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  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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dumass30

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dumass30
  • Town/Country : Boston, America
  • Title : Madam
  • Birth Date : Friday 27 February 1987 (24 years)
  • Number of visits : 640
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About dumass30 : My fav. color is green and i luv soccer

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dumass30's favorite FMLs

Today, my brother's best friend spent the night and was changing with the door partially open. He's super hot and as I was watching him change, he sneezed. Forgetting he didn't know I was watching him, I said bless you. He called me a freak, slammed the door in my face and told my parents. FML

#4235040 (472)

I agree, your life sucks (9046) - you deserved it (80957)

On 08/02/2009 at 6:03pm - misc - by jeeperspeepers (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I went to see a movie with 4 friends. I didn't realize that I was the only one who didn't have a date. The theater row had just enough room for everyone but me, I got to sit in back of everyone else while they were making out in front of me for 2 hours. FML

#4222573 (108)

I agree, your life sucks (40958) - you deserved it (4065)

On 08/02/2009 at 2:11am - love - by Devin (man) - United States (Vermont)

Today, I was walking down the strip with a friend when we saw a homeless man with no arm. I felt bad, so I gave him some cash and I looked into his poor little eyes when he put out his arm for a hug. Without thinking, I hugged him. Right as I was thinking, "wtf am I doing," he kissed my boob. FML

#4021792 (165)

I agree, your life sucks (12706) - you deserved it (36030)

On 07/25/2009 at 1:19am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Kansas)

Today, I checked an old photosharing account. I got a new phone last year and didn't realize all the pictures I took with the new phone would still automatically upload to my account. Unknowingly, I posted naked pics of myself online. Not one of my friends told me. FML

#3884165 (108)

I agree, your life sucks (10196) - you deserved it (37373)

On 07/19/2009 at 4:14pm - misc - by nudie (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, to get back at me for breaking up with him, my ex-boyfriend thought it would be really funny to post semi nude pictures of me on Craigslist. To top it off, he decided to give all 200+ people who responded to my ad my home phone number. I'm getting non-stop calls from horny freaks. FML

#3832351 (175)

I agree, your life sucks (42887) - you deserved it (13941)

On 07/17/2009 at 2:25pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, at the end of a night of heavy drinking, I decided it was a good idea to go off into the park with a friend of mine. We ended up fooling around in the park, when a couple of kids stole our clothes. We had to walk back to town with no clothes on. FML

#3792630 (117)

I agree, your life sucks (9751) - you deserved it (51800)

On 07/16/2009 at 2:15am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, my girlfriend, who never initiates sex, pulled me into my room and onto my bed with kisses and other seductive behavior. As I'm thinking about how awesome it is that's she's doing this for once, she reaches down, grabs my underwear, and gives me the worst wedgie I've ever received. FML

#3684210 (221)

I agree, your life sucks (58865) - you deserved it (9177)

On 07/12/2009 at 1:38am - intimacy - by robinhoood (man) - United States (California)

Today, I thought I was home alone so I went to take a shower and left my door open. My dog came in, stole my bra, and ran out of my bathroom. I jumped out and followed him only to find out that my brother had two of his friends over. They all saw me naked and my dog had my bra in his mouth. FML

#3582507 (195)

I agree, your life sucks (39467) - you deserved it (8163)

On 07/08/2009 at 1:51pm - animals - by coral (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I won $200 a contest at a bar. The manager took me to a vault where money collected from the strippers go into a pool. He told me that at least half of the bills were slid through a strippers butt crack so I was to "choose wisely". FML

#2427031 (164)

I agree, your life sucks (34264) - you deserved it (6172)

On 05/30/2009 at 7:39am - money - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Manitoba)