Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

duma191

Offline (the 09/11/2014 at 1:53am) | Search for a member

duma191

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Friday 16 April 1993 (21 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 9858
  • Number of comments : 52
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

duma191's page activity

Visits<b>kelseysking</b> - the 09/16/2014 at 11:21am<b>happygolucky16</b> - the 04/12/2014 at 5:17pm<b>SoftBananas</b> - the 01/14/2014 at 8:10am<b>RockUntilYouDie</b> - the 11/28/2013 at 4:34pm<b>SnowboarderFX</b> - the 11/28/2013 at 8:46am<b>lolalola47l</b> - the 11/13/2013 at 1:28pm<b>cmchewy</b> - the 10/15/2013 at 11:14pm<b>iamataco</b> - the 10/15/2013 at 12:39am<b>smartin123</b> - the 09/26/2013 at 5:51pm<b>cha0t1c</b> - the 09/22/2013 at 1:44am

duma191's FML badges

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

I’m your new creative director

You had to give your opinion on this new “piece” that the whole world is talking about.

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

See all of duma191's badges

duma191's favorite FMLs

Today, I started a new job. Three of my Kenyan coworkers keep getting together and reminding me that having more than one wife is okay in their country. I've gotten 3 marriage proposals from married men so far. FML

#21255696
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34195) - you deserved it (2827)

On 09/10/2014 at 1:16pm - work - by notmarryingyou - United States (Washington)

Today, my girlfriend went shopping at Victoria's Secret with me. While she was in the fitting room, her parents walked by and saw me. They don't approve of the store, so I panicked and told them I was considering becoming a woman. FML

#21255419
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41944) - you deserved it (11680)

On 09/09/2014 at 11:16pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, a middle-aged customer tried to pay for a $2 ice cream bar with a credit card. It was declined, so he made me swipe it again. Declined. "Quit touching the metal strip," he scowled. I held the outer edge of it and swiped. Declined. He then bitched me out as his mother paid for him. FML

Today, I fell asleep with my luggage at a bus terminal. Upon waking up, I found that someone had opened my bags and stolen all my socks. FML

#21255144
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36466) - you deserved it (7116)

On 09/09/2014 at 4:23pm - misc - by Anonymous -

Today, I found out I sent several embarrassing videos while under the influence of the meds I was given while getting my wisdom teeth out. When I asked my mom why she didn't take my phone, she said she tried but I started whining and growling at her. FML

Today, I invited my deadbeat dad over for dinner, hoping we could resolve our issues and build a proper relationship. Just minutes after he arrived, I caught him stealing money from my purse. He actually said I owe him for raising me. He ditched my mom and me when I was 5. FML

#21255044
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43521) - you deserved it (3393)

On 09/09/2014 at 12:47pm - money - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, my husband injured his back badly. He's taken three percocets, because according to him, he knows the dosage better than his doctor, and is demanding that I let him drive himself to work, with no pants on. FML

#21254463
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38929) - you deserved it (3383)

On 09/08/2014 at 1:56pm - health - by jkim - United States (California)

Today, I was replaced in the symphony I play in. I play the clarinet, and a standard symphony only uses two, so getting into one can be quite competitive. My conductor's reasoning? "I was sure you were going to college." I never mentioned college to him, other than saying I wasn't going. FML

Today, I'm staying with my grandma and her older sister while my parents are away. It's been two hours and so far they've popped vicodins, talked about banging Alex Trebek, and had a farting contest. FML

#21253639
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35201) - you deserved it (3888)

On 09/07/2014 at 11:11am - misc - by imgonnadie (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I came home early to surprise my wife. No, it's not what you're thinking: I didn't find her cheating on me. She wasn't even home, but my dad was. He'd used his spare key and was on my sofa, drinking my beer and watching my TV. The first words out of his mouth? "Your beer's shit." FML

#21253167
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36662) - you deserved it (3558)

On 09/06/2014 at 5:08pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, I looked at a girl's profile on a dating website, and it told her I'd visited it. Later on, she sent me a message. It said: "Don't even think about it." FML

#21253110
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33751) - you deserved it (3166)

On 09/06/2014 at 3:29pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, my mother yelled at me for not doing all of my homework. She got so mad, she tore up a drawing I'd spent over a week working on. That was my art homework. FML

#21253019
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43979) - you deserved it (3316)

On 09/06/2014 at 1:25pm - misc - by StillPissedOffAtIrony (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, while working at McDonald's, a woman returned to the drive thru because her fries weren't hot enough. She was so angry about coming back that she threw her cold fries at me through the window and told me to "choke on them." FML

#21252828
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36068) - you deserved it (6083)

On 09/06/2014 at 2:11am - work - by fastfoodslave (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I had to take bus to work, because yesterday my car was hit by a bus. While standing there, I noticed the driver kept looking back at me every now and then. As I went to get off, he looks at me again and says: "Sorry..." FML

#21252700
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44413) - you deserved it (2613)

On 09/05/2014 at 10:36pm - work - by crop circle galore - United States

Today, my boyfriend again told me how he wants to have an open relationship. Of course, this means he can do what he likes with anyone, but if I so much as kiss someone else, I'm a cheating slut. FML

#21252587
217 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44430) - you deserved it (6273)

On 09/05/2014 at 6:59pm - intimacy - by onlywantuanyway -



FML's blog

  • On FML, it's Halloween every day
  • As you know, we never pass up the chance to open up a light beer and plunge into the depths of the FML archive to come up with some sort of theme. Most holidays, national or otherwise, are pretty well represented.…

Friday 31 October 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: