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dunicha's FML badges
100 kick ass comments
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dunicha's favorite FMLs
Today, I was shopping for my little sister's birthday. She loves manga. I've never read manga, so I bought a couple of novels from the "popular" shelf. Turns out if they have white covers it means they are "adult" books. I bought my sister a "lolicon" manga - filled with prebuscent naked girls. FML
by loli-conned / 06/21/2009 at 6:10pm / United Kingdom (Hertford) / Kids
Today, I got myself a cool pair of colored contacts. I was wearing them while at home, so that I'll get used to them. Then I had to go to a job interview. I forgot to take them out. I went to a job interview with zebra-print eyes. FML
by creepyeyes / 06/21/2009 at 2:37pm / Canada (Ontario) / Work
by jinxofsocal / 06/21/2009 at 12:16am / United States (California) / Intimacy
Today, while walking in the mall, I had two people race past me in wheelchairs. Thinking they were racing, I started rooting for the one guy that was ahead. Turns out his wheelchair was malfunctioning and the other was chasing after to help. He then slammed and fell into the water fountain. FML
by meantowheels / 06/20/2009 at 10:29pm / United States (Michigan) / Miscellaneous
Today, I came home from work and had to pee so badly that I ran to the bathroom and ripped my pants down. My touch screen phone dropped from my pocket and started calling my boyfriend. Since I couldn't quite reach the phone, I left a message of me peeing on his cell. FML
by WhyTheFNot / 06/20/2009 at 2:06pm / United States (Washington) / Miscellaneous
by OompaLoompa / 06/18/2009 at 9:32am / United Kingdom / Miscellaneous
Today, I went commando because its 98 degrees and sweaty boxers are a pain. While walking to class at UT I heard a girl laugh behind me, I turned and flashed a quick smile and kept walking. It turns out I had sweat through my khakis and she totally could see my crack. Texas weather sucks. FML
by Longhorn2011 / 06/17/2009 at 1:44pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous
Today, I walked past a building site near my house, there was a sign saying "WARNING - Beware of the scaffolding". I started laughing at the stupidity of the sign, and walked straight into a metal pole. FML
by jonnyc / 06/17/2009 at 9:40am / United Kingdom (Hertford) / Miscellaneous
by locksmack / 06/14/2009 at 8:46am / Australia (Victoria) / Miscellaneous
Today, my crush came to my house to watch movies with me. We were sitting on the couch when he turned to me and said that he had had a dream about me the night before. I moved in to kiss him, thinking he liked me. He then added that I had fallen of a cliff and he had pissed himself laughing. FML
by Mojo_Jojo / 06/13/2009 at 7:01am / China (Beijing) / Love
Today, I was cleaning out my fiancé's room while he was away so we could move into our new home. Not only did I find a few gay nudie mags, but also some interesting love letters from a nice man named Pablo. Apparently I need to do a lot more than cleaning his room to excite him. Like grow a penis. FML
by vickyxanne / 06/12/2009 at 8:10pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Love
Today, In my science class I sit next to my friend Jill. My teacher always gets our names confused calling me Jill and her Liz. She decided to combine our names. I'm now known as Jizz. My teacher clearly has no idea what it means. FML
by mcullen21 / 06/12/2009 at 2:50pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Miscellaneous
by apav / 06/11/2009 at 7:52am / Australia (New South Wales) / Work
by Anonymous / 06/10/2009 at 9:12am / United States (Maine) / Kids
Today, it was my girlfriend's birthday. To surprise her, I told her that I was going away on business, and could not be there on her birthday. When I show up at her house to surprise her with a present and cake, she opens the door in her underwear, beside a man in his boxers. She was surprised. FML
by SURPRISE / 06/09/2009 at 8:13pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Love