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Offline (the 06/06/2014 at 4:59am) | Search for a member



  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 113
  • Number of comments : 21
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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duude989's page activity

Visits<b>dreamersad</b> - the 05/24/2015 at 9:47pm<b>ohcheriecherie</b> - the 05/13/2014 at 3:19pm<b>miffybunny</b> - the 04/28/2014 at 4:49am<b>AliceLockehart</b> - the 04/27/2014 at 10:25pm<b>fuzz94</b> - the 04/16/2014 at 4:56am<b>Federgirl</b> - the 04/15/2014 at 5:42pm<b>mathen</b> - the 04/15/2014 at 10:36am<b>xadoringx</b> - the 04/15/2014 at 7:21am<b>akorpija</b> - the 04/15/2014 at 3:01am<b>toomanyidiots</b> - the 03/09/2014 at 11:58pm<b>simmyiphone</b> - the 12/30/2013 at 8:08pm<b>Sailer16</b> - the 12/30/2013 at 12:46pm<b>triplebeerox</b> - the 12/30/2013 at 6:22am

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duude989's favorite FMLs

Today, while at work as a telemarketer, I called a customer on his home phone. Once I was connected, an automated voice said, "To speak with a customer, please press 1." Confused, I pressed one. I then heard loud laughter followed by, "Oh my god! What a dumbass!" before they hung up. FML


I agree, your life sucks (40143) - you deserved it (21498)

On 05/07/2014 at 11:57pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my overly-attached 14-year-old cat wanted attention while I was in a heated Skype argument with my girlfriend. Worked up from the fight, I raised my voice and said, "Not now, go away!" He ran to his little bed, had a heart attack and died. I was a complete dick to my cat in his last moments. FML


I agree, your life sucks (70415) - you deserved it (35714)

On 04/09/2014 at 2:40pm - animals - by Brody89 (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, it was my first ever live piano performance. It went all great until the end, when I stood up, slipped, and smashed face-first into the keys. I've lost half a tooth and all my dignity. FML


I agree, your life sucks (45759) - you deserved it (3704)

On 03/30/2014 at 2:45pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Worcestershire)

Today, I went to a coffee shop. As I headed over to stand in line, I tripped over my own feet. I got back up, then tripped up yet again. Everyone was staring, and I was so mortified that I went to leave. I then struggled with the door under their glares before realising it opened the other way. FML


I agree, your life sucks (43033) - you deserved it (6461)

On 03/23/2014 at 7:02pm - misc - by butterbody - United Kingdom

Today, after finishing an essay at the library, I fell asleep and had a dream about the essay crawling out through my laptop screen and trying to kill me. I woke by the librarian shaking me and telling me to stop screaming. I was mortified. FML


I agree, your life sucks (41089) - you deserved it (4619)

On 03/20/2014 at 12:48pm - work - by systematicpanic (woman) - United Kingdom (Leicester)

Today, I found out that my 15-year-old son is a prolific creator of My Little Pony themed hentai. I'm not a judgmental man, but he's probably going to hell. FML


I agree, your life sucks (44470) - you deserved it (8304)

On 03/09/2014 at 6:32pm - kids - by ashamed father (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I went to my bedroom for some alone time while my daughter watched TV. I didn't realize that my iPad was still connected to the Apple TV, until I hit play on some porn and heard a scream from the other room. FML


I agree, your life sucks (27402) - you deserved it (56453)

On 12/29/2013 at 2:01am - kids - by ConfusedDad - United States

Today, a hornet thought it would be fun to fly into a candle that I had lit. As the hornet burned to death, it flung its charred body at my face, which is more painful than it sounds. FML


I agree, your life sucks (42354) - you deserved it (3313)

On 10/28/2013 at 4:18pm - misc - by Asshole hornet - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, a customer was paying for his food. As he placed the money in my hand, he said, "Careful, those coins are sticky." I asked why. He replied, "You know, male stuff." FML

Today, my boyfriend and I went to one of the United States Mints since he enjoys coins. He looked at the money and seriously said, "I have such a hard on". He did. FML


I agree, your life sucks (48977) - you deserved it (5111)

On 10/03/2013 at 11:38am - intimacy - by EconM - United States

Today, I saw an elderly gentleman in the street wearing a shirt with a big QR code on it. Amused, I used an app on my phone to decode it. It gave me a shortened web address, which I followed, only to be faced with a picture of the same gentleman naked, grinning, and giving a thumbs up. FML


I agree, your life sucks (59226) - you deserved it (29454)

On 09/15/2013 at 3:53pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Romania (Bucuresti)

Today, I read a seemingly serious article online about giving your smartphone some extra charge by putting it in the microwave for one minute. My phone is now fried. FML


I agree, your life sucks (19473) - you deserved it (140573)

On 09/02/2013 at 4:37pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Arkansas)

Today, after I explained to my waitress that I have an allergy to butter, she nonetheless put some on my baked potato. When I had her get me another, without butter, she came back with one and then asked if I would like butter with it. FML


I agree, your life sucks (47615) - you deserved it (3361)

On 09/01/2013 at 12:40am - health - by Anonymous - Canada (Alberta)

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