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Offline (the 10/07/2015 at 10:06pm)



  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Monday 24 May 1993 (23 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 3202
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About eabsir2010 : I'm a 22 year old female married to my best friend from high school Nate. I have a beautiful 1 year old named Lucille.

eabsir2010's page activity

Visits<b>jonathan896</b> - the 07/11/2015 at 3:41pm<b>WeiXinLun</b> - the 01/28/2014 at 12:31am<b>brittanyrose329</b> - the 01/07/2014 at 9:28pm<b>OmgitsJay</b> - the 01/07/2014 at 1:58am<b>cskipgolfer2013</b> - the 01/05/2014 at 5:45pm<b>Vnzlan_girl</b> - the 11/05/2013 at 1:33pm<b>sweet0cheeks</b> - the 10/26/2013 at 5:11pm<b>notanimmigrant</b> - the 10/07/2013 at 10:53am<b>greyy_goooose</b> - the 09/10/2013 at 10:05pm<b>ECraine</b> - the 09/10/2013 at 7:03am<b>abbbeyS</b> - the 09/09/2013 at 5:16pm<b>chargers2588</b> - the 09/09/2013 at 1:16am<b>SSTRNK</b> - the 07/21/2013 at 1:46pm<b>iHiccupBS</b> - the 07/18/2013 at 8:03pm<b>MOLLMcAWESOME</b> - the 07/13/2013 at 7:55pm<b>averagelyawesome</b> - the 07/09/2013 at 7:29pm<b>jackiemora</b> - the 06/24/2013 at 7:22pm<b>itsmichellebitch</b> - the 06/23/2013 at 7:58am

eabsir2010's FML badges

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

See all of eabsir2010's badges

eabsir2010's favorite FMLs

Today, my girlfriend said she would give my penis a name: Gonzales. I asked why she wanted to name it that, and she said, "Because he's Speedy." FML

by Gonzales / 08/07/2015 at 3:47pm / Belgium (Vlaams-Brabant) / Intimacy

Today, I tried to kill a spider by throwing a shoe at it. All it did was slice the spider's egg sac open, releasing all its babies. FML

by Anonytard / 03/02/2014 at 5:38pm / Canada (Ontario) / Animals

Today, I found out that my lover and boyfriend of over 5 years has me listed in his contacts as "Vagina". FML

by ouch / 03/02/2014 at 3:44am / United States (Iowa) / Love

Today, and for the past 38 weeks of my pregnancy, my husband decided to amuse himself by following me around, making whale noises. FML

by Anonymous / 03/01/2014 at 5:42am / United States (Virginia) / Love

Today, I called a company for a problem with our septic tank. Two workers show up, I take them into the garden to show them the manhole cover at the top of it. They open it up. We then gaze upon a sea of condoms floating on the surface. My wife and I don't use condoms. FML

by Maxime / 02/27/2014 at 7:32pm / Love

Today, I learned that no matter how much you want the Nutella, it's never a good idea to deep-throat the knife. FML

by Anonymous / 02/27/2014 at 9:34am / United States (Colorado) / Miscellaneous

Today, I came home from a night out with the lads. My girlfriend refused to make love to me, saying my sperm were drunk and would raise hell in her uterus. FML

by vegas-81 / 02/09/2014 at 10:39pm / France / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend and I had sex. After a while, he started staring at my lady parts, and said my "vag looks like a mockingjay". He then stretched the lips apart like wings and made little "CA-CAW CA-CAW!" sounds. FML

by Goodyear / 01/19/2014 at 10:59pm / United States (Arizona) / Intimacy

Today, my family and I were having turkey for dinner. My boyfriend leaned in towards me and muttered, "I'll stuff your turkey later". Everyone heard and the whole room went dead silent. FML

by gimmeafknbreak / 01/17/2014 at 6:59pm / United States (New Mexico) / Intimacy

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my 4-year-old daughter figured out how to set a parental code lock on our television so we can't watch football because it scares her when we scream. She won't tell us no matter what we bribe her with. FML

by Anonymous / 12/30/2013 at 7:10am / Australia (New South Wales) / Kids

Today, I have to take time off from work to take part in an intervention because my sister's obsession with the guy from Harry Potter has crossed over into illegality. FML

by LeaveHimAlone / 12/29/2013 at 11:23pm / United States (Maryland) / Miscellaneous

Today, marks the third week since my sister's guinea pig learned to masturbate. He humps his wheel and makes squeaking noises for five minutes, then rolls over on his side and pants heavily. He does it at least twice a night while I'm trying to sleep. FML

by Anonomous / 12/28/2013 at 7:31pm / United States (Vermont) / Animals

Today, my boyfriend and I took a nap, fully clothed. I woke up to him panicking. He'd had a wet dream and was scared that his sperm somehow swam through several layers of clothing and got me pregnant. FML

by Anonymous / 12/06/2013 at 4:37pm / United States (New Mexico) / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend's idea of foreplay was to offer to make lunch, leave the room for a few minutes, then come back with no clothes on and offer me a "cockmeat sandwich". FML

by fuckadaisical / 12/06/2013 at 3:23pm / United Kingdom (Rhondda Cynon Taff) / Intimacy

Today, while having sex with my husband, we had to move around our cat during position changes. Our cat controls our sex life. FML

by anon / 12/02/2013 at 11:26pm / United States (Indiana) / Intimacy