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ed311

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ed311

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Thursday 29 January 1998 (16 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 2575
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About ed311 : Hi. I'm Ed. I live in England. That's it, really

ed311's page activity

Visits<b>Treyzania</b> - the 05/04/2014 at 9:59pm<b>aliyourpally</b> - the 10/21/2013 at 9:22pm<b>JE553</b> - the 08/18/2013 at 11:27am

ed311's FML badges

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

See all of ed311's badges

ed311's favorite FMLs

Today, I was carrying my four-month-old son in a checkout line. An older couple behind us remarked that I would spoil my son if I carried him everywhere. My son responded by projectile vomiting all over the wife, then looked at me and giggled. FML

Today, I was finally given a parking spot at work. It turns out to be between an expensive sports car that never parks straight and a giant truck too big for its space. FML

#21215497
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28432) - you deserved it (166)

On 07/20/2014 at 7:57pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (Louisiana)

Today, my mother compared having me as a daughter to having a deadly kind of cancer. FML

#21213727
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37792) - you deserved it (4210)

On 07/19/2014 at 1:53am - misc - by wtf? - United States (Nevada)

Today, the guy I've been seeing for a year and a half ended it. Why? He found another girl. "She's just like you." FML

#21213656
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40615) - you deserved it (320)

On 07/19/2014 at 12:43am - love - by anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, my mom told me my relationship is a joke, because teenagers don't understand the meaning of relationships and commitment. I couldn't help but remind her how she's divorced three separate men to date. She hit me over the head so hard that snot flew out of my nose. FML

#21213268
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44075) - you deserved it (8166)

On 07/18/2014 at 7:06pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me because I'm too nice. Apparently, me being nice to him makes him feel guilty. FML

#21212029
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (3641) - you deserved it (330)

On 07/17/2014 at 4:48pm - love - by toonice - United States (Oregon)

Today, I came home early, only to hear a mad scramble in the living room. I found my now ex-girlfriend and best friend in there, sweaty and in their underwear. The idiot actually had the balls to claim he was teaching her how to do push-ups. FML

#21210956
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49197) - you deserved it (3607)

On 07/16/2014 at 4:09pm - love - by betrayed (man) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I babysat a 9-year-old kid for the first time. The moment his parents left the house, the little shit looked me dead in the eyes and let me know that if I didn't let him do whatever he wanted, he'd tell his parents that I touched him in his "no-no place". Suddenly I hate kids. FML

#21210892
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45569) - you deserved it (1360)

On 07/16/2014 at 2:56pm - kids - by fuck you, kid (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I asked my boyfriend if he could finally go down on me. He said, "No, that's disgusting" and then asked me for a blowjob. FML

#21207695
255 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44277) - you deserved it (5468)

On 07/13/2014 at 3:46am - intimacy - by NoSexForMe (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my boss called me to inform me that I'm being laid off. In my ensuing fit of rage, I deleted the recent project I've been working on for weeks. Pretty soon after, he called me back to let me know it was a prank. FML

#21207207
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41695) - you deserved it (14560)

On 07/12/2014 at 5:11pm - work - by Workhorse - United States (Ohio)

Today, my brother decided to help me artificially age some of my artwork by singeing the edges slightly. Apparently "my brother set fire to my homework" isn't a valid excuse. FML

#21206966
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37076) - you deserved it (5428)

On 07/12/2014 at 12:09pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (West Sussex)

Today, I got stood up on a date for three hours. I would have left much earlier but the whole time she had reassured me that she was on her way. And then I saw her tweeting about the pizza rolls she was making at home. FML

Today, I had to explain to my boss that using a wired connection instead of wifi won't stop his computer from getting viruses. He looked at me, open-mouthed and wide-eyed, like he was a 13-year-old boy and I was a pair of tits. Then he called me clueless and told me to get back to work. FML

#21206280
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36874) - you deserved it (3107)

On 07/11/2014 at 6:54pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I texted my mom asking how she was doing. Apparently she's great, and on her honeymoon. I didn't know she was getting married, or that my parents had just gotten divorced. FML

#21206148
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41128) - you deserved it (3875)

On 07/11/2014 at 4:02pm - misc - by morgan_rumm (woman) -

Today, on the bus, a little boy gave me the dirtiest look, pointed at my pregnant stomach, and menacingly said, "I know what you did." FML

#21205823
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47753) - you deserved it (6318)

On 07/11/2014 at 7:03am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)



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