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dunicha

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dunicha
  • Town/Country : Houston, USA
  • Title : Madam
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2372
  • Number of comments : 101
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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dunicha's favorite FMLs

Today, I was playing with my phone after midnight, and I kept getting calls from a withheld number. The guy just breathed heavily and wouldn't speak. When the third call came, I asked "who the hell are you?" The call ended, and my dad yelled from outside my door: "ME! Now go to sleep!" FML

#20860349
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37076) - you deserved it (12545)

On 08/30/2013 at 1:24pm - kids - by thanks, dad... (woman) - Romania (Maramures)

Today, my little sister opened a lemonade stand in front of our house. Surprisingly, she actually had a lot of customers, all kids. Two hours or so later, some parents came back complaining and threatening to sue my family. Turns out that what we thought was lemonade was actually beer. FML

Today, I brought my Japanese girlfriend home for dinner with my family for the first time. They all got drunk and made heaps of racist jokes right in front of us. My dad forgot her name and started calling her "Rice Ball" instead. FML

#20858245
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51497) - you deserved it (3710)

On 08/28/2013 at 6:35pm - love - by Thanks everyone (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I came into the kitchen to see how dinner was coming along. My mother was milling the meat around the skillet with the cat's poop scooper as a spatula. FML

#20856980
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38373) - you deserved it (2350)

On 08/27/2013 at 8:32pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Nebraska)

Today, it was the day of my wedding. I had a massive headache a couple of hours before the ceremony so I decided to take a nap. I told my brother to wake me up an hour before it started. He forgot. Now everyone thinks I ran out on my wife. FML

#20856967
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42662) - you deserved it (6216)

On 08/27/2013 at 8:23pm - love - by dhskkf (man) - United States

Today, I was in a rush, so I was removing my nail polish while using the toilet. Everything was going fine, until I used the toilet paper in my hand to wipe. It was covered in nail polish remover. It still burns. FML

#20856532
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32671) - you deserved it (16848)

On 08/27/2013 at 2:13pm - health - by anditburnsburnsburns - United States (Virginia)

Today, my daughter managed to crash my car. It's okay though, the insurance will cover it. However, it won't cover all the items she damaged crashing into a garage sale. FML

#20856229
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36728) - you deserved it (2942)

On 08/27/2013 at 6:17am - kids - by Idontknowwhattodo (man) - United States (California)

Today, I got in a heated fight and ended up being punched in the jaw. The fight was about Harry Potter. FML

#20856159
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32945) - you deserved it (18486)

On 08/27/2013 at 3:21am - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (New Brunswick)

Today, my boyfriend dumped me for "cheating" on him by using a vibrator. FML

#20851263
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48000) - you deserved it (14209)

On 08/23/2013 at 7:30pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, as I was walking downstairs to get breakfast, I saw my parents had decided to have a quickie on the couch. I had to awkwardly stand out of sight on the stairs, too scared to go down, or even back up, because our stairs creak. FML

Today, I was visiting my cousin's farm. Going out for a morning stroll, I took an apple with me to munch along the way. As I was eating it, I heard a distant thumping sound and was suddenly slammed into the ground. When I looked up, a horse was eating my apple. I got mugged by a horse. FML

#20836718
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50701) - you deserved it (5704)

On 08/14/2013 at 5:11am - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, while cleaning my ears with Q-tips, I came in my pants. FML

#20835942
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45697) - you deserved it (16293)

On 08/13/2013 at 7:53pm - intimacy - by ANON (man) - United States (California)

Today, out of partying reflex, I downed Communion wine like a vodka shot. FML

#20830409
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21968) - you deserved it (42568)

On 08/10/2013 at 6:05am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I let a friend read a draft of the novel I'm writing. She claimed the antagonist is blatantly based on her, and threatened to sue me if I don't pay her royalties. The antagonist is an ancient, insane goblin witch. I guess I see now how this confusion could arise. FML

#20829558
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41169) - you deserved it (2702)

On 08/09/2013 at 6:53pm - work - by pardon my English :$ (woman) - France

Today, I sprayed down some ants in my house. In the sea of ant corpses was a single living ant seemingly cradling a dead one in its arms. I'm convinced I just became the villain in an epic tragedy. Now I have to live with my ant problem because I can't bear to tear another family apart. FML

#20824961
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44192) - you deserved it (20773)

On 08/07/2013 at 1:40am - animals - by Blood on my hands (woman) - United States



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