About eabsir2010 : I'm a 22 year old female married to my best friend from high school Nate. I have a beautiful 1 year old named Lucille.
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eabsir2010's favorite FMLs
by Gonzales / 08/07/2015 at 3:47pm / Belgium (Vlaams-Brabant) / Intimacy
by Anonytard / 03/02/2014 at 5:38pm / Canada (Ontario) / Animals
by ouch / 03/02/2014 at 3:44am / United States (Iowa) / Love
by Anonymous / 03/01/2014 at 5:42am / United States (Virginia) / Love
Today, I called a company for a problem with our septic tank. Two workers show up, I take them into the garden to show them the manhole cover at the top of it. They open it up. We then gaze upon a sea of condoms floating on the surface. My wife and I don't use condoms. FML
by Anonymous / 02/27/2014 at 9:34am / United States (Colorado) / Miscellaneous
by vegas-81 / 02/09/2014 at 10:39pm / France / Intimacy
Today, my boyfriend and I had sex. After a while, he started staring at my lady parts, and said my "vag looks like a mockingjay". He then stretched the lips apart like wings and made little "CA-CAW CA-CAW!" sounds. FML
by Goodyear / 01/19/2014 at 10:59pm / United States (Arizona) / Intimacy
by gimmeafknbreak / 01/17/2014 at 6:59pm / United States (New Mexico) / Intimacy
Today, my 4-year-old daughter figured out how to set a parental code lock on our television so we can't watch football because it scares her when we scream. She won't tell us no matter what we bribe her with. FML
by Anonymous / 12/30/2013 at 7:10am / Australia (New South Wales) / Kids
by LeaveHimAlone / 12/29/2013 at 11:23pm / United States (Maryland) / Miscellaneous
Today, marks the third week since my sister's guinea pig learned to masturbate. He humps his wheel and makes squeaking noises for five minutes, then rolls over on his side and pants heavily. He does it at least twice a night while I'm trying to sleep. FML
by Anonomous / 12/28/2013 at 7:31pm / United States (Vermont) / Animals
Today, my boyfriend and I took a nap, fully clothed. I woke up to him panicking. He'd had a wet dream and was scared that his sperm somehow swam through several layers of clothing and got me pregnant. FML
by Anonymous / 12/06/2013 at 4:37pm / United States (New Mexico) / Intimacy
by fuckadaisical / 12/06/2013 at 3:23pm / United Kingdom (Rhondda Cynon Taff) / Intimacy
by anon / 12/02/2013 at 11:26pm / United States (Indiana) / Intimacy
- 1Today, I found out my parents have been slipping birth control pills into my morning orange juice… 2Today, I found out my husband has been catfishing my sixteen year-old brother for over a year. FML 3Today, I babysat a kid who was such a bratty little prick that I actually considered walking out on…