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dulayole

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dulayole
  • Town/Country : Thousand Oaks, California
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Thursday 20 April 1995 (19 years)
  • Number of visits : 307
  • Number of comments : 15
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About dulayole : I am the man without a name

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dulayole's favorite FMLs

Today, I had to pick my son up from school after he beat the crap out of another student. The words that made him go nuts were apparently, "You mad, bro?" FML

#19607657
262 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19422) - you deserved it (2673)

On 05/11/2012 at 3:30pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Sweden (Vastra Gotaland)

Today, I asked my dad if my girlfriend could sleep over. He winked at me and agreed. When I brought her home, we went to my room for a quickie. There, I saw that my dad had taped multiple Richard Simmons posters to the wall, causing my girlfriend to suddenly come down with a "headache." FML

#19607447
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10685) - you deserved it (18499)

On 05/11/2012 at 2:29pm - love - by cockblocked (man) - United States (South Carolina)

Today, while making my daily offering of turd to the porcelain throne, I took out my phone and started playing a game. I suddenly felt a tickling sensation on my leg, and I freaked out as I saw hundreds of ants had emerged from behind the toilet. FML

#19215354
191 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27183) - you deserved it (3629)

On 03/04/2012 at 5:20pm - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Quebec)

Today, the boy I tutor failed his math test. As a result, the family fired me. The boy failed because he forgot to write his name at the top. FML

#19190848
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31135) - you deserved it (1706)

On 02/29/2012 at 7:01pm - kids - by Fairy31 (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, my family started their own version of the Hunger Games. With farts as their ammo, they've been tackling and gassing everyone until their victim "dies" by surrendering. My house is a flatulent war zone, and I fear waking up blind. FML

#19109077
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19355) - you deserved it (1729)

On 02/18/2012 at 5:22pm - health - by district12 (man) - United Kingdom (Buckinghamshire)

Today, I showed off my new tattoo to my friends. Too bad it says "Walk Earless" now instead of "Walk Fearless." That's right, I'm now supporting Van Gogh. FML

#18997714
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11962) - you deserved it (25380)

On 02/05/2012 at 12:54am - misc - by inked - United States (Alabama)

Today, I found out that the daily "vitamins" that my dad has been giving me for the last three months were actually weight loss pills. FML

#18876628
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23652) - you deserved it (4949)

On 01/22/2012 at 1:10am - health - by suckstobefat - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I caught my mother attempting to write a $1400 cheque. To whom? The proprietor of a "Christian charity fund" with whom she had been having Internet conversations. The proprietor's name, and that on the cheque, was "Herp McDerpington". FML

#18540980
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28310) - you deserved it (2177)

On 12/18/2011 at 12:18am - misc - by scammed - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I went to eat the orange I'd brought to work, but couldn't find it. After minutes searching, I found it. Nailed to the ceiling. FML

#18517264
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23252) - you deserved it (2317)

On 12/15/2011 at 1:57am - work - by Username - United States (California)

Today, after trying to find the perfect picture for the guy I have a huge crush on, I finally found one and sent it to him. His return picture? Himself in a Batman mask and sombrero. FML

#18516515
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17093) - you deserved it (9103)

On 12/15/2011 at 12:00am - love - by scribbles1475 (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I was casually shopping at Walmart. Everything was normal until the young guy browsing the aisle next to me suddenly approached me and whispered "sperm" into my ear. My spine has never experienced a chill like this one before. FML

#18398754
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27401) - you deserved it (3489)

On 11/30/2011 at 10:11pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, at the nail salon, a Korean woman was making fun of me. I kindly told her, in Korean, that I understood. She kindly told me, in English, that she didn't care. FML

#18150713
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38895) - you deserved it (3511)

On 11/03/2011 at 8:16pm - work - by EunJung - United States

Today, I dreamed I was getting married. I was wearing a white dress, had incredible cleavage and perfectly done makeup. Just one problem. I'm a guy. FML

#14968643
206 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44125) - you deserved it (8911)

On 02/14/2011 at 1:24am - misc - by bride (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I tried convincing my Valentine-hating boyfriend to send me a card, by explaining how important it is to me. He finally agreed and sent me a card. I opened it up, and it wished me 'harmony and well-being on Lupercalia'. What is Lupercalia? It's an ancient Roman festival where men run down the street naked, whipping people with goat skins to encourage fertility. FML

#8250331
210 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7116) - you deserved it (29941)

On 02/14/2010 at 1:56pm - love - by CrappyValentine (woman) - Netherlands (Noord-Holland)

Today, two of my girlfriends and I went to a bar. The only action any of us got was a 50 year old man who came up and handed us "An origami vagina for the pretty ladies." FML

#2463557
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39788) - you deserved it (4545)

On 05/31/2009 at 12:46pm - misc - by ailat0107 (woman) - United States (New Jersey)



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