spider on the wall. I am allergic to spiders, so in my disorientation I ran out of the shower screaming, slipped, sprained my wrist and bruised my tailbone. Turns out the spider was a clump of hair. My hair. FML
by emmey / 07/23/2009 at 3:43pm / United States (Oregon) / Animals
by Loveless / 07/19/2009 at 9:06pm / United States (Illinois) / Love
Today, I was riding my bike on the side of the road because there was no sidewalk. Then a car with a loud horn honked at me. Pissed off, I turned around and screamed "shut the fuck up!" It was my girlfriend's parents saying hi. FML
by ZZ / 06/29/2009 at 11:01pm / Canada (Ontario) / Transportation
by honeymoondisaster / 05/23/2009 at 12:44am / United States (California) / Intimacy
Today, I went up to a secluded mountain my boyfriend took me to for our first date. As I saw another couple hooking up in the bushes, I phoned my boyfriend to tell him someone found our secret spot. His Bob Marley ringtone started playing from the bush. FML
by liveforpeace_ / 04/28/2009 at 2:27am / Canada (British Columbia) / Intimacy
Today, I made an appointment with a therapist because lately I've been feeling alone and like no one cares about me. I waited at her office for about forty minutes before the receptionist informed me that she must have forgotten about the appointment. I was stood up by even my therapist. FML
by Anonymous / 04/14/2009 at 2:41pm / United States / Health
Today, my fiancé's parents visited. I keep chickens for their eggs, and his parents own a farm, so we had a connection. They told us to leave the house while they cooked us dinner. When we returned, we faced two steaming plates of chicken. My chickens. They had names. FML
by lanbon182 / 04/10/2009 at 1:11am / United States (California) / Animals
Today, I heard my boyfriend of 3 months talking with his friend, not knowing I could hear them. "Tonight's the night," my boyfriend says. "I'm finally going to tell her I love her!" I got really excited, deciding i loved him too. Then his friend says, "Awesome! But what about Kayla?" I'm Kayla. FML
by Anonymous / 03/22/2009 at 1:14pm / United States (Michigan) / Love