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dwyoung's FML badges
Up and coming moderator
It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.
Who’s the fairest of them all?
This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.
It’s in the can
Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!
dwyoung's favorite FMLs
Today, after having a long talk with my mother about gays, she told me that she was totally open. I felt completely relieved, being gay myself. Seconds later, she said, "But not for you. I want you to find me a nice girl that can give me lots of grand kids." FML
by EvilMother / 09/13/2012 at 8:57pm / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 09/13/2012 at 1:30am / Canada (British Columbia) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 09/12/2012 at 12:05pm / United States (California) / Work
Today, I was pulled over. The cop stated that he "couldn't see" me because I had "blended in with the dark car background", and that it looked like no one was driving. I was literally pulled over for being black. FML
by Anonymous / 09/12/2012 at 3:00am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
by apparently inexperienced / 09/11/2012 at 12:54pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Intimacy
Today, after moving in with a couple of vegan zoologists a few weeks ago, I discover that they don't believe that we have the right to kill cockroaches, and will not allow me to do so. The house is infested, and it's spread to my bedroom. FML
by Stevski / 09/11/2012 at 11:08am / Australia (New South Wales) / Health
by TheNaturalOrderofThingsSucks / 09/10/2012 at 11:13pm / United States (Washington) / Love
Today, my mother shared my phone number with my brother, despite my explicit wishes that she didn't. He immediately went and put it on Craigslist and several other websites. This is the fourth time I've had to change my number for that very same reason. FML
by Anonymous / 09/10/2012 at 10:14am / United States (Washington) / Miscellaneous
Today, while shopping, I saw a little girl and her mom. The girl was pouting so I tried to cheer her up by asking her if she was a princess, because she was so pretty. She smiled but her mom looked at me with disgust and told me to, "Get lost, pedo." I'm a 17-year-old girl. FML
by well okay then / 09/10/2012 at 12:39am / United States / Kids
by darawbs / 09/09/2012 at 8:39pm / United States / Work
by zed / 09/09/2012 at 1:21pm / Canada (Alberta) / Love
by Heavy D / 09/06/2012 at 9:45am / United States / Work
Today, my fiancé and I were having sex. I've been secretly taking Welsh lessons as a surprise for him, so when I was getting close, I whispered the Welsh for "Don't stop." He pulled out and accused me of cheating on him with his best friend. He won't believe anything else. FML
by gingerbetty / 09/04/2012 at 3:54am / United Kingdom (Swansea) / Intimacy
Today, I found out my friend swapped my girlfriend and probation officer's numbers in my phone. My girlfriend is wondering why I asked her permission to leave the country, and my probation officer said she can't wait to see me again. FML
by Anonymous / 09/02/2012 at 1:34pm / United States (Virginia) / Love
by Sarah / 08/30/2012 at 8:58am / United States (New York) / Health
- Today, I was about to have sex with my boyfriend. His best friend called and said he just beat God… Today, I realized how badly medical education has ruined me when I couldn't enjoy erotic literature… Today, I had a testicular ultrasound. The ultrasound tech was a very attractive woman. This is the…